Take Me Somewhere Nice
by Hack.Drawer
Summary: Sanji woke up from a hard night out and in a wholly unfamiliar world - modern Sanji has to learn the hard way what it takes to survive at sea, but as he does so, he realizes that the world he left behind has a dark secret that only his dying cellphone can reveal. The others keep calling him a 'ghost', but he knows for sure he's alive...right? AU, TWT, Hard angst, tragedy *COMPLETE*
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This isn't a sequel to 'White Rabbit' in any way. It's a brand new story. I wrote it frantically because I saw a picture. (I need to stop looking at pictures.) This one is already angsty. And prepare for flawed characters.**

 **Check out my Tumblr :D**

 **Chapter One –**

When he awoke, he knew immediately that he didn't feel good. There was a swaying motion that made him feel as if he were in movement, as if he were in a train – a _strongly_ swaying train. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, tasting the cotton aftereffects of too much alcohol and cigarettes and the lingering taste of last night's dinner. His head didn't agree to it, either, and he lifted it slowly, blinking at the cheery bright sunlight that illuminated the bar. Then he squinted hard, reaching up to push his hair back from his face.

Next to him was a melted candle, cooled to a twist around the pillar it sat atop of. In front of him was some paper, a pen, and squiggles that didn't look like anything he recognized. Next to that was a container of what looked to be apples with a shimmery, starry colored skin – like looking up at the night sky from the desert. There was a teacup sized plate next to that, with remnants of bluish colored apple slices atop of it. A small paper with squiggles on that suggested notes had been taken of the apple – the drawings on it were labeled neatly, with arrows pointed at the meat and skin.

Blinking, he looked around himself, wondering why they'd leave him passed out at the bar. Were the others just as wasted as he felt? Did they leave him?

The kitchen area was wide, decorated with minimal cheer, with a long table and chairs in front of him, a long bench seat against the far wall, a ladder that led upward. The round windows showed him blue skies and a bright morning. The swaying motion made him sick.

Trying to ignore the feeling to vomit, he slipped off the stool with clumsy action, holding his stomach. He swallowed back bile a few times, then stumbled towards the doorway. He made to push it open, and could not.

 _I'm locked in_! he thought with some terror, pushing and pushing, grunting with the effort. He reached for the handle to jiggle it, then realized all he had to do was pull. With an embarrassed expression, he pulled and walked out, covering his eyes with one hand. He was assaulted by many things at once; the smells of a salty sea, the sound of seagulls calling in the skies, the sounds of water rushing all around him, the creak of a boat as it negotiated these gentle waves that caused the uncomfortable swaying motion.

He reached out for the railing in front of him, lowering his hand from his face.

 _Where am I_? he wondered with horror, unsure if he was dreaming. He pinched himself, but all it did was hurt that part of his arm. He looked over the deck as it was open to him – looking at the stretch of green grass, the mast, the soldier's dock across from him. The sails flutter gently in the morning breeze, and he clapped a hand over his mouth as he stumbled away from the railing and went running for the nearby side railing. He leaned over as far as he could and puked, hurling into the dark colored waves below while clinging to the railing with both hands, legs nearly taking him over as the swaying motion continued.

Then he laid over the railing with an uncomfortable groan, hands dangling over as his headache worsened and his stomach continued to try and make its way to his throat and sweat began to build at his hairline. He then lurched away from the railing, patting his pockets for his phone. Once he found it, he saw with dismay that he did not have service – but the most important thing was the battery life. 98%. A truly magical number. He'd need it just to get back home….from wherever he was.

"Thank you, Law!" he exclaimed, holding his phone up with a cheered smile.

"What?"

He nearly dropped his phone at the sound of a voice nearby, and he looked over to see the man coming up the stairway with a grumpy expression. He stalked over with a dramatic wave of his arms. "Ah! Pooh Bear! Oh my god, I was seriously freaking out! Where'd you go? How could you leave me like that? All by myself?"

There was something wrong with the picture. This man _wasn't_ his boyfriend. This one was too skinny. He looked too dangerous. There were tattoos on his hands and arms and he wore a black shirt with a heart symbol on the sleeves; Law would never wear anything like that. Those narrowed eyes with pronounced eye bags weren't his, either. There were white patches visible on his slightly tanned skin, and before Sanji could examine them further, he rubbed his eyes frantically. This man _wasn't_ his boyfriend. He was some sort of imposter wearing a different version of his skin. He was so embarrassed using the private pet name – one of many that he used when it was only them – that his face and neck reddened with utter mortification.

" _What_ , Mr Blackleg?"

For a few moments, Sanji didn't know what to say. Because he didn't know where he was, and he didn't know who this person was, and because there was no service on his phone. So instead of answering, he took a couple of steps back, then hastily strode away, towards the back of the deck. He looked at his phone again, holding it up high, hoping to catch a signal of some kind. When nothing happened, he gave a curse of frustration, and looked at his messages. But the last one he'd had was Law asking him if he were ready yet. That had been _hours_ ago – that had been before the restaurant. _Before_ the bar, _before_ the shots with Zoro and Nami and Shachi, _before_ he blacked out and who knows what happened because he should've never been drinking in the first place!

He felt like throwing up again.

 _Where was he?_

Sanji looked up, and realized how massive the sea was. There was nothing in the horizon that signaled any type of land, and there were clouds to the northeast that were white and puffy, like cotton balls. The sails fluttered gently, and the wake behind the ship left a bumpy indenture in the waves. In the far distance, some creature broke the surface and crashed back down. The sky wasn't the type of blue he was used to – it was so open, so…blue! He had to admit, he hadn't seen this type of sky, before, even when they went to Burning Man that one year – such a bad idea, he needs to _never drink again_ -

" _Oh my God_ ," he muttered to himself, eyes wide with awe, then dawning horror. "I've been stolen by pirates."

"You're behaving strangely, Mr Blackleg. Was it something you ate? Or perhaps the stress of your family situation that you've left behind?"

He whipped around, nearly dropping his phone. That boyfriend imposter was staring at him from a safe distance, looking ready to strike if he had to. Sanji hurried away from him without saying anything, trying not to panic. Once he was back where he started, he felt sick again. He pulled at the door, struggling with it, propping a foot against the wall for effort as he strained to open it. Horror iced his veins – it'd locked on his way out.

"Let me in! Let me back in!" he muttered over and over, looking in the direction he'd come, expecting to see that weird predator coming after him. Desperation made him cling to the handle and shifted hold to stand on the door with one foot propped up against the doorframe, yanking with all his might.

Moments later, a tattooed hand pushed the door in, and Sanji rode along with it, giving the other man a mortified expression as the door creaked.

Law watched him from the doorway with a suspicious expression. "Maybe you should have your doctor see you."

Sanji hopped down onto the floor and shut the door on him hastily. Then he searched for a place to hide. This time, the door was kicked in, and he managed to find a storeroom that had a lock, so as soon as he twisted around to shut that door, he locked it, breathing heavily. Then he searched through the contacts in his phone and pressed on an icon. He couldn't call out. There was no service. Holding the phone high above his head, he searched for a signal once more, and tripped over some barrels, some bags in his path. He hit some shelves on the way down, knocking over cans, jars and bags that caused a lot of noise. But he held his phone close to his chest because he did not want to break it.

Once the noise and objects settled around him, he looked at his phone once more. 97%.

He locked it, then looked around himself. This was where they stored the food. It had a strange smell to it, almost musty, but the barrels were secure and there was nothing spilled when he picked himself up. Nothing had shattered. He brushed himself off, tucking his phone into his pants pocket. Then he listened to see if that imposter was nearby – when he heard nothing, he exhaled heavily, then went to go sit near the back wall. He had just fully seated himself when he heard it – an alarm that started off faintly, then grew louder in volume. He realized it was moving at a strange pace.

First it was from far away, then moved through the air with a steady pace, until he realized it was a voice. And the sound was his name.

" **aaaaaaaannn** _NNNNNJJJJJJJIIIIIIIII_!"

"Oh, thank God," Sanji said with a gratified air, quickly leaving the wall and heading for the door. He opened it with a grateful expression, seeing that Law was no where in sight. Cautiously, he ventured out from the storeroom and then headed in the direction of the voice. It was coming from outside, so Sanji hastily moved in that direction.

" _Luffy_!" he shouted, pushing the door out and looking to see the younger man careening his way with a delighted expression. But Sanji stopped short with a low gasp, putting the brakes on. He stumbled, lunging backward at a near 90 degree angle to avoid the happy hug of the other man. Once he hit the deck, he lunged back to his feet as Luffy sailed through the air with a surprised expression, then crashed into the railing nearby, rubbery limbs retracting to smack him.

Sanji stared in shock at this Luffy – this one in a printed blue flower shirt and cuffed jeans, straw sandals and with a massive scar over his thin chest. He was much skinnier than the one Sanji knew, and rangier, and – there was something else about him that didn't scream familiarity with Sanji. He cautiously eased back to the doorway, watching as Luffy climbed back to his feet with a quiet 'hup!' and brushed himself off before looking back at Sanji with an expression of childlike glee.

"BREAKFAST!" he howled. "I'm HUNGRY! IS IT READY?"

Sanji looked at him with wide eyes, mouth dropping open. Then he reached for the door handle once more, Luffy stalking towards him with a determined expression.

"Yo ho ho ho, good morning, Sanji darling! You're looking mighty fetching, today!" came a voice high above his head, and Sanji looked upward to seeing the skeleton face leering down at him, tight black curls dangling just inches from his face. Sanji's face paled, his mouth opened even wider with a building scream. "What sort of panties go with those pants?"

"I'm not wearing any!" Sanji exclaimed with disgust, zipping away from the skeleton's tall frame, gaping up at his height with frightened awe.

"Oh? No panties, today? True freedom for men, then?"

"I mean, I'm not wearing women's undergarments! What the hell? What is this? _What are you_?"

"Ho ho hoho! I'm me! I'm Brook, I'm a skeleton! No skin for me, either. I lost it a long time ago! Thank you for asking!"

"I didn't ask that!"

"Sanji, I'm hungry," Luffy whispered in his ear, standing much too close to him. Sanji clapped a hand over his ear and scooted out from the boy, nearly tripping over the newest obstacle in his path.

"Ow! Sanji! You asshole! How could you miss me? I'm standing right in front of you!"

Sanji looked down at the reindeer that cursed at him, picking himself up from the floor. His blue and pink hat clashed with his yellow tank top and camoflauged shorts. Sanji's eyes widened once more, unsure of who this person was.

"It's okay, Chopper, Sanji's still waking up!" Luffy exclaimed. "Look at those eyes! Sanji, were you up all night again? looking at those naughty magazines?"

"Ho ho ho ho! _Sanji_!"

"You're going to go blind!" Chopper whispered in concern.

"NO!" Sanji shouted, then turned and ran for the back once more, much to the confused expressions of the trio he left behind.

"I'm pretty sure that's his guilty conscience speaking for him," Luffy said, arms crossed over his chest, head tilted.

"Oh, that Sanji, he's certainly a lonely man after denying himself a wife," Chopper said with a sad expression.

"So…no breakfast? I'm wasting away, here. Oh, but I already did," Brook said, looking down at himself, exposing his ribs with a brush of his bony fingers against his shirt.

"He might be an imposter," came the voice behind them, Chopper and Brook shrieking minutely before hiding behind Luffy.

"Ah! Tra-guy! Hmm? Imposter?" Luffy asked, picking his nose as Law frowned down at him with disgust.

"He has been behaving strangely from the moment he woke up this morning. And he is carrying an odd device, relying on it to tell him what to do. It might be a trap. Perhaps he hasn't escaped from his family, just yet," Law said seriously. "They are probably using that contraption to control him from a distance."

Luffy's face turned determined. "Then we shall set him free. AGAIN. Brook, Chopper! You know what to do!"

"Right!" they said in unison, standing at attention.

Then Chopper frowned. "Are we going to give chase? Or are we in charge of making breakfast, again?"

"I get to hold the spatula, this time!" Brook insisted.

"Wait, you're making breakfast? Can I help?" Luffy asked, whipping his head around.

"NO!" both of them shouted. " _We're_ going to do it!"

"I burned the kitchen down ONE TIME, and you guys won't let it go!"

Law turned away with a suffering expression as Luffy, Chopper and Brook began arguing amongst themselves in who was going to make breakfast, losing track of what they were going to do seconds earlier.

Meanwhile, Sanji peered around the corner, hearing the trio still arguing about making breakfast. He inched towards the doorway, intending on hiding himself back into the storeroom until he could figure out what to do. But before he could, a large figured dropped down in front of him with a low snarl, and Sanji automatically jerked back and shrieked. The sound carried out over the boat deck with such volume that it seemed to echo over the water, and he grew embarrassed for himself as he cut the sound short.

"Wow, Sanji bro, what the hell was that? I know some of my clothing choices offend you from time to time, but this is the first time you've made such a big deal out of it," Franky said, massive hands on his narrow hips as Sanji looked at him with consternation.

His eye was wide as he took in the mechanical arms, the wide shoulders, the fake nose; the blue hair standing at attention in a creative Mohawk looked impossibly shaped. He was wearing blue dip dyed Speedos. The various scars the rippled over muscle and flesh. The thigh high steel…boots? Legs – Sanji couldn't even fathom what that was about. How was this man even alive after all of this…modifying? Was he a man? He looked – even though he didn't want to – but he looked for the bulge in those Speedos. There wasn't any.

Sanji's nose wrinkled and his lip curled. He held all his limbs close to him because he felt he would touch the half man, half…whatever he was, accidentally. But then he grew fascinated, because was the man half human? So was that real skin, or fake skin? Was his skeleton composed of Terminator-like metal?

"Huh? Sanji?" Franky repeated, looking down at the man with a questioning tilt of his head.

" _Are you real_?" Sanji whispered, reaching out and poking his chest with an awestruck expression, then flattening his palm against the massive display of washboard abs.

"AYEEEEEE! What are you doing?" Franky shrieked, retreating backwards.

"Is that real flesh?" Sanji asked, walking after him, utterly mystified. "Are you a real person? How is this possible?"

"LUFFFFFY! Sanji's being weird!" Franky hollered. "He's _touching_ me!"

"Hands off Franky, asshole!" Chopper's voice came from somewhere above – or around. Sanji wasn't sure where, because sound seemed to carry on these waters.

"Yo ho ho hoho! Frisky Sanji!" Brook laughed, from somewhere in the distance.

"Sanji! You know how self conscious Franky gets!" Luffy scolded, then laughed.

Sanji retreated, then hurried back into the kitchen, panting tightly. Once inside, he realized he was looking at Nami and Robin, both of whom looked back at him with puzzled expressions, seated at the table. But they weren't the women he was familiar with – Robin had shorter hair at the bar, last night. Nami wasn't wearing much of anything, save for an ill-fitting bra-top and too low, too short jean shorts. Just the sight of their exposed chests in tightly fitted shirts made him embarrassed to look their way. He'd seen Nami in enough tight and exposing clothing before, but nothing like this.

He wondered if they'd even _finished_ dressing.

"Sanji, dear, what's up? What's with that face?" Nami asked him, lowering her newspaper while Robin looked at him with curiosity. "And what are you wearing?"

Sanji looked down at himself. He was wearing his favorite pair of jeans that were rolled to expose his ankles, his Oxfords bright and shiny. He also wore a black vest with a white shirt, a bowtie tied neatly at his collar. Over that was a black casual blazer, but the sleeves were rolled mid-forearm.

"Ah…this. This…where are _your_ clothes? For the love of God, woman, your bosoms are going to sag to your thighs if you don't support them properly," he said, wincing as he covered his eyes, unsure of where to look.

When he heard Robin's strangled giggle, he opened his fingers to see Nami striding over to him, rolling up the newspaper with one hand as her face reddened with fury. He turned and ran out from the area, hearing her give chase. He almost crashed into Franky, but he stumbled over Chopper once more, slammed against Brook, who knocked over Luffy, who went rolling for the wall. Once he hit that, he emitted a loud cry of surprise, and Ussop shrieked from somewhere nearby.

"WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!"

To which Franky prepared for battle, Chopper ended up screaming from the floor in a panic, Brook was quick to get back to his feet, running for the lawn, and Nami was screaming at all of them that this wasn't true. Luffy laughed wildly.

Sanji raced away from them, panting tightly. His mind was in a panic. Everything was so different, and these people weren't his friends at all.

Luffy sat up from the floor, watching as Nami chased after the other man. It was obvious to the group watching that Sanji was unfamiliar with the ship. His expression was full of panic and surprise, and he wasn't even perving out on the woman with her bountiful chest and obvious intention. He ran in different directions, lunged and spun around the woman, then ran down the stairs, leading her on a grand chase. Once he realized he was cornered, he covered his head with his arms as Nami hit him with the newspaper.

"What's up with Sanji?" Luffy asked curiously. "Why is he behaving so weird?"

"I don't know, Luffy bro."

"Law said he was being weird ever since he woke up," Chopper said, tilting his head. "And I've never seen those clothes, before. Maybe he was kidnapped in the middle of the night and he was returned brainwashed."

"That's a _very_ good explanation for all this, Chopper," Brook said, rubbing his chin.

"There were no other visitors to this ship," Law said, startling all of them. Chopper shrieked and darted behind Franky, Brook taking position behind Luffy, and Franky lifting an arm just to see the other man standing nearby. "He came out from the kitchen like that."

"Do you think his family did this to him? Maybe he's so traumatized by them that he had a mental breakdown," Robin suggested, joining them. "We need to treat this situation delicately."

"But most importantly, _when are we going to eat_?" Luffy complained, rising to his feet and walking over to the railing. "SANJI! I'M HUNGRY! I'M STARVING TO DEATH! DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE?"

"Make your own breakfast! You have hands!" came the shout.

Most of the group gasped and reacted with horror, drawing away from the boy that froze in reaction. Even Law reacted with a surprised expression.

" _That's not Sanji_!" Franky exclaimed.

"Sanji's a zombie!" Chopper cried.

"I'm starving to death as well, but you don't see me complaining over it, ho ho ho!" Brook tittered, then looked down at himself. "Oh, wait, I'm already dead!"

"Oh my," Robin murmured with some concern.

Sure enough, Luffy stepped atop of the railing with one foot, a tight expression to his face. "That's not Sanji. I'm afraid he's been body-snatched. He's definitely an imposter. Someone did this to him! This is unacceptable – for an enemy to steal off with my friend, my cook - ! They've declared war on my own ship! Someone will pay for this! It's bad enough that they tried to marry him off, but to do this? This is wrong! The wrongest of all wrongs! And I will not stand here and let it happen!"

Nami shielded her eyes with one hand, looking up at them as Sanji looked up as well, lowering his hands to his sides. "What's going on, up there? Luffy has that look to his face, again."

"What was he saying?" Sanji asked. "I was too busy being beaten to hear."

"Something about you being an imposter."

"This entire _world_ is an imposter," Sanji said.

Nami looked back at him with concern. "Well, you _are_ acting differently. You are dressed funny. And I've never heard you shriek like that, before. And you're not dying of blood loss. So you just might be an imposter."

"Why would I do all that?" Sanji asked her incredulously, rising to stand, brushing himself off.

"Because that's just you," Nami said, frowning at him. Once she realized her friends were moving up to the railing in a battle formation, she crossed her arms over her abundant chest, newspaper still clutched in one hand. "Oh. Looks like they're going to attack."

" _Me_?" Sanji asked, noting that Franky was pointing what looked like a canon in his arm their way. Chopper had changed from little reindeer to a massive humanoid with a hulking figure – Brook had his rapier out, waving in the air. Luffy had one arm to his mouth, steaming – Robin had her arms crossed over her chest. Next to her, Law was just frowning down at them, not moving.

"Nami! Get away from him! He's an imposter!" Luffy shouted at her.

Nami snorted, hands on her hips. "What are you talking about? Don't be stupid!"

"He's willing to let me starve!"

Nami looked back at Sanji with a concerned expression. "Were you being serious about that?"

"He can make his own meal," Sanji said with bewilderment. "I don't cook for him, everyday."

"Sanji, you're _our_ _cook_. Why wouldn't you?" she asked curiously, brushing her bangs out of her face as a rumble of sound caught her attention. She looked over, realizing that they were in the midst of charging. Arms sprung out from the deck and latched onto Sanji's feet and legs, causing him to look down with alarm. Fear and terror caused his eyes to widen and his face to pale.

She looked back at him, and then felt for his distress. She lunged in front of him, arms stretched out to her sides and a fierce expression on her face.

"STOP IT! All of you!" she shouted, causing Luffy to switch direction. He slammed into the wheel with a garbled sound, limbs stretching out around him; Chopper screeched to a stop in front of her, Brook stumbling over him. Franky lowered his arm, and Robin uncrossed her arms with a surprised blink. "Obviously, something is wrong, here. He's not threatening us in any way. He's just…behaving oddly. For you to lunge out to attack just because he thinks he shouldn't cook for us – "

"That's why, Nami!" Luffy shouted. "Sanji would never say that to us!"

"Why should i? You guys are in charge of your own life! You cook your own meals!" Sanji exclaimed, watching as the arms disappeared around him. "You have your own homes!"

"SEE? SANJI WOULD NEVER SAY THAT!"

"Sanji hates to see people starving!" Chopper insisted. "Move aside!"

"It is unusual," Robin agreed.

"All of you are ridiculous! This is our friend! He is obviously affected by what happened, back there, give him a few days to recoup!" Nami insisted, hands on her slim hips. "He probably just had a breakdown! Wouldn't you agree, to those conditions he'd just left?"

All of them, save for Robin, grumbled. Beyond them, still standing on the back deck, Law snorted.

"Okay then! That settles it! No attacking Sanji until we figure out what's wrong with him!" Nami declared. She looked back at him. "Come, now. Let's go get some rest. I'm sure after you take a few moments to yourself, you'll wake up yourself, again. We can handle the kitchen."

Sanji stared at the bewildered faces that stared back at him. "Uh, okay. Sure."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two –

Sanji stared up at the sky. He felt so sick that movement of his own felt like a death sentence. He was lying near the railing on his back, where all he had to do was roll over and puke into the sea if he had to. His eyes felt swollen, his tongue dry, and his throat was raw, and his stomach just seemed to continue rebelling against him. It had to be a combination of a bad hangover and motion sickness.

The weather was beautiful – not too warm, too cold, either. He could lay there comfortably in his jeans, vest and shirt without the threat of sweat. Next to him, Chopper was humming as he had a bunch of vials around him, a thick tome in front of him. He would play with a few things, record something in the book, then look at him with concern. Beyond him, Luffy and Ussop were playing tag, Nami and Robin were sunning themselves, Brook was carrying a cheerful tune with a violin, and Franky was working on something that looked like a canon. The sounds they all made carried over the water, which splashed against the ship as it continued moving through the waves – there was no land in sight.

Every once in a while, Luffy would cry out for food, and everyone looked at Sanji expectantly, but he didn't want to move.

He was too confused, too sick and too lost to do anything but stare up at the sky.

"Try this, Sanji," Chopper then said, holding up a glass cup with what looked like tea leaves floating in it. "This will assist with your motion sickness."

"I don't think so," Sanji said crossly, hand over his eyes. "Just looking at it is making me sick."

"I promise you, it'll help. Don't refuse my care. Otherwise, I'll have someone hold you down and I'll pour it down your throat," Chopper said menacingly.

Sanji looked at him between his fingers, then turned away, lunging between the pillars of the railing to heave over the waters below.

"SIXTEEN!" Ussop cried. "I WIN!"

"NOT UH!" Luffy shouted. "He's not actually puking!"

"Stop it, you bastards!" Chopper screamed back at them. "Don't make plight of his situation!"

"Sanji, are you dead yet?" Brook asked in mid-tune. "Because if that's the outfit you choose to die in, it's a rather pitiful one. No one can take you seriously with you looking like that."

"What are you talking about, Brook?" Nami asked, lifting her sunglasses. "Look at your outfit!"

"Show me your panties, dancing queen!"

"Ugh, NO!"

Sanji hung there for a few moments, watching the dark blue waters crash up against the hull of the ship. The water looked intimidating. Who knew what lurked in those depths? The creatures breaking the surface in the distance almost looked like whales, but Luffy kept shouting that they were sea pigs, instead. So when Sanji tried to imagine whale-like pigs swimming through the water, his imagination didn't stretch that way.

He expected dolphins, Great White Sharks, the fabled Kraken – nothing fantastic.

"I think I'm hungover," he moaned. "Why didn't anyone tell me to stop drinking? Why did I even think I could hang with Nami and …wait. Where's Zoro?"

"We're on our way to pick him up," Chopper said cheerfully, holding up his cup once more. "He wanted to train with the samurai for a few weeks, learn their secrets. After we picked Law up from his crew, we're supposed to meet Zoro on Windmill Island."

All of this flew over Sanji's head. He rested his cheek against the deck, wanting to be home with his boyfriend. Did Law know he was gone? Was the Sanji of this world with him?

Law better not touch him. He _better_ have noticed a difference in personality. If Sanji found out that Law was molesting this Sanji of this world, Sanji was going to be pissed. It was still cheating if it were an alternate universe Sanji.

With a growl, he lifted his head and looked around for this world's Law. Somehow, the man was taking a nap sitting up near the soldier's dock, holding onto his sword for support.

"Chopper. Tell me everything," he said, slowly pushing himself to sit. "Who are you people?"

"What do you mean? You're Sanji, I'm Tony-Tony Chopper," was the answer.

"I'm sorry, this is really confusing. But while I'm familiar with all of you, this isn't what I'm used to," Sanji said with much difficulty. "Last night, I was out eating and drinking with – you guys, but a different…everyone was different."

"What do you mean, Sanji? We didn't drink last night. We don't do that," Chopper said.

"So, um… there's this situation. I'm not…from here," Sanji said slowly, using his fingers to indicate himself, then point down at the deck.

Chopper looked in the direction he pointed at, then at him with a tilted head. "No, you're from the North Blue. Your family was royalty that traveled the seas, and after you defeated your father and your brothers – "

"Whom I don't claim in any way."

"Of course! Why should you? They were an awful bunch! Your brothers were so terrible to you!"

"Yes they were!" Sanji agreed with a huff. Just the thought of his quadruplet brothers was enough to make him sick, his brainwashed sister with her Electra complex adding into the mix. He refused to think of his father, the abusive bastard. It took him years to get to this point in life, but alcohol had been a bad problem that developed as result of it. That was another thing he didn't want to think about, either. "I was so happy that once I started dating – er, well, I'm just…glad I lost contact with them."

"You're dating, Sanji? Who is it?"

Sanji waved it off. "N-no one. Um. Anyway. So, I'm not from here. This is…not my reality. I mean. I _guess_. I don't know how I got here but I can't be here. I need to go home. I have…there's people who are expecting me to be there."

"Oh? Another us?" Chopper asked curiously.

"Yes."

"That sounds so fascinating! What are we like?"

Sanji cleared his throat nervously. "Not like this."

"Is that why you can't fit in, right now?"

"Yes."

Chopper looked at him with concern. "Well, I'm not sure how to do this, Sanji. I don't know how to feel about it. What happened when you woke up this morning?"

Sanji thought about the kitchen. Then the apples he'd seen. So when he mentioned them, Chopper stood and walked off. He ended up dodging Luffy and Ussop's hands, and then Sanji watched with dismay as the reindeer joined in with the games, chasing the pair with outrage. Nami screamed at them to quiet down, and Franky yelled out with protest as they clamored over the canon.

Sanji slumped onto the deck with exhaustion. He looked at the cup Chopper had been trying to give him. His stomach lurched at the thought of having that stuff in there, when it could hold nothing at the moment. But then again, he thought about all the shots he'd had, the beer he'd drank, and suddenly he didn't feel good all over again.

He thought of last night when his boyfriend looked at him with irritation, fist balled on the countertop. 'You're not going to vomit all over me again, are you?'

Sanji had laughed and laid over his lap, too drunk to sit steady.

'Wow, he's already smashed,' Nami said with concern, beer mug empty.

'Get him another one, he'll pass right out,' Zoro said, finishing off his own.

'True friends make you drink until you die,' Ussop commented sarcastically.

'Another round!' Shachi cried, waving his money in the air.

'Another round!' Nami shouted. 'Fireball me!'

'Another round!' Sanji cried, but the words didn't come out right. When he looked at Law, the man looked pissed and uncomfortable, but Sanji thought that Law was just spoiling the fun with his attitude. Plus he kept looking over Sanji's head, and Sanji didn't feel good about it, because he knew who he was looking at.

'If you're going to spew, spew into this,' Ussop said, snickering as he passed him a folded paper cup from his pocket.

'You waited for this moment all night, didn't you?' Zoro asked him.

"My friends suck!" Sanji said to himself, against the deck of the ship. "You were supposed to cut me off, Law!"

"What?"

Sanji sat up with a start, regretting it immediately as his head spun, and bile coated his tongue. The other man stood in front of him, sword on his shoulder as he looked down at him with an expression of disgust.

" _Here_ ," he said, pointing at his own chin.

When Sanji wiped his face, he was disgusted to feel chunks there. He grew embarrassed immediately. "I don't even know what it was I ate, last night."

"You cooked us some sort of fish dinner. But that didn't look anything like it."

"Don't study my vomit chunks."

"Where is your doctor?" Law asked impatiently, then spotted the reindeer running about with a happy laugh. "This crew is insane. You think I'd be used to it, by now."

"Babe – I MEAN, YOU!" Sanji corrected himself hastily, scrambling to somehow hide the endearment behind his hands. But Law looked at him with such startled action that Sanji felt his face turn beet red. "NEVER MIND I SAID THAT. Tell me what happened last night."

"After you re-boarded the Sunny with supplies, Mr Blackleg, you prepared dinner. We set sail shortly after mid afternoon. By the time you served it, it was nearly mid-evening. It was how it is, now. Loud and chaotic. Nobody wants to discuss what happened because you implicitly instructed all of us not to mention what had happened with your family," Law said. Even his voice was different from Sanji's Law. It was lower, angrier, and when he spoke of the crew, there was much irritation in it.

Sanji stared up at him with fascination, and realized that even if this one wore similar skin as his boyfriend, the differences were immense. This one was at least fifty pounds less than his boyfriend – there seemed to be no meat to him. His arms and legs looked like they belonged to a teenage boy. But his face was harsher, and there were light splotches of white all over his exposed skin. His fingers were discolored, as if he'd stuffed them into a can of paint, with patches of white on his neck and over one cheek. When Law realized that Sanji was staring at these, he immediately grew self conscious and glared at him for it.

" _What_ , Mr Blackleg?"

"N-nothing. Just…"

"Do you find my deformities so fucking fascinating?"

"No, I just…you remind me of someone. I really miss him, right now."

"Was he splotchy, too?"

Uncomfortably, Sanji didn't know what to say. He felt bad for staring, and he felt bad for not knowing what to say. He looked down at his hands.

"No."

"Then if you find it revolting, don't look at me."

"I didn't say that - !"

"Mr Tony! Your crewmate is in need of your assistance!" Law barked out over the noise, Chopper dashing away from the fun to run into the kitchen. Law then muttered to himself as he strode away from the noise, heading for the second third level deck, "Just a few more weeks. A few more weeks…"

Sanji looked after him with consternation, then rose to his feet. Hand over his stomach, he leaned over the railing trying not to be sick. Looking down into the waters, he saw movement just beneath the waves. It startled him, thinking that they were dolphins. The shapes were slightly reddish, scales glinting – the length of it suggested a shark-like creature. But Sanji had never been on the ocean – he hadn't really ridden a ship, and he had no idea what sea creatures looked like from above. So completely fascinated with what was lurking underneath the surface, he leaned far over the railing for a better glimpse of the creatures that were there.

There was a slip of sound, and a gush of water that sprayed over him – movement caught his eye, and he looked up just in time to see a massive, seahorse-shaped creature with red and orange scales looking at him. Its wide set eyes blinked three lids at him, tubular mouth curling inward like a snail retracting back into his shell. Then teeth emerged, and it gave a wild scream of deafening quality, Sanji freezing in place as he gaped at it.

A brilliant blue flash of light burst around him, and suddenly the sea creature was in pieces, and he was hauled off the railing like he was nothing.

 _Oh, he's strong, too_ , he thought with a shiver, looking at Law with delight. But the man was looking at him with horror, and his arm was outstretched, and it took Sanji a few moments to realize that something was utterly wrong.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHA! KID SANJI!" Luffy cried with laughter.

"EVERYONE! Inside! Before we're all shrunk!" Nami called out patiently, Robin and Franky moving around to pull up metal enforced tarps over the Sunny's railing to protect them. Around the ship were similar screams of moving creatures, and Law was stalking after the others with Sanji swinging in front of him.

"What happened?" he asked in bewilderment, then realized how young his voice was. When he looked at himself, his clothes were falling off. Then he realized that his limbs were short. When he touched himself, he realized that he wasn't an adult, anymore. He gave a shrill scream of dismay, Law giving a sound of consternation as he leaned as far from the sound as possible.

"Here, damn it," he said, tossing Sanji towards the trio that looked up at Sanji with utter delight.

"He's so SMOL," Luffy said with delight, hugging him tightly.

"SMOL Sanji!" Chopper cried, reaching up to hug him as well.

"HAHAHAHA! Look at his knees!" Ussop yelled, poking Sanji in the knee.

Sanji felt his eyes well up with tears and indignant action. Looking down at himself, he realized he was in the single digits of age. He wasn't sure when, he needed a mirror, but he definitely wanted to cry. Then he patted his pants pockets with frantic action, and retrieved the cellphone. It was still at 97%. He locked it quickly and held it tightly within both hands, looking up at Luffy, Chopper and Ussop with scared action. His shirt hem and vest pooled around his feet as his pants were discarded behind him, his shoes near the railing.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO ME?" he screamed with dismay.

"You were hit by a water beast that turns grown men into children, rendering them easier for the creature to eat," Robin said to him patiently, sitting on her knees before him. She tucked his hair behind his ears, looking at him with affection. "They come around, sometimes. The effect will wear off within a few hours. I was wondering what it was you were looking at so intently."

"Sanji! Up! Up!" Luffy commanded, hands out to him. "Come to poopa Luffy!"

Sanji stared up at him with revulsion, then walked away from him. A couple of steps away, he paused in place. His eyes turned large with tears, and he sniffled. Everyone in the room quieted and stared at him with wide eyed consternation. When he realized how focused they were on him, he spun in place, glaring at them.

"STOP LOOKING AT ME."

"Let it out," Luffy said gently, crouching in front of him. "Let it out, Smol Sanji. Cry into my chest, buddy."

"No, mine," Ussop said, pushing him aside, arms out. "Come to uncle Ussop, and I'll share with you all grand tales of my adventures as God Ussop!"

"No, come to grandfather Brook, Sanji. Come sit on my lap. Let me serenade you with lullabies from my youth!"

"Come to me, precious baby, and let me find out what else is in your pockets," Nami cooed, arms open wide.

Sanji stared at all of them with disgust, then turned and stomped off towards the storeroom. He slammed the door hard behind him, and locked it. He sniffled, wiped his eyes, and looked at his phone. Still no service. He tried not to cry, but he had no control over his emotions as a child.

"I wanna go home!" he cried. "Where am I? FIND ME, Booface, you fucking bastard! You left me at the bar! I hate you! I don't know where I am!"

At the knocking on the door, he quieted. From the bottom of the door, a couple of hand rolled cigarettes were pushed in, as well as a lighter. He sniffled, then glared at the rubbery hand that pointed at them repeatedly.

"Smol Sanji!" came Luffy's loud whisper. "When you're done, can you make me a snack?"

" _LUFFY_!" Nami shrieked, hitting him. "Enough! Obviously, Sanji's in distress! Leave him alone!"

"Smol Sanji, hang in there! it'll only be a few hours!" Chopper said encouragingly.

"Smol Sanji! Don't smoke those! You're too young!" Ussop cried.

"Once upon a time, there were two young boys! One named David, the other named Sam! Sam went a-walkin' and when he didn't come back, David set out and found his neck snapped - !"

"WHAT KIND OF LULLABY IS THAT?"

"the moral of the story? Don't venture out without your mother's permission, o ho ho ho ho!"

" _I wanna go home_!" Sanji cried.

: :

A couple of hours later, Sanji emerged from the storeroom. Luffy, Chopper and Ussop had passed out in a pile in front of the door. He carefully crawled around them, phone held tightly in one hand, then hurried towards the bar counter where he'd woken up hours earlier. Looking over it, he realized that the apples and notes were missing. The candle was put back in a hutch nearby, and when he looked around himself, he spotted the ladder nearby. With another look at the trio passed out, Sanji shifted away from the counter, and climbed it. Emerging onto the deck, Sanji looked around himself. Then scrambled onto the wood, looking around. The afternoon sun hung directly overhead, and he shielded his eyes from it, then lifted his phone up.

Still no service. But the percentage was now 93%.

"No!" he exclaimed. He turned off the WiFi option, then locked it into Airplane mode. Hugging it to his chest, he looked around himself. The clouds in the distance were gaining them, and the sails fluttered with massive complaint around the mast. Down below, Nami was directing Law and Franky into dropping the anchor, and to close up the sails. Robin stood next to her, and suddenly turned and looked up at Sanji with a vague smile. Sanji ducked, and hid from that face of hers, intending on returning to the kitchen when arms sprouted up around him, hands waving.

"Argh! So creepy!" he yelled in fright, avoiding those playfully tickling fingers.

"Smol Sanji, are you still small?" Franky bellowed from below.

"I believe the word is 'duh', Franky," Nami said impatiently. "Sanji! Get down from there! go back into the kitchen! Those water beasts are still around! They can smell you!"

"Did anybody figure out what happened to me, yet?" he asked instead, peering over the rooftop edge. "Because I need to get home as soon as possible."

"Chopper and Robin are working on it!" Nami called back.

Sanji frowned because Chopper was napping, and Robin was just standing there with a smile on her face. "No, they're not! I want to go home!"

"Why would you -?" Nami quieted as Robin elbowed her, then she said, "Oh, right. Sanji, they're doing the best they can! Now, go back inside!"

"Where's my room?"

"Come into the kitchen, and I'll bring you there," Nami said, walking towards the door. Sanji waited a few moments, looking at the other three, then at the horizon. The wind was picking up, and he could hear thunder in the distance. It made him nervous. But he followed Nami's instructions.

Nami was waiting for him as he climbed carefully down the ladder, dropping to the floor a few rungs up. Then she gushed over him, reaching out to pinch his cheek, ruffle his hair.

"Stop that!" he snapped at her, causing her to look at him with surprise.

"You always want me touching you!"

"Well, I don't, now. I'm taken."

She laughed. "You are so cute! 'Taken' by whom? You didn't go through with your wedding! Did you promise yourself to someone else?"

"Yes," Sanji said nervously.

'Oh? Are we invited to the wedding?"

"Yes, only friends will be invited. That's our family."

Nami stared at him for a few moments, unsure of whether or not to continue this game. Then she decided not to, because Smol Sanji was staring up at her with a frown.

"Okay," she said with a shrug, leading the way. Sanji looked around himself, noting the precautions being taken as the small group prepared for the storm. Franky and Law stared at him with frowns as he passed by, and he felt self conscious – and, well, _small_ – as he hurried past them. Nami walked into the first floor doorway, then reacted with an annoyed noise, covering her nose with one hand.

"Pee- _you_!" she exclaimed. "You men stink! Oh, look at the laundry that's piled up – maybe when you get bigger, you can finish that. Oh, and don't forget, you promised to clean the aquarium when you were able."

"What? Why should I do other people's laundry?" Sanji asked with mystification, looking at the big pile of clothes lying near the lockets. He looked around the room with revulsion. The beds were wooden bunkbeds – Nami pointed out his. Sanji stared down at the twin sized bed with disgust – he and Law shared a king-sized bed because they were both travelers that wound up on opposite ends of the mattress, and to think that he'd be sleeping in this _coffin_ \- !

"Because you do a lot of things around here, dear," Nami said, looking back at him. "Not only do you cook, but you clean, keep the ship in order. You make sure all the chores are done – "

"It sounds like I'm a slave!" Sanji exclaimed with horror.

"We paid for you, fair and square," Nami said, teasing. But once she realized that Sanji did not see it as 'teasing' she felt bad. She then remembered what Sanji's family situation was. And then she felt terrible.

She turned away, gut churning with violent guilt. She thought of everything that Sanji did for the crew – up early to cook, clean, attend to all their needs, doing their laundry, tending to the gardens, and all the little stuff in between – and felt horrid. Yes, the man volunteered to do it all himself – he knew it would be done, then – but to think about it now, he was probably only doing it to keep their positive attention…

She looked at the pile of laundry on the floor. Mens' underwear, shorts, shirts, socks, hat wear – what looked like Law's feathered sweater with Chopper's handprints all over it - made up a majority of the pile. Someone had even thrown their sheets down onto it. What was disgusting was how stiff the wad looked.

"Ugh, this room makes me think we're transporting zoo animals!" she exclaimed. She walked up to the lockers, and found his. "Here's your things."

"That's…where my closet?"

"This is it."

Sanji stared in horror at the slim design. There were coats and shirts hanging inside, folded laundry stacked neatly at the bottom, shoes stuffed into a container – but it was nothing like the walk-in closet he had at home. Hand to his chest, he wondered if that was all he was doomed to wear for the rest of his time here. He missed all his name brand things already.

Nami almost laughed at his expression, shutting the locket tight. "Maybe you can find something more comfortable to wear?"

"I…want to go home. I'd really like to know how to do that."

"It might take some time, Sanji. You might as well as get settled here, for the time being," she said, walking towards the door. "Take a nap."

"In _that_?" Sanji asked skeptically, looking at his bed once more. Walking over to the bunk beds, he reached up to pull himself up and looked down inside. He touched the sheets and pillow, and retracted his hand with a slight sniffle. They weren't even the thousand count sheets that he liked.

Nami watched his actions with a bewildered expression. Even as a child, Sanji had all the expressions she was familiar with, but this man wasn't the man she knew at all. It was a feeling when she looked at him, when he looked at all of them. There was something a little more vulnerable to his features than her Sanji – the way he carried himself, looking at the device and at them with an expression of dismay. She believed something had happened, but she didn't understand what. Robin was analyzing the apples he'd bought from the island the day before, but hadn't come to any answers just yet. Chopper had run some tests, but neither of them were sure of what they were.

His style of dress was so much different from what she was used to – she'd never, in all her years of knowing the man, seen him in a bowtie. Or move so stiffly. Or look so bloated.

That was the word – the man was bloated. He said he was drinking the night before, so maybe that was it, but this Sanji was definitely different from the Sanji she knew. His cheeks were fuller, his neck thicker, and his eyes didn't have that wide, sunken in look caused by his careful eating. Nami was mystified by the entire thing – she hoped that the pair were able to come up with something, soon.

"I want to go home," he moped, leaning against the bed. "I'm sure La – I'm sure people are looking for me."

"Who?"

"My friends."

"Us in your world?"

"Yes," Sanji said, looking at his phone. "I can't call them. I don't have service."

"What is that?" Nami asked, venturing close.

"It's my cellphone. It's an iphone SE6. All of us have an iPhone, except for Zoro, he's got this dumbass Samsung Galaxy 9, and it's so lame."

"What does it do?"

"It stores pictures, we can send messages to each other, watch Youtube – "

"What's a 'Youtube'?" she asked curiously, looking over the bed at him.

"It's an internet website that plays all sorts of things," Sanji told her.

"It's a magical book?"

Sanji stared at her for a few moments, then said, "Yes. It's a magical book. I need it to call my friends, though. I'm sure they're looking for me."

"Like a den-den mushi?" she asked.

"What's a…?"

"This," she said, moving to his locker and pulling out a sleeping snail. Sanji stared at it with horror, wondering how that living thing could be used to call out on. When she detached the receiver from it, the snail's eyes opened with a 'Gotchak.'

"EW."

"What do you mean, 'ew'?" Nami asked, hanging up, setting the den-den mushi on the top slehf of his locker. Then tittered. "It's time for you to get dressed, dear."

Sanji looked down at himself, realizing he'd regained his adult form. He crouched down to hide his underwear from her with an embarrassed action. Nami then turned away from the locker and walked some feet away, her back to him while he hurried over, scrambling for something comfortable to wear. He found some shorts and struggled to put them on – horrified that they didn't fit.

"How is this possible?" he asked, struggling to pull the waist up over his thighs. "There's no way!"

"To be honest, you and our Sanji are a little…different from each other," Nami said, hearing the struggle behind her.

"I drink too much, yes, I know! And maybe I sample too much of my stuff! I don't smoke enough," Sanji complained, throwing the shorts aside and looking for something else. "I know I said a thousand times that I'm going to lose weight, but why should I when I'm happy in my relationship, and my partner likes me the way I am? Where's Zoro's locker? Never mind. Found it."

"Who's your partner?" Nami asked curiously, almost turning to look at him and then catching herself.

"Oh, wow, these are tight, too, but if I suck it in - ! _There_." Sanji felt miserable. "Ugh."

"Who's - ?"

"The point is, I'm taken," Sanji said, fluffing out his shirt. "I swear, this is only alcohol weight. I _was_ going back to AA. I wanted to be sober for my wedding – "

"You're getting married?" Nami asked, whirling to look at him.

"Well, sort of," Sanji confessed awkwardly. "The intention is there. I just…I was told I had to be sober for at least a year before…it came to that."

Nami looked at him, bewildered.

"It's a long story. I'm surprised he – that my partner is still there. I put him – er, through a lot, and…it's my own fault. That's why I need to get back home. Whatever happened last night, it can be fixed."

Nami stared at him in silence for a few moments. " _Him_. You said 'him'. 'He'."

"Please don't tell anyone," Sanji said tightly. "I have a feeling it's not very accepted, here."

"It _is_ unusual. It's greatly unusual because of your woman problems – but…okay. _Okay_. You're not…our Sanji, you're…someone else. _So_. It's not that unusual," she said, stuttering slightly. But she continued to stare at him. "So…it's someone. One of us. Zoro."

Sanji fidgeted with his borrowed shorts. "I don't want to talk about it. It's complicated. But I _am_ dedicated to one person. This is why the wedding was set the way it was, because…I make problems for myself. I shouldn't say that. I mean, the _engagement_. I guess when it happens, it'll… well, I'm expecting it, soon. When I'm sober. Sober- _er_. I expect us to be engaged. Soon. I know he'll ask when I'm a year sober."

Nami looked at him with confusion, unsure how to take the desperate rambling. "Oh. Okay."

"Nami, we're prepared," Robin said from the doorway, looking at them with her hands at her sides. Then she reached out and caught the pair of pants that her arms carried over from the deck, and tossed them to Sanji. Sanji took them gratefully, climbing out of Zoro's shorts and pulling on his pants with a sigh of relief.

"Luffy and the others are awake, and they are hungry," she told Sanji.

"Tell them to get their own snacks," Sanji said with a mystified expression. "Why should I do it? What's wrong with their hands?"

"You nimrod," Nami exclaimed, looking at him. "You realize what a disaster that will be?"

"Why? If we got supplies just yesterday?"

Nami and Robin just stared at him with consternation, Sanji looking at them with confusion.

"This is the New World, Sanji," Nami said slowly. "Currently, we are anchored in this very spot because of an fast moving storm that would expend too much energy for us to try and outrace and evade. If we survive tonight, our next destination is Wind Mill Island – and that's an expected three day trip, but if another storm intercepts us along the way, it'll be another day tacked onto that one. So with what supplies you bought the other day, with your great cooking skills, you will be able to make it last for that amount of time."

Sanji blinked. He had no idea of how significant this role was as this ship's cook. Yes, he was a very good cook – he went to culinary school for it. He grew up cooking. He could make a buffet style feast for his closest friends and then some. But that was a different situation. Once he realized he was in charge of feeding an entire pirate crew of nine people for a week's worth of travel, he understood that portions were important and content was definitely a stretch. He started to sweat. Luffy's voice in the back of his mind whispered over and over, " _I'm hungry_."

"Oh, my," Robin said gently. "We are probably going to starve for some time until you get into the rhythm of things. It's a good thing you keep a detailed record of your ingredients and your cookbooks in order to follow off of to produce meals."

Sanji thought of the notes that he'd woken up, to. Sweat dripped down his temple. "Um, about that…"

Robin looked at him with concern. "Uh oh, is there a language barrier? I was hoping that it wasn't so. North Blue language is a different sort of language, and while I'm learning, I'm certain to get certain characters misread."

"It's a good thing there's someone else that can help. They share the same language, right?" Nami asked with relief, wiping her brow. But her panicked expression did not change. She stared at Sanji for a few moments. "Please don't kill us, Sanji."

Sanji gave her a weak smile. He felt terribly pressured.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three –

"Just because we are from the North Blue does not mean we speak the same languages," Law said impatiently, frowning at Robin and Sanji. The latter of whom looked very panicked as he held out a recipe book with his handwriting. Law didn't understand what was happening, but this imposter had no idea how to read his own handwriting, and he was panicking over his responsibilities as the Sunny's cook. "Because he is a Vinsmoke, theirs is exclusive to their kingdom, only. Mine is a different dialect."

"At least try," Robin said. "Maybe between the two of us, we can figure it out."

Law had other things he needed to do. He had to sort out all the weight and heaviness in his chest after Dressrosa, and he had his mind running through the plans regarding the Yonkou, Kaidou. He didn't have time to translate cookbooks. With a sullen frown, he took the book Sanji held out to him, noticing the stare the cook had for his hands.

"What are you staring at? Do you want a closer view of it?" he snapped with irritation.

"No, I'm sorry, it's just - ! Your tattoos! What do they mean?" Sanji stuttered, looking up at him with apology, Robin's face falling into an impassive expression as she settled her arms over her chest.

"None of your damn business."

"At least this will give us something to do while the storm passes over us," Robin interjected gently. "I think it's important that you remain here in the kitchen, Sanji. Please, as it seems you have no experience on deck, do us a favor and remain here so that you may plan your meals for the course of the week. Take inventory of what we have."

"That's a good idea."

"Law, have you a chance to look at the book, yet?"

"I can translate some of it," he admitted gruffly, flipping through the pages. "Since Mr Blackleg cannot seem to remember much of anything, it's important that there are those that know how to swim remain on guard for the others on deck. Such as yourself, and for Mr Strawhat. Does Mr Robot know how to swim?"

"Swim these waters? In a storm? Isn't that dangerous?" Sanji asked.

Both of them looked at him in heavy silence. Robin's lips twitched with a frown, and Law just looked at him with contempt.

"This was your role," Robin said firmly. "You are the best swimmer here on the ship. Zoro is second in line. If any of us fell into the sea, no matter the situation at hand, you were able to retrieve them within mere moments."

Sanji thought about the creatures swimming underneath those ominous waves. How comparable his own swimming skills were with the others. The last time he'd gone for a swim was in a pool in Vegas. And that was unintentional. It was after the seventh cocktail and a following up of Cuervo with no chaser. Law had to pull him out before the Pirates of the Caribbean did.

He exhaled heavily. Law dropped the cookbook onto the counter and stalked away, muttering, " _We're going to die_."

"Oh, but hopefully we _at least_ try not to," Robin said optimistically.

Sanji winced and looked down at the list of supplies that had been taped to a scrapbook. At least he thought it was a list, because there were bullet lines before every item.

"Traveling on the seas is not an easy task," Robin said firmly. "There is a lot of preparation at hand. There is a lot of divvying of chores and responsibilities among capable crewmembers. Having you unable to perform the duties that you were relied upon is going to be…a little interesting. I'll convince Mr. Trafalgar to come back in here to at least write down a couple of these pages, but please perform inventory on the pantry."

Sanji felt sick all over again. Thunder rumbled over head, shaking the windows just slightly. Robin sighed. "It sounds like it is here. Prepare yourself. Oh, and Sanji? Please stop staring at him. You're making him very uncomfortable. It took him a long time to finally open up as he has, with us."

"It's not for the reason you think," Sanji mumbled as she walked away, opening the door to reveal heavy gusts of wind, sheets of rain slanting over the deck. The trees rustled helplessly, and Franky was shouting something that had her shutting the door and hurrying away.

Sanji looked at his phone. He held it up, searching for a signal. But nothing happened, and he tucked it away carefully into his vest pocket. He looked around himself, wanting to be home.

'I think you've had too much,' Law said to him, taking the glass out of his hand.

'That was my last one! Give it back! If I'm going to stop drinking, let this be the very last one!' Sanji had whined.

'That's what you said the last time. Goddamn it, I don't want to carry you home, again!'

'Just call a fucking taxi! Send me away by myself! That's what responsible people do!'

'I'm getting tired of babysitting you, Sanji!'

'Getting tired of me, huh? I get it. Because you're getting tired of _me_. I drink too much, smoke too much, eat too much – everything is too much for you. Self conscious, shy, perfect proportional Dr Trafalgar, you're better off with someone who is more in control of himself,' Sanji heard himself slur, nearly slipping off the stool and onto the floor as he moved to walk away. But he stumbled and fell onto the dance floor, and Shachi tripped over him, and other dancers tripped over him, and Sanji couldn't even remember if Law had helped him back up. In present time, he cringed.

He sat down on the stool, head in his hands.

"Maybe I can stop drinking here," he muttered, leaving the stool, heading for the pantry. Then for the refrigerator, but then he noticed that he had to enter a code. He stared at it for some time, trying to look for the wear and tearing of numbers. Remembering a crime show series, he took to the counter, scooped up some flour, and dusted some atop of the keyboard. Then wiped it away. The grease left behind by previous fingers told him that the numbers used were a 7, 6, 3 and 2. He blew the flour away, looking for the numbers that had the most wear and tear. Once he made the guess, he entered three combinations before the last one unlocked the doors, and he gave a happy fist pump. He walked into the fridge and looked around, nose wrinkling. There were wrapped packages of meat with more marked squiggles. Juice in glass containers. Goods in plastic wear. Fruits, vegetables, perishables stacked neatly on shelves.

Then he spotted the liquor bottles on the very bottom shelf on the left side, and reached for them. He didn't understand the labels, but he opened one, sniffing it for a moment. Then he tilted the bottle over his open mouth. The burn was pleasant, smooth, and it was an intense mixture of amber whiskey and a strange combination of moonshine.

"You're drinking stove cleaner." Law said this as a question, rather than a statement, and Sanji spit it out.

"What is it doing in the fridge, then?" he exclaimed, looking at it with a frown.

"Not only are you useless on board, you're an alcoholic." Law's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "And I _hate_ alcoholics."

"Then you must hate Zoro with a passion, huh?"

"At least he's functional and useful during a storm. Write this down. There are seven 7 pound packages of Khologon lizard meat – "

" 'Lizard'?" Sanji muttered, looking for a pen and paper, having to leave the room to do so. Once he found it, the ship was rocking more than it was earlier, and his stomach threatened to release the sip of alcohol he'd taken just moments before. "Wait, you said _lizard_ meat -?"

" _Khologon_ Lizard meat. There are five 12 pound packages of Moapo lizard meat."

"What's with this lizard business? What does it taste like?"

"There are two twenty two pound bags of sea pig. They were caught just the other day, before you showed up. They needed to be used, soon."

"Twenty two pound bags of sea…pig."

"One fifty pound bag of marinated…some kind of bird. I don't know. Ask Robin about that one. There is two fifteen gallon barrels of broth."

"Bird, like turkey? Chicken? Emu?"

"I said, _I don't know_. I looked in the storeroom. There are exactly fifty barrels of drinking water, two ale barrels, and in the pantry, there are twenty cans of stewed fish. There are fifty five cans of smoked fish. Five bags of flour. Seven bags of sugar. There are beans, vegetables, some sort of tomato sauce …"

Sanji wrote everything down hastily, steadying himself as the ship rocked. He didn't understand how Law could just stand there like it was nothing when he was having a hard time keeping himself standing. He leaned against the doorway, then at the other man when he stopped talking. He was looking at the top shelves, and Sanji sneaked in glances of the white patches on the underside of his jaw, the splotches on his ear. It looked as if the man had bad sunburn, and when the skin peeled off, all that was left behind was colorless flesh.

From the looks of his hands, it extended up into his sleeves. Sanji wondered where else on his body he was marked, sneaking peeks here and there as Law exhaled with impatience and listed off what he could see on the top shelf.

"This is more than enough to feed an entire crew for a week," Sanji said, lowering the piece of paper.

Law looked at him in silence, and Sanji looked down nervously. "If the captain of this ship infiltrates this room, you'll be left with absolutely nothing when he's done. And with each meal you serve, it's as if you're feeding another group of people just with him."

"Luffy does eat a lot," Sanji said, remembering how much his friend ate.

Law's eyes darkened with contempt. Sanji couldn't help but feel ten inches tall at that point, as the man turned and silently walked away from the refrigerator. It felt like he'd just been cut down with his expression alone, and Sanji didn't know how to feel because of it. On one hand, he could see that same expression on his boyfriend's face from last night. On the other, it was the seriousness of the situation, of dying at sea because of his inept ability to even understand the situation he was in, that made him utterly nervous.

Once he closed and locked the door behind him, removing the flour from the keypad, Sanji turned and saw that Law was reading over the recipe books in front of him. Sanji felt sick as the ship rocked violently, and things shifted behind the cupboards. Something above them tumbled and rolled over the deck, and a crash of thunder made his heart leap into his throat.

He swallowed tightly, then looked at his phone. 91%. No service.

He unlocked it, needing to see pictures of the life he knew. All that was in his camera roll were his friends from last night, greasy faced and sweaty, all of them having a grand time. The only one missing was the only face he truly wanted to see. When he looked at other pictures with him, he started to notice the difference in all the earlier albums compared to this one. the strained smiles, the tight lips, the unmoving brows.

He locked his phone once more, fingertips to his forehead. "I can do this. Listen, ba- _Law_. Personal question – "

"I am not interested in answering, or speaking anymore than I have to with you, Mr Blackleg. I would like the other back in your stead, whom I'd trusted to be capable and understanding of the situations ahead of us," Law said bluntly. "Are you prepared to receive this? I can translate it aloud, and you write it down."

 _Oh, I can receive you, alright_ , Sanji thought to himself, looking at the man with interest before looking down at his paper and pen.

This Law definitely wasn't his. His movements were short and impatient. A grumble here, a low sigh there. a frustrated hand to the forehead, an angry push of his heel against the floor. Eyes downcast and angry when making direct eye contact. And he held himself with such a rigid, tense manner that he might've been carved from marble. Nothing about him was graceful. It made Sanji feel as if he were alone with a man that was moments from pulling a knife on him, or waiting for an insult or cutdown, similar to when he was with his brothers.

He thought about the bottle in the fridge. So what if it were a cleaner? It tasted pretty good to him. He just needed a little to calm his nerves a little – after all, what could it hurt? He was in a strange place, with strange people, and if he could relax alittle, he'd make it through this time and be back with the others.

Then he realized Law was staring at him, and it was with expectation, so Sanji straightened up and looked at him with question, prepared to write.

"Did you not hear a word I said?" Law asked.

"Oh, uh, I was, but can you repeat it back to me in case I forgot something? Just to verify that I have it," Sanji said looking over the first few lines he'd written and wincing because he knew Law had said a lot more than that.

"Forget it. I'll have Robin come in and help you. This is a terrible waste of time."

"No, no, please! Look, I'm sorry, I'm just…I'm lost and confused, okay? I keep thinking about home. I'm sorry, please, just…repeat yourself. _Please_. I'm listening."

Thunder cracked noisily overhead, and the ship lurched in one direction, then another, and Sanji reached out and grabbed the counter with a startled curse. He struggled to repress his panic, lightening flashing through the windows. Thunder boomed again, and the ship lurched hard in another direction. Things rattled in the cabinets. Sanji wondered where the others were, taking unsteady steps to right himself. From the windows, he could see nothing but pitch black – which was odd because it had been so sunny earlier. He swallowed tightly, picked up his pen and paper, and looked back at Law, waiting for him to continue. Before Law could, through, Sanji leaned over the sink and vomited noisily, Law throwing up his hands with exasperation.

Sanji ran the sink water, wiping his mouth, then cursed as the ship moved violently to the left. He went along with the movement, bumped into the counter with his hip, then lurched forward as the ship seemed to 'jump' ever so slightly. He almost bumped his face off the counter, thrown off balance. He leaned over the sink once more, puking up what was left. Movement caused him to leave the sink, and he sat down because standing wasn't helping him any. He felt like a rag doll.

"Does this…does this happen a lot?" he asked shakily.

"Yes. It does. Please prepare yourself to write down what I am going to say."

"I – I can't. I can't right now. It's hard to stay still," Sanji protested, catching himself before he could fall to the floor, sitting with his hands spread wide to brace himself.

"Then it is pointless staying here, wasting my time," Law snapped at him, slamming the book shut and tossing it away. Sanji heard a clutter of sound, and looked back over his shoulder, and saw that he was alone in the kitchen. The storm raged outside, and he fearfully looked at the windows, trembling with fright. It felt like the ship would fall apart. It felt like the water outside would somehow smash through the heavy wood walls and crawl in to grab him. Thunder cracked noisily, spreading over the sky with such movement that it seemed it could burst through the ceiling to hurt him.

He covered his ears, panting lightly, lurching to the left as a violent shift in the ship's movement caused things to rattle in the cabinets above him. He looked up at them with fearful eyes, scared that the doors would open wide, sending things flying. But they only rattled, sputtered against the hinges. He'd never felt so terrified before. He pressed his heels into the floor and used the palms of his hands to keep himself from losing balance. Jerking to the side, then to the other, he squeezed his eyes shut and breathed in short, tight pants, wishing he were home.

It'd be easier facing Law's silent anger and the guilty aftermath of an alcohol fueled night. At least he knew what to expect – this storm gave him nothing. Lightening flashed, blinding him, and thunder cracked noisily – he thought he heard wood popping. Something rattled outside the door. He was certain they were moments from being ripped apart by the storm. Panicked, he looked to the refrigerator, and crawled over. It took him a couple of tries, but he punched the code in and lurched in, shutting the door behind him. The sounds were muffled, here. It was only the quiet hum of the generator, and it was probably a bad idea in hindsight. But there was a handle, and he knew he wasn't in any danger of freezing to death.

He crawled over the bags of meat, looking for the bottle. Just a couple of sips would do. It wasn't like he'd be drunk, or anything.

But as he sat there in the corner, listening to the faint roars of the sea crashing against the boat, the rumble of thunder overhead, he looked at his phone. He looked at the pictures, and began looking for the moment when he realized Law's face was changing. Two sips became a couple of drinks. Drinks turned into half a bottle. And by the time Sanji found it, the alcohol had done what he'd needed it to do, and then some.

One he realized how far down the roll of photos extended, he realized one thing with heavy acknowledgment. This man was _not_ going to ask him to marry him.

He tossed the empty bottle aside. Hearing it shatter somewhere near the door made him feel as if some God were punishing him. Teaching him a lesson. He was out of control, he was going to lose the man he loved because he couldn't drop a habit.

This was Hell, purgatory. He had to do the time. Maybe if he learned something new, maybe if he dropped the reliance, maybe he could go home. He'd definitely sober up, he'd do all the things he'd promised Law he'd do – he'd let that thing with Zoro go.

But remembering that was another can of worms.

He wiped his face with frustration, then leaned over some nearby bags of meat, to rest his head on them 'just for a little bit'.

Cold water woke him up. In a panic, he flailed, certain that the ship was sinking. He struggled to remember how to swim, to catch his breath in the same action – but once he realized he'd only been splashed, he looked up with dawning horror. Law frowned down at him with a bowl lowering to his side, and Sanji was familiar with that expression. That combination of exasperation and condescension that crossed the features of his bloodline family members, of Law when he was fed up with Sanji's drunken actions from the night before.

"Ah, I know that look, I'm afraid. I've gone and disappointed you once more, and now you can't stand the sight of me," he said, wobbly as he rose up from the floor. He still felt the alcohol in his system. Every movement was a tentative one. The room kept moving. "When will the storm pass?"

"It did. Hours ago. And you've yet to start dinner."

"Oh no, everyone's going to starve," Sanji said sarcastically, using the shelves to help him out. The sun was back. The brilliance of the late afternoon made his head ache. The kitchen smelled like puke – he ran the sink water, and looked for something to clean it with. But he couldn't figure out how to open the cabinet doors.

"You're a pathetic human being," Law muttered, leaving him in the kitchen as he tossed the bowl towards the sink. Sanji removed it from the stainless steel and set it aside, used to those words. He finally managed to open the cabinet doors – a latch here, a magnetic strip there – and found some soap. He cleaned the sink, washed his hands, and took long drinks from the faucet. Then he looked at the paper he'd been writing on hours ago, and realized it had nothing but a few lines. He would have to think of something else.

Almost an hour later, that ominous alarm sound started again. It started from the soldier's dock and began moving in his direction. Following it were the sounds of accompanying voices, and he bit his lower lip, hoping that what he made was enough. He'd set out the dinner platters with mashed potatoes, steamed vegetables, and barbequed ribs that he'd roasted in the oven. He held a tray with several sets of ribs in one hand, hoping that it all tasted 'right'. The potatoes weren't from Idaho, the meat was some type of lizard, and the only barbeque sauce he'd found were from a container that needed an extra kick to it, so he'd added some pepper and seasoning until it tasted 'right' to him.

Everyone invaded the dining room with loud voices, happy laughter, and relieved faces once they saw the food on the table.

"Finally! FOOD!" Luffy shouted with glee, sitting in his chair nearby. Sanji watched as everyone took to their favorite spots, and suddenly the table was empty. Expressions turned to dismay, shouts turned to loud threats, and once Sanji realized Luffy had swept one long arm over everyone's plate and dumped all the content into his mouth like some sand monster, he froze with a shocked expression. The rubber boy had expanded his mouth to take in the large content of food, and with that expansion, his body shifted and adjust to accompany it. Then they all looked at him with expectation as Luffy gnawed on the bones, mouth smeared with sauce.

Sanji looked at the platter of spare meat he'd prepared in case anybody had wanted seconds. It was all that he'd had left.

"There's no more?" Ussop asked, on a faint whine.

"Sanji? I think Robin warned you this would happen," Nami said carefully.

"Oh, well, cheer up, people! One piece each should be fine," Chopper said. "I'm sure he has more in the oven."

It was extremely difficult looking into expectant faces and knowing he'd failed them all. But he tightened his lips. He was used to it. With a clearing of his throat, he said slowly, "I…I can make sandwiches. There's some…lunch meat left, so…"

"I don't care for a sandwich, right now. I was hoping for some of that," Nami said, pointing at Luffy. "You brought back a lot of it the other day. Didn't you plan on Luffy doing this?"

"I…I didn't believe it. I made…large servings, so…I can make some more. It'll take a couple more hours, let me make you some sandwiches to hold you until then - !"

"it's fine, don't worry about it," Nami said with a disinterested sigh, Ussop looking moments from crying while Robin frowned, Chopper trying not to say anything disrespectful as Luffy continued to chew. "I'll just take some tea. Maybe rice, if you got it."

"I can make some. Give me twenty minutes."

"What's going on, Sanji?" Franky asked with concern. "Usually you're so put together. Is this true? you were switched?"

Sanji wasn't sure how to answer that question when he didn't know himself. "Uh, well…"

"Just answer the question when you come back with more food, okay? I was holding out for dinner, and we're pretty hungry," Nami said firmly, stopping Franky from asking anymore questions. "I think that the next time you cook, you prepare yourself for our stupid captain's actions."

"Y-yeah. I'm sorry."

"You smell like alcohol," Chopper whispered. "Did you drink Zoro's sake?"

" _No_."

"Sanji, you've been drinking?" Luffy asked with muffled concern, shifting in his chair awkwardly to look at him. "But you _never_ drink that stuff."

"I'm hungry! Can we not stop him from returning to the kitchen, please?" Nami asked, hitting the table with a fist.

"I'll take a sandwich," Robin said, her smile a little strained.

"Cola, please, bro. Lots of it."

"A gallon of milk, if you will! Preferably chilled!"

"Sanji, I want some cotton candy. Can you make that first?"

"I have some snacks made, please help yourself to them," Sanji said hastily, returning to the dining room table and setting out a tray of donuts with brilliant colored frosting.

"Ugh, pass. I don't feel like that at all. I'm going back to the library to finish up with my work. Can you bring me up a plate when you're done?" Nami asked, slightly short tempered as she rose from her seat. Robin made to follow, and Luffy waddled carefully from his seat without any apology to his facial features.

Ussop and Brook ate what was left of the meat, and Sanji noticed that Law wasn't there at all. He figured the man found him too much of an eyesore, and he couldn't blame him. He felt rotten for dinner being ruined, and returned to the kitchen to whip up more.

A couple of hours later, he delivered hot plates to Nami and Robin, but they'd lost their appetite by then, choosing to save it for tomorrow. They were headed for bed. Ussop and Chopper didn't mind, so they took the plates and devoured the content eagerly. Frankie was upset because his cola was a little flat, but was satisfied when Sanji made him a massive meat sandwich with mashed potatoes dripping from the bread.

By the time he'd returned to the kitchen, it was a mess. He began clean up, feeling tired. He felt hungover, and sick, and didn't know what to expect for tomorrow. He was hoping to wake up in the bed he shared with Law, and he fully intended on apologizing to the man for that night out. He would definitely go to AA. He would make better effort in getting over that Zoro situation. He planned out tomorrow's meals, feeling hopeful.

When the door opened, he looked up, thinking it was Nami or Robin, changing their minds. But it was Law, and he looked at Sanji with a frown, clearly expecting something.

"I saved you a plate in the fridge," Sanji told him.

Law stared at him, eyes narrowing. His fingers tightened on the sword. For a moment, he looked as if he were going to say something, but he held himself back. Sanji looked at him with question, trying not to notice all the white splotches on his skin.

"I'd like it warmed, please," Law managed to eke out, the request definitely difficult for him to make.

"The oven's still warm. Just toss it in," Sanji said, unable to understand how these people expected him to wait on them hand and foot when it came to their meals.

"You always have it set aside for me, _warmed_ ," Law snapped at him, and Sanji saw his shoulders tensing, his fingers tightening once more.

"It's not that hard! It's on a – "

"You look like you can spend extra energy doing something more for your figure. If it's going to hurt you to do it, then I don't want it."

Sanji stared at him with a carefully controlled expression, used to those words coming from that mouth. Law then stormed out from the kitchen, and Sanji looked back at his things, wondering why it was so hard for the man to ask for anything. It made him miss his Law even more – that man knew what he wanted and went after it when he needed it. If he wanted a warm plate, he either came home on time, or threw it in the microwave.

Then he put his head in his hands because he wished he hadn't drank so much the night before. Maybe he'd be home, now. Everything was so overwhelming, here. He didn't know where he was, and he didn't know where he was going. And everything he'd experienced today was just one disaster after another. Then he began writing again, sure that he'd do better, tomorrow.

He closed up the kitchen and then headed for the men's quarters, feeling exhausted. Once he entered the room, he looked at the bunkbeds. He couldn't make himself climb into the one that was his. He grabbed a pillow and a blanket, then walked quietly outside. He headed back to the kitchen and went to the couch. He made his bed there, turning his back to the table and facing the wall. He pulled his phone out from his pocket, and looked at the percentage bar. 87%.

With a loud sigh, he locked it and tried to go to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four –**

The alarm woke him from a dead sleep. It started as a low rumble in his dream, and then thinned out to a dull whine. Once Sanji opened his eyes, blinking sleepily at the unfamiliar settings in front of him, the rumble grew into a wave of running feet. Everything came back to him in a sudden rush. He lifted his head as he looked at the place with dismay, feeling frustrated and scared – still having no idea how he'd arrived here. The door to the kitchen burst open, and Luffy, Ussop and Chopper rushed in with excited faces – then confused ones as they realized that nothing was set out.

Sanji pulled himself off the couch with a disgusted mutter, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. The trio looked at him, trying to be understanding.

"Did we wake you up at a bad time?" Ussop asked cautiously.

"This is the second day, Sanji," Luffy mentioned. I thought you'd be okay, by now."

"Well, I'm not. Okay? I'm not. I'm still here. What time is it, anyway?"

"It's the first hour and a half," Ussop said.

Sanji stared at him blankly, then looked at his phone. It was nearly seven thirty. "Why is it the 'first hour'?" he asked, throat sore.

"First hour of true daylight."

"Oh. Makes sense."

"Sanji…I'm hungry! I'm hungry from last night, too!" Luffy whined, leaning on one of the chairs.

"Okay, okay, I'll start cooking, hold your horses," Sanji muttered, shuffling towards the kitchen. He yawned a few times, then searched for the coffee machine. Once he found that, he had to figure out how to use it. Ussop showed him how, then helped him find the supplies needed to work it. Once he had that going, Sanji saw that Chopper and Ussop were distracting Luffy from the refrigerator. After gathering some supplies, Sanji then started pulling out pots and pans. He made breakfast, the three males sitting at the table, talking about nonsensical things. Robin entered the kitchen with a disappointed expression, but perked up once she saw coffee was ready.

By the time the second hour came, Sanji was serving them breakfast. He kept a close eye on Luffy as he sat down to eat, but everyone kept asking him for seconds, for refills. When he told them to get it themselves, there was such a fuss about it that he left the table with exasperation, wondering why these people were so helpless. He went around the table and gave everyone what they wanted, sat down to eat, and realized that most of his food was gone. Nami asked for a refill on her coffee, Robin wanted sugar, and Franky demanded cola.

He barely had a bite to eat. The food was cold, and there was less of it as Luffy left. He couldn't believe that they all just got up and left their mess there. They clearly expected him to clean it up. Sanji sat there for a few moments, wondering what was wrong with these people. But he was so hungry that he picked the scraps off from their plates and finished it as he went around gathering dishes.

He was mad about the extra work when he realized that Law hadn't shown up. He remembered last night's encounter, and abandoned the dishes to make a quick plate for him. He was finishing up with the sausages when he heard the door close – he looked up in time to seeing the other man leave with a frustrated expression. The table was still a mess, but he set the completed plate down where he'd seen Law eat before, and even left a cup of coffee the way his Law liked it nearby. He finished washing and drying the dishes, put them away, and cleaned the countertops, the table. Law's food had grown cold, and Sanji was too tired to care. He wrapped it up and tossed both the plate and the cup into the oven. Then he went outside, blinded by the brilliant warmth and light of the sun.

Nami showed him where the bathroom was, and he took a quick shower with the toiletries that were supposedly his. Then he wrapped a towel around himself, and washed and hung his clothes out to dry. He wondered how he was going to get home. He looked over at the others – Luffy, Ussop and Chopper playing merrily on the slide and swing, Nami reading a magazine while sunning herself, Robin reading a book underneath an umbrella Franky held out for her while he sunned himself. Brook was playing music from the stairway, and all around them was the wide expanse of seemingly endless ocean.

When he heard his name called, he didn't get up right away. he took his time to put his clothes back on, rearrange his hair into some semblance of order, and then walked down to where the others were sitting.

"Can I have something to drink?" Nami asked, not even looking at him.

"Hot tea, please," Robin requested.

"Hey, bro, we need laundry done. I'm running out of stuff to wear," Franky mentioned, giving him a cringey shrug.

Sanji couldn't believe the gall of these people. "Go get it yourselves. And do your own laundry."

All of them looked back at him with surprise, and Sanji couldn't help but shrug. " _What_?"

"But that's what you do," Nami stated, lowering her sunglasses to look at him. "You do this stuff, Sanji, because that's your role."

"I understand that I cook, here, but to be your slave? No. all of you are capable of doing it yourselves, just do it."

"But you're on this ship."

"I didn't want to be. I want to be home! I'm not a slave. What do you do for me, huh? Besides order me around?"

All of them stared at him blankly.

"Uh, Sanji, that's just…like, we all contribute to everything, to everybody," Ussop whispered, since he was closer. "I help fix things, here. Nami navigates. Robin mothers us. Franky builds the things I fix. Chopper fixes _us_. Luffy gets us in trouble. Brook plays all our requests and then some. You cook and serve us when we need it."

"Okay, I understand, but to do laundry? To clean? To – what did you want me doing? Cleaning the aquarium? What's and where's that?" Sanji asked curiously.

"I'll show you," Ussop offered, leading the way.

As soon as the pair walked through the door, Luffy looked at Nami and Robin. "It's like he's not trying to be rude, but he's being rude."

"Wherever he came from, he obviously didn't do too much," Nami muttered.

"Maybe we were spoiled?" Robin suggested. "Our Sanji was overly helpful, very respectful of our wants and dislikes, and he basically scheduled his life around pleasing us. Perhaps we are given a dose of a reality that we cannot help but factor into our own lives. Maybe he's tired of serving others."

"This isn't the Sanji we're familiar with. This isn't the Sanji we know. He's a completely different person. So, where is he? Where did he go?"

"These apples he brought back from the market aren't in any of my books. I've sent a messenger pigeon back to the island to inquire the stand owner of their origin," Robin said. "They are beautiful – they're like the night sky, and the insides are a beautiful hue of blue. I have them saved – "

"Then give one back to him and have him eat one, so he can return home," Nami suggested tightly. "I miss our Sanji."

"I suppose," Robin murmured, rising from her chair. "But the process might be more complicated than we think. It might not work as easily as we want it, too."

"Still…I feel sorry for the sap," Nami confessed. "The way he talks about himself, he's just desperate to hang onto what he has. He's losing it. Maybe this was some sort of lesson, for him. Maybe the universe wanted him to learn something from his actions, and forced him upon us. The Strawhats are capable of performing miracles, you know. By the way…has anybody seen Law, this morning?"

"In the tank room."

Nami winced. "Oh."

Robin smiled.

: :

Sanji was disgusted with the task. He was supposed to clean something like that? the tank was massive, and the fish swimming in it were huge, meaty, and brilliantly colorful. He'd never seen such type of fish, before. But he was expected to drop everything and go clean the tank for these people, and they didn't even have any scuba gear. Not that he knew how to 'scuba' anyway.

Ussop looked at him with a frown. "You did it all the time. At least, the other Sanji did."

" _How_?"

"Uh, well, he just jumped in and…" Ussop made cleaning motions. "I mean, there's cleaner snails in there, they eat all the waste that's produced and naturally clear out the built up gunk in the corners, but Sanji – you – would wipe it down from the inside, remove the bodies if you – he – found any, and…yeah."

Sanji watched a fish with brilliant dazzling gills flutter over to the glass, bumping into it with an insistent gesture before its scales shot up and open at its sides, like knives. It vibrated in place for a few moments, then resumed its indifferent look, slowly swimming away from the glass before bumping into another fish and repeating its defense gesture.

"I'm like a slave, here, aren't i? honestly," Sanji said, looking down at Ussop with a frown. "Nami talks about me like I'm someone to respect, but I'm expected to do all this dirty work!"

"Sanji, you – you take on heavy responsibilities, yes. Sometimes I feel she takes advantage of you….sometimes I feel that she could treat you better. But most often, it's _you_ that decides to do everything you do," Ussop told him. He reached over, hand on his shoulder. "You serve us all, hand and foot, because you love cooking. You can't stand it if someone complains that they were hungry – starvation is a huge thing, for you. You went through it, yourself, so you keep it from happening to anyone else. And when you assign yourself these chores, that's all you, man. You know it'll be done if you just do it with your own hands."

Sanji crossed his arms tightly in front of him. "I just don't like it. At home, yes, maybe I did dote on my friends and my live-in too much. But I have a line. I keep my own place clean – if people want food, they know where to find it. It's everywhere!"

"Maybe where you come from, food is. But not over here. It's limited. We have to be careful how much we use, and what we eat. You could cook us actual healing meals. They would heal!"

"Like, magical food?" Sanji asked skeptically.

"Yes! Magical food! The point is, Sanji, out here on the sea, you can't let it go to waste. I'm sure you were told how valuable it is to plan and portion out what we have to make it last for much longer than you think you have," Ussop said carefully.

"Yes, I understand, but if you have a guy that's eating everyone else's meals like it were nothing – "

"That's just Luffy. Luffy….we just let him have it. He did so much for us, he's so important to us – that's just how it is," Ussop stressed.

"It's selfish if you're taking all the food that's meant for others."

"It's just…I suppose you'll just have to see it. I can't really explain it! Luffy is our captain, and we're all devoted to our captain. You, most of all. Your relationship with Luffy is very tight."

"We were friends, yes, but…not that 'tight'."

"Well, whatever happens over there, isn't over here."

Sanji sighed heavily. "I want to go home. I'm sorry, this is a nice world and all, but I'm not meant to be here."

Ussop looked at him for a few moments. Sanji had lost his blazer, removed his vest and bowtie, and looked exhausted with swollen features, eyebags and disheveled hair. He was fifty pounds heavier than their Sanji. When Ussop stepped back to look at him, one question definitely stood out.

"Uh, you know how to fight, right?" he asked cautiously.

"I haven't really fought in a years. Not since my brothers found out I was dating – uh, they were…they were really the only ones I fought with."

Ussop stared up at him with shock. "But you…but you _kick_. You use your legs to fight."

"Yeah, well…I haven't…there's no need to fight where I'm from," Sanji said. "I mean, I can, I guess."

Ussop paled significantly.

There was a low snort from nearby, and both of them looked over to seeing Law bent over a book. Sanji thought it was odd he was wearing a thick sweater with his jeans, considering how nice and beautiful it was outside. The weird smiling face on the front of it was threaded in yellow, the rest of the material dark blue – the hood was furred. He wondered what sort of fur. It didn't match his hat.

"The first battle we come to, and he'll be killed first," Law commented with disgust. "You'll have to adjust your fighting to watch over him. At least the girls know how to defend themselves."

"I'm not saying I _can't_ ," Sanji said, hands to his sides. "I'm saying _I don't have to_. There's a difference. Just…why does it matter, here?"

"We fight all the time, here, Sanji. As one of the most Wanted pirate crews here in the New World, we're constantly defending ourselves," Ussop answered. "Against the Navy, against Marines, against rivals – against enemies. Currently, we're on our way to battle a very powerful man. Kaidou. Law's captain of his own crew, but he and Luffy agreed to an alliance to combat the guy together."

" _Why_?"

"Don't waste your breath, Mr Nose," Law said, rising from the couch and shutting his book with disgust. "He'll be replaced before we even get there. Or dead. Either works for me."

"Hey, let's work on that optimism, today!" Sanji suggested lightly, Ussop looking at him with a studying expression. "You did a great job of it yesterday."

When he got the middle finger in response, Law leaving them, Sanji chuckled. "I think I'm getting through to him. See, there's one of him in my world, too. We're amazing friends. He's always got really nice things to say about me – maybe he'd be a better replacement for this one. I wish he was here, actually."

Ussop didn't know what to say. As a liar, he knew another when he saw one.

"Uh…right. Well, then. Anyway, so this is the aquarium! I can show you where the cleaning supplies are."

"I'm still expected to do this? What if those fish bite me? They're going to tear me apart in there! no, I'm not doing it. Find somebody else to do it. I have stuff in the kitchen to do," Sanji said, turning and walking away. Ussop hurried after him.

"Okay, so maybe the tank isn't your thing. but we really need laundry done."

"Do it yourself. Nobody had done anything for me since I got here. I'm going to take a nap before lunch."

Ussop watched him go, then looked over at the others. Luffy was sitting on the lion's head, singing to himself while Chopper and Robin looked over some apples on the table nearby. Nami was napping on her back, Brook hovering over her with his teeth wide open; Franky was fixing what looked to be the submarine's door panel, re-fitting it with sturdier sheets of metal.

Law was approaching Luffy, saying something that caused Luffy to look back with a wide grin, and Ussop knew how that story would end. Law would talk strategy and planning, and Luffy would say something optimistic and unrealistic; Law would get impatient and angry, and Luffy would laugh and gesture at Sanji or Zoro to help, but since neither were present at the moment…Ussop knew it was a matter of time before Law decided to kill them all. _He just knew it._

He watched Sanji yawn as he headed for the kitchen, and winced. He headed for the men's quarters, clapping his hands with enthusiasm. "C'mon, Chopper! Let's get that laundry, done! We can do this!"

"Sanji was supposed to," Chopper pointed out.

"Is he cleaning the tank?" Nami asked, not moving.

"Uh…no. He said something about preparing lunch," Ussop lied.

"Hmf. Well, if that's it, then," Nami muttered, adjusting her top. "Just as long as he's not slacking off. I'm trying to get as much sun in before the next storm comes. Go get your winter clothes ready."

Once he settled on the couch, Sanji took a nap. He dreamed about being back home. He dreamed that he was pulling off his work shirt and thinking about what he'd make for dinner. But as he walked through the foyer towards the living room, he nearly stumbled on some shoes in the middle of the floor. He crouched to pick them up, then held one for a few seconds, feeling a stillness around him that felt suspiciously like a box. He turned the shoe over and over in his hands and realized that it didn't belong to any of them.

He woke up because he didn't want to see the rest of it. But those ugly feelings remained, and he laid there with his head on his arm, comparing the dream to the actual memory of the moment. He felt thirsty, wanting a cold bottle in hand to wash the bad taste away from his mouth. But that was why he was here in the first place – in order to serve his time in hell, he had to think about his reliance on alcohol. He got up from the couch and shuffled over to the kitchen, trying to put together a proper lunch menu. The dream lingered at the back of his thoughts, and he stubbornly refused to think any further than that.

When he opened the oven to check inside before turning it on, he realized Law's breakfast plate was still there.

"Idiot," he muttered, tossing it and the cold coffee into the sink. He started making preparations, yawning noisily. By the time it was ready, everyone was filing in, looking hopeful. He watched Luffy cautiously, serving him last so the others could at least have something in their mouths before he started eating. That kid dumped the entire contents of his plate into his mouth and looked for more. Sanji retrieved the breakfast plate from the sink, and dumped that into his mouth like he was a garbage disposal. It was amazing how much the rubber boy could eat. With a curious expression, he took off his shoe and held it over Luffy's mouth and watched him eat that with a few chews before spitting it out with a shocked face.

"Dumb ass," Sanji muttered, kicking off his other shoe and walking back to the kitchen to see how much food he had left over. He saved a plate and put that underneath the sink so Luffy wouldn't find it, and when he looked up, the others were all staring at him. "Now, what? you all want seconds?"

"That wasn't very nice, Sanji," Nami admonished.

"He eats everything. I was just curious. Now I'm out one shoe. So what?"

"Yeah, you're right, I kinda do," Luffy admitted sheepishly. "It was just…unexpected."

"That's your own fault for not looking."

"You've got a mean streak, bro," Franky commented.

Sanji wondered why if this was how they treated their slaves. Pirates had slaves, didn't they? They stole people from their boats, from their islands, and then expected them to serve their big demands – they didn't treat slaves as equals. After that, the atmosphere was strangely awkward. They finished their food in silence and then left in the same manner they had this morning. He didn't even get a chance to eat, yet. So he left the mess where it was, made himself a plate, and started eating. When the door opened and Law walked in, he saw the mess and walked right back out. Sanji nearly choked on his food, but he snatched the plate out from underneath the sink and then hurried out after him.

"Here! Here, you didn't even eat this morning, either," he said, vaguely out of breath as he caught up to the other man. "I even had it warmed up and ready for you, but you never came back."

"If I wanted to eat with pigs, I'd sit in a sty with them."

"Look, I'm trying, okay? You people expect weird things at the snap of a finger, and this is my first time serving as a goddamn slave," Sanji said, holding the plate out. "I know you don't like bread, so I substituted rice with vegetables and added some leftovers from last night. It's warm. You should eat it, now, before Luffy smells it."

Law looked to argue, but his stomach growled noisily at that moment. So he snatched the plate from him and walked off stiffly. Sanji watched him go, then called after him, "You look nice, today! I like your sweater, even though it's too hot to be wearing one!"

He returned to the kitchen after a cautious look at the wide, open sky. The ocean didn't seem to end. There was nothing in the horizon. The sun was brilliant, there were no clouds, and the temperature was just right. It truly was beautiful, but he hoped they reached land, soon.

He returned to the kitchen to sit down and eat, but his entire plate was missing. His stomach growled noisily, but he thought positively of the moment. Maybe he'd lose the weight he'd put on this year under these conditions. He went to clean up, then drifted back to the couch to take another nap.

When he woke up, it was dark outside, and he frantically searched for his phone to see if he were late preparing dinner. Once he realized it was only an hour after he'd laid down, he shuffled over to the window and looked out. Then gasped.

Snow coated the entire ship, and was still falling from the sky in thick waves. The clouds were low and ominous, and the chill was felt from where he was. While the sea was restless, moving the ship about with strong jolts, it wasn't as fierce as the storm the day before.

"How is this possible?" he exclaimed, hugging himself. He then left the kitchen, looking for the others. All of them were playing in the snow – Ussop, Luffy and Chopper were making snowmen and having snowball fights. Franky was making an 'angel' while Robin stood nearby. Nami was studying the sky, looking at her bracelet with the weird globes. They all looked as if it were normal, and Sanji decided not to panic. He reached out to catch a few flakes on the palm of his hand.

But that only caused him to remember that time his brothers pulled up to his apartment, leaving their car parked in the emergency fire zone and moving up the stairway with heavy footfalls. It had been the beginning of winter, and they'd just found out that he'd been dating a man, so they had a message to deliver from their father.

He didn't want to think about it, anymore. That was over and done with. He hadn't seen them, since. But then again, their probation status prevented out of state travel.

He lowered his hand and looked to the side when he heard a light scrape of boot on wood. "Hey. How long does this weirdness last?"

Law looked down at the others with much disapproval. Sanji couldn't tell what he was thinking – he didn't know what a Yonkou Kaidou was; he didn't know of this 'alliance' that Ussop had talked about. He figured he should ask tomorrow, if he were still here.

"So, uh, can you translate more of those recipes for me, if you have the time?" Sanji asked, taking a couple of steps his way. "Now that it's snowing, there's not much to do, right?"

Law looked irritated at the request, but he looked over at Sanji with a glare. Then his eyes dropped down to his feet, and he asked, "Where are your shoes?"

"I made Luffy eat one. Don't worry. I lost sensation to my legs some time ago. It doesn't bother me."

"Then you won't know if you have frostbite."

"Couple more minutes, and I'll go back inside. Thanks for the concern."

"It's not concern. You're useless enough as it is, if you lose your feet because of your indifference, that's more of a resource strain on this crew."

"Ah, you're right. Of course. I didn't think of it that way. Thinking about the others' hasn't been ingrained in me, just yet. Look, I come from a place where it's everyone for themselves. Depending on how long I'm here, this is a learning process for both of us. Take it easy, okay?"

Law moved to say something when Nami's surprised shriek and Luffy's loud cry caught their attention. Both of them watched as Luffy flipped over the railing and fell into the water, and this caused a great deal of distress. He automatically looked to Sanji to go in and save him, but _this_ Sanji just watched with vague interest, unmoving. Terror was vocalized with all the crew members as they gathered at the railing, and it was Ussop who tossed himself into the cold waters to retrieve Luffy.

Sanji yawned, turned away and walked back to the kitchen, leaving behind his footprints in the snow. Law looked after him with incredulity, unable to say a thing regarding his indifference. But he saw that Ussop had been successful, and Franky was helping pull them to the deck. With a grit of his teeth and a clench of his sword, Law stalked after Sanji to give him a piece of his mind.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Oh, you were confused? After this chapter, prepare for a headache**

 **Guest: This means** **you** **. :P JK. In no way, is this 'White Rabbit' Sanji. This is a completely different AU. This Sanji will reveal little by little how he got here in the first place, but in the meantime, the adventures he experiences with the crew will help that journey. And it's funny – just with a twist of words and description, the things that Sanji does in canon for the crew can be seen in another way.**

 **Chapter Five -**

Sanji looked up when Law came into the kitchen seconds after him, and the first thing he noticed was how pissed off he looked. It made him freeze for a moment, mind rushing – for a moment the image wavered, and it was _his_ Law that was bursting through the door, wearing the same expression, heavy words in the air. But a blink caused the current picture to stay in place, and the pirate captain was stalking up to him so fast that Sanji really didn't know what to expect.

"You have a role, here, that you are expected to follow. Only _you_ can do certain things. For you to disregard someone's life as if someone else could do it when you have every ability to is _monstrous_ on your part!"

"He was pulled out from the water without my help. Besides, I don't even know if I can swim!" Sanji protested, automatically reaching out to touch his hands, in case they moved his way. "Especially not in snowy water!"

Law jerked his hands away, irritated that this man could think to touch him. He moved back because he did not want those hands on him again, and Sanji stepped back because there was too much emotion between them.

"Those of us with Devil Fruit abilities cannot swim! We rely on people like you! There are rules to the sea that you must understand, and your ignorance on the value of our lives when we've spent most of our lives _fighting_ to live is indubitably troublesome, and why the hell should we rely on a person like you to even understand that when you don't even care for yourself?"

"Sounds like a catch 22 situation," Sanji admitted, reaching up to touch the collar of his shirt nervously. "Look, calm down. Next time it happens, I'll put some effort into it, okay?"

"You'll put effort into it, _now_."

"I don't know how I'll be able to do that when – "

Suddenly Sanji wasn't in the kitchen, anymore. The cold shock of the water that surrounded him, that crushed him from all sides caused him to panic. He breathed in, then sputtered out, arms sweeping through the heavy mass around him. The world was darker, here. It was _silent_. The cold rushed around him, smothered him tightly. His eyes widened, and all he saw was a glittering darkness that gave him nothing. Like falling into a pool of stars. For a few moments he seemed to float in place – nothing moved. He looked up to see where he'd come down, but even his air bubbles didn't move. They just gathered in one place, spreading when he reached up to touch them. They were hard as marbles.

Wondrously, Sanji stared at this. He couldn't think. He looked over his shoulder, the silence deafening. Then he froze in mid-motion, something hitting him with a stark slap to the face; he breathed out, then breathed in. Nothing happened. His lungs did not fill with water, and he breathed normally, as if uninterrupted. He looked down at himself. His clothes were clearly wet, but they didn't move with the rippling of the water. He was just…static.

He was more puzzled then afraid. Was Pirate Sanji able to breathe in water like a fish? It occurred to him suddenly why they relied on him, why they felt he was the best one to retrieve the others from the water.

Now that he knew he wasn't going to die, he looked up, then down, and realized he had to swim _down_ to get to up. His arms sliced through the water – so cold, and yet so light – and once he broke the surface with a light gasp, because it was _expected_ and not that he needed it, he saw that the Thousand Sunny was moving further away. But a moment after he realized this, he was back in the kitchen, sopping wet and standing in front of Law, who stared down at him with that same contemptuous expression he wore when Sanji failed to please him.

He couldn't help but feel tired acceptance for failing once more to please someone that clearly expected more from him.

"I understand," he said heavily, looking at his feet. "I know I have to do this."

Law said nothing else to him, but he left the kitchen as angrily as he came in, and Sanji didn't know how to feel about that. He looked down, and realized that the hem of his white shirt was slightly tinged with dirt. He brushed at it, then gave up because it probably just needed a good washing.

Then he patted his pockets with a panic, yanking his phone from it. There were water droplets sliding down the front of the screen, and he was terrified when it didn't respond to him. But the lock screen flashed on, and he looked at the battery life. 73%. He held it tightly in both hands, pressing it against his forehead. It horrified him to think that once the battery died out, he'd lose access to everything he'd left behind. He felt he would be lost forever. He went to look for a plastic baggie, turning off the power to conserve what was left.

Two hours later, the snow was gone. The sun was back, and Sanji left the kitchen with a tray of drinks. Everyone looked happier that he was attending to them, but he didn't feel pleased inside. Nami looked uncomfortable as she looked up into his face, and he tried to smile, but his lips felt too tight over his teeth. Luffy reached out and caught his ankles, and Sanji had to walk that way as he set the tray down on Nami's table and made his way to the men's quarters.

"Did you like the snow, Sanji?" Luffy asked him, dragging behind him on his back. "It was awesome! You should've come out and played with us! You always play with us when it snows!"

"I saw you fall in," Sanji muttered, making his way to what looked like the washing machine. It was a confusing set up. It looked like all he had to do was feed the machine the clothes, and they'd be sudsed, pressed and dropping into a rinsing system – all on a rolling tray, and there wasn't a dryer that he could see. He swept his hands through his hair with dismay.

"Sanji, are you feeling better?" Luffy asked, still looking up at him from the floor, his hands still wrapped around his ankles. "You don't look better."

"I'm awake, and I know what I have to do, okay? That's the end of it."

"I haven't seen you smoke once," Luffy pointed out. "It's kinda nice."

"I _do_ smoke. I just haven't had a chance, to."

"You sleep a lot. Are you sad a lot?"

"I'm sad because I can't go home, yet."

Luffy helped him sort through the clothing, using only one hand to do so, and doing it overhead; so he was basically just randomly picking up clothes and tossing them in a pile Sanji had made. "Why do you think you're here, Sanji? Do you think our Sanji's at your home? Do you think he misses us?"

"Of course, I'm sure he does. After all, I miss my home, he must miss his."

"Sanji, what are we like over there?"

"Ah…loud. Just like here."

"Do you think your friends noticed that you're not yourself?"

"I think so, if they know where to find me. I might still be at the bar – that's where I was the last time I…I remember, so…hopefully…hopefully they remember where I am," Sanji muttered, looking for the soap.

Luffy was confused. He continued to lie there as Sanji found the laundry soap, then went to gather up the pile of clothes sitting near the locker. It took a lot of cursing and arguing with himself, but Sanji figured out how to use the washing machine as Luffy crouched nearby, watching with a blank expression.

Then he noticed an important detail. He reached out and caught Sanji's shirt at the hem, where he'd noticed the tinge. "Your shirt's a little dirty. You should wash it, too."

"Yeah. It probably needs a bit of bleach," Sanji agreed, picking up the hem to look at it. A few minutes later, he was sitting in Zoro's clothes, uncomfortable with the tight fit of both shorts and shirt, but he set to work.

But no matter what he did, he just couldn't get the dirt out of his white shirt. He noticed that the hems of his arms were the same way, the collar tinged with faint dirty red. He fluffed the shirt a few times, then figured the ocean was just that dirty. Luffy had fallen asleep on the floor next to him, so Sanji finished with the rest of the clothes, rinsing them all separately before piling it all into a basket so he could hang them out to dry.

"Sanji, it's time for dinner preparations," Robin said from the doorway. "Ah, Luffy was helping you?"

"Sort of," Sanji said, rising with the basket on one hip. He felt self conscious of himself, pulling at Zoro's borrowed shirt. As he made to walk away, Luffy reached out and grabbed his ankle and Sanji only noticed because it was difficult to walk. Once he realized the teen was holding onto him, still snoring away, Sanji dragged him along behind him, grumbling while Robin chuckled lightly.

"It seems he can't let go of you, just yet," she said.

"I wish he would. It's time for me to move on," he muttered, hefting the basket on his hip and finding it a struggle to get out the doorway.

Robin said nothing in response.

: :

Later on, Sanji cleaned up the mess the others left behind before sitting down to his plate. Law came in minutes later, saw that his plate was waiting, and that the table was clean. So he sat down and ate silently, and Sanji watched him from the other side of the counter. His heart ached. At the same time, his gut turned.

That dream of turning the shoe over and over became vivid. He dropped it once he realized it didn't belong to either of them. Then he walked towards the bedroom to change out of his work clothes. The memory was so murky, that he couldn't tell what time of day it was, or if the tv were already on, or even why he knew that he wasn't the only one home.

"Is there a difference to my cooking compared to his?" Sanji asked curiously, the memory fading.

Law didn't answer. He just focused on eating and Sanji compared him to a stray animal that appreciated the food being set out, and refused any sort of affection when offered. Feral, almost. But he seemed to get along fine with everyone else.

He looked down at his plate, then realized he was watching Luffy's hand sweep back to the door, stealing off with his lizard steak. He tried to stab that hand but he was too fast and Sanji growled with irritation as he tossed the fork in the direction of the door. He looked down at his plate, and picked off the vegetables with his fingers.

He felt a difference in the fit of his pants, anyway.

"What are Devil Fruits? I meant to ask earlier," he then said, reaching for his water. He wished it were a beer. When he saw that he wasn't getting any answer, he didn't take offence. It was almost like being at home, when Law had finally come home after his long shift and Sanji talked just to hear his own voice. "Must be the reason why you guys can do all these crazy things. How weird. Must be something you buy at the market, huh? Yeah, I guess so. Like those apples. I'll ask Robin, don't worry about it."

Once Law was finished, he cleaned his spot at the table by wiping the crumbs into his hand, dumped it atop of his clean plate. Then he got up to set his plate and cup atop of the counter closest to the sink and left without saying anything. Sanji was grateful for the gesture, and he cleaned the last of the dishes and put everything away before wandering to the couch and laying down for the night.

He looked at his phone. 77%, still no service. He wondered where he'd lucked out with the 5% increase in battery life.

He wasn't going to complain. He turned it off and went to sleep.

: :

He woke up with a violent start. His hands were shaking, fingers stiff. He looked at them, uncurling them slowly. As he waited, those voices were back.

'STOP! _STOP_!'

' _It was only supposed to be us_!'

'This is _your_ fault!'

Then he sat up, breathing hard. All he heard in his mind were shouts and screams, and it took him a few minutes to tell himself that they were just the monster trio waking up for the day.

But the morning light was just beginning to spread over the horizon, and he wandered out from the kitchen to watch the sky change. It was beautiful. The stars were different in this world than they were in his. He had no idea that such things were possible. He gazed up at the twinkling lights above him, watching streaks fly, watching as the water sparkled with gentle waves. The moon hung low, impossibly large. He reached out, feeling as if he could touch it, and watched his fingers become shadow against the light.

He leaned against the railing and continued watching the sky shift colors. From dark blues and purples with vivid splashes of galactic streaks of white and pink to bright oranges and red, to a dull tingey blue. And in the far off distance, he spotted something vague – a shape. Too small to be an island, too constant to be a creature. He wondered if it were another ship.

"Marines," Law said, startling him from the left. "We have to take a different course. Tell your navigator."

"What are 'Marines'?" Sanji asked curiously, turning his head to watch the other man walk away, wondering where he slept at night.

"A pain in the ass."

"You don't even know what that is, I bet," Sanji muttered to himself, propping his chin atop of his palm as he watched the object in the distance change direction. Then he strolled off towards the women's quarters.

Minutes later, he was back in the kitchen, making coffee and breakfast. Everyone was up and in alarm, and no one told him why he should be troubled. He caught sight of the dirt on his sleeve, and rolled it up with irritation. Then tucked in the hem of his shirt, and put on his bowtie and vest. He was crossing the deck space to the men's quarters to look for shoes when he saw the others gathered at the railing, watching the ship approach.

Robin turned to look at him, her face tense. "Perhaps you should wait inside, Sanji."

"Why? Who's that?" he asked, watching the massive ship unfurl another set of sails that snapped in the wind. The symbol was visible, now, and he realized he heard the boom of explosions. When the water around them began to burst upward, the violent screech of incoming artillery breaking through the tension of the Sunny, he jerked around with surprise. Wood burst from the deck above, and he could hear men shouting from the other ship.

"All hands on deck!" Nami shouted, as everyone ran to take up position. "There's no point out-running them, let's just finish them now!"

"GET THEM ALL!" Luffy cried. "Make them pay for slowing us down!"

"Sanji, please, to the kitchen," Robin said to him, pointing up to the deck. "Stay in the refrigerator. We'll come get you when this matter is settled."

The observation room was hit by a cannon ball, and debris rained down around them. Sanji thought of being hit by that, and froze. The massive Marine ship was closer, now, where he could see men in white preparing to fight. Ussop was shooting at them with his slingshot, and Franky was setting himself up in the middle of the lawn to launch something from his arms. Nami was taking the wheel, Chopper assisting her, and Luffy was on the second deck, roaring with cheer, Law next to him, forming that blue sphere of his. And suddenly both of them were gone, two men in white in their place, and Robin grabbed Sanji's arm and yanked him with her as she stalked towards the kitchen.

Because of the seriousness of the situation, the look on her face, Sanji didn't even protest. Chopper was there to fight the Marines that charged them, and Robin stopped in mid-step to assist, arms over her chest. Arms sprouted over the men's shoulders, and twisted their heads in opposite direction while Chopper hurried off to help Franky and Brook guard their ship.

After seeing that terrible sight, Sanji continued towards the kitchen, shutting the door gently behind him. A cannon ball shattered one of the walls, sending debris over the table, and exploded through Chopper's infirmary room. He didn't hesitate. He ran for the fridge and locked himself in, breathing hard. The sounds were muffled, here. He crouched in the furthest corner of the area, elbows atop of knees.

'It's only us, now,' Law said to him.

'Is that really a good thing?' Sanji asked, panting hard. 'Who's more dangerous?'

' _You're_ the one holding the knife.'

' _You're_ the one with the hands around my neck!'

He couldn't remember why they had that conversation at all. The memory was too murky. _Why_ was he holding the knife?

He reached back and found another one of those cleaner bottles. He opened it, and took careful sips. It felt better drowning out those confusing memories, drinking to forget.

: :

When the door opened, Robin smiled at him. Then she frowned because she could smell the alcohol. "It's over."

"What was that about?" Sanji asked, rising unsteadily from the floor. He followed after her with careful action, seeing how the cannonball from earlier had rendered the place into ruins. The table was done for. Some chairs were missing, the couch was ruined. Chopper's office was shattered, but the floors and some shelves were still standing.

"Ah, wait, don't move," Robin then said, looking at his bare feet. "I will bring you some shoes."

Multiple arms swept up from the floor, and cleared debris from his intended path. Once she deemed that it was safe for him to walk through, she led the way outside, and repeated the action up to the stairway.

Out on the deck, there were Marines lying everywhere, but Frank, Chopper and Ussop were helping dump them out to sea. Nami was spraying away the blood with a hose, and Brook was playing a mournful tune on his violin, encouraging sailors' souls to continue home.

Luffy was napping on the lion's head, and Law was sleeping in his seated position nearby. When slim arms deposited Sanji's shoes in front of him, he slipped them on, making a face. But at least they were covered. Satisfied with that, Robin smiled at him and left his side.

She met with Nami briefly, and when Nami nodded and gestured towards the women's quarters, Sanji figured she was headed in for a nap. Swaying slightly, he looked over the mirror-like surface of the ocean for the ship that had swallowed up his vision earlier. Far behind them in the trailing wake of the Sunny, the Marine ship burned, a pillar of black smoke pushing towards the blue sky, leaving nothing of its structure behind. Sanji stepped up to the railing and looked down - he watched dead Marines float in the choppy waves caused by the Sunny's travel, nameless faces looking up at the blue sky.

The reflection of the sky could be seen in the waters below – Sanji couldn't tell if the dead Marines were floating in the water, or in the sky.

It was almost symbolic.

: :

That night, after dinner, Law approached him with a book. He handed it to Sanji with his white tipped fingers, and Sanji had to remind him that he couldn't read the language there.

"You can look at the pictures," he muttered grumpily. Sanji found himself staring at a single white patch at the left corner of his mouth. He wanted to press a kiss there, to see if that discoloration made him taste differently.

Then he felt guilty for even thinking that.

"What are the Marines? And what was that about, anyway?" he asked.

"They are a military sea force, ordered to maintain law and order over all those who sail these waters. We're a Wanted crew, and Strawhat is a threat to the World Government. They will attack us if they see us."

"Will they kill us?"

"They always try." With that, Law left the kitchen.

"I want to go home," Sanji said in a forlorn tone. He wished he could remember what happened after they left the bar. "God, I promise not to drink anymore! Er…after this. After today. After today, no more drinks! I just want to go home…"

When Sanji opened the book, he could, indeed, 'read' the pictures. He learned that the Devil Fruits gave people certain powers. But with a condition – they had to avoid water, because with the power that the sea gave certain individuals, the sea gave them vulnerabilities in order to reclaim their souls. These people were drawn as anchors, falling towards the depths of the ocean. He closed it up and set it aside.

"Makes sense," he said to himself.

: :

It was after breakfast, and Sanji was cursing as the fertilizer to Nami's tangerine garden threatened to make him sick. He didn't understand why she couldn't do this herself – but she pushed the task to him, and he only did it because the weather was nice, and he wanted to get out of the kitchen so they could stop asking him for stuff. He sat back on his heels and looked up at the blue sky – the ocean was nearly the same color as it, the surface so still and calm that nothing moved but the Sunny.

When he heard the screams, he gave an impatient sigh, threw the spade into the soft dirt he had been working in. He looked over to seeing them all looking over the railing, but it wasn't Luffy, this time. Since most of the Strawhats were standing there with helpless expressions, Sanji figured it was Law. How that happened when the man was usually out of sight, Sanji would just have to ask later. With a nervous breath and a grit of his teeth, he pushed over the rail and fell for what seemed like a long distance.

Just like the first time, he didn't have to breathe. His limbs were light in the murky darkness. It took a couple of twists and turns, but he saw the other man sinking helplessly towards the darkness of the depths below.

'Anchors', Sanji remembered, moving in that direction. He reached out and grabbed the other man's limp hand – thinking it was odd that there was movement in that action, and not in his own – then turned _down_ to move up. The air bubbles he left behind scattered as he swept through them. The light of the surface caught his eye, and he hesitated for just a brief moment.

The bodies of the Marines were still there, facing the sky. Their unmoving forms were forever caught in statue-like positions – slightly crouching knees, arms spread wide at their sides, caught in the waves. Their hair fluttered, as if caught in some invisible ripple. Their clothes flapped with the movement of the sea. Beyond them, the sky was a beautiful blue – white clouds shifted over with gentle grace. It was a strange sight, but he expected it, now, because of weird weather patterns, and Devil Fruit users, and skeletons that sang creepy lullabies.

He looked around himself, floating in black, starry nothingness that left him in cold silence, with a lack of fear or threat of harm. Marines above his head, and him below; almost as if he were trapped in some sort of halfway dimension.

He broke through the surface, struggling to pull Law after him. When the other man broke the surface, he sputtered and coughed, struggling to breathe, and Sanji didn't have trouble at all. He reached out for Franky's extended hand, and the half man, half robot pulled them both up to the ship's deck.

"I'm so sorry!" Luffy exclaimed once they helped Law over the railing. "I'm so sorry! _I didn't see you_!"

"MORON!"

"Please don't chop me in half!" Luffy cried, Chopper running away with fright, Nami slapping him upside the head.

"Watch where you're bouncing, next time! And _you_! You're the idiot for not teleporting yourself from place to place when they're playing that game! You should know by now, what will happen!" she snapped at Law as he pulled his hat off and twisted it, water falling to the deck.

"Good reflexes, Sanji," Robin said, as Sanji turned and walked back up the stairway, huffing and puffing by the time he reached the deck. Then he made his way back up to Nami's tangerine garden and continued working, cursing because the smells were so bad.

That night after everyone left, and he was grumbling after he managed to stop Luffy from stealing his food, he grew aware that Law was looking at him funny.

Sanji looked at him with a frown, and it was the first time Law didn't look away, or grow angry for even _thinking_ Sanji was looking at those white marks.

"You're welcome," he said, just in case Law was planning on thanking him for saving his life.

Law grew uncomfortable, clearly not knowing what to say. He didn't know how to vocalize what he'd seen that afternoon, underneath the water with Sanji. He couldn't quite describe what it was. He knew Sanji was a good swimmer – everyone reflected on it. They depended upon him for it. But he'd never witnessed the man in action, himself. So what he'd seen had to be normal.

It _had_ to be.

"Thank you…Mr Blackleg," he said stiffly.

He froze when Sanji gave him a brilliant smile in response, and it was probably the only time someone had thanked him for anything since he got here. It made him feel uncomfortable, again, and he quickly left the kitchen.

Sanji looked back down at the repairs that needed to be done to the kitchen. He couldn't sleep in here. He found the remains of his pillow and walked outside. The night was so bright with the stars shining so brilliantly from above. He went down to the grass and laid there instead, folding his hands behind his head.

It felt like he was in the ocean again; the air was still, the stars were bright, the darkness never ending. He heard nothing of the waves hitting the hull – the anchor chain didn't even rattle. He reached out, as if he could touch the stars, and was fascinated with the way his fingers stretched out, shadowy against the light. A contrast of color.

'Even in madness, I still love seeing you smile,' Law had told him.

'Don't say that when you're the reason for my madness,' Sanji said.

'Fuck you both,' Zoro told them.

"Oh, what a pair, me and you," Sanji said aloud to himself, just to drown out those voices. "It was only supposed to be _us_ , Pooh Bear. You bastard."

He knew he wouldn't get an answer, this time. He was the only one floating between the stars, after all. He flicked his hand from here to there, pretending to watch the stars scatter with the movement.

: :

"Those stains are getting worse," Luffy observed, looking at Sanji's sleeves. The tinge was crawling up his arms, now. The captain was sitting at the bar, eating an extra breakfast sandwich after everyone had left. Law was sitting at the table, saying nothing as he ate.

Sanji frowned at the stains, brushing at the material. "It's really annoying. I can't seem to move the stains an inch."

"You just need a new shirt," Luffy decided. "We'll buy you a new shirt at the next island. You and Nami can go shopping."

"Sounds like a slave's reward, Captain," Sanji said with a sigh, leaning on the counter to reach across and flick his nose.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Okay, enough spamming this story with posts. Can't neglect my weights.**

 **Lily: Yes, they are all very flawed; I like it! I agree with you on some of your pairings, but they're out there. We've all got to embrace each other for it (hehehehehe) The mystery is slowly being revealed – did he? Or didn't he? With him? Or him? Heh. Thanks for dropping by!**

 **Naghi-tan: Are you for this pairing? Or nah?**

 **Guest #1: Don't be embarrassed. I thought we were closer than that, by now :D But is Sanji holding his breath underwater? Or is it a completely different environment than we actually know for him? He was drinking alcohol that was used as a cleaner – some alcoholics are a little desperate when it comes to it. His clothes do play a significant role – they will be telling his story the more he speaks about himself. D:**

 **Guest #2: Welcome! This will be angsty. As for your question, it's to be revealed soon…haha, it's not a popular pairing, is it? But I see it's out there. Thanks for dropping by! :D**

 **Chapter Six –**

They were talking about this 'Yonkou', again, and Sanji really didn't know the content of the conversation. There was numerous mentioning of 'that bastard Doflamingo', of Big Mom, of Shanks eluding ambush. There was 'Supernovas', Akainu, Sengoku – the Navy was up to something, but nobody had any idea what.

He listened to Law, Robin, Franky, Nami and Luffy talk, but Luffy really wasn't paying that much attention to the conversation. Law was getting angry that none of these people could think or strategize the way he could, and his impatient tone grew gruffer, his words shorter, and his expressions changed with such stark action that Sanji felt amusingly sorry for him. Luffy gave up because the conversation was too long and 'boring' and all he wanted to do was eat, and if he couldn't eat, he didn't understand why he was sitting here listening to this – Law looked ready to kill him, and it made the others nervous.

Franky and Ussop were repairing the kitchen walls as they spoke. Sanji didn't know what was going on, so he didn't strain himself trying to listen anymore than he had to. He dried the dishes by hand and put everything away. He stood in the refrigerator, trying to decide what to make for tomorrow.

' _I can't breathe_!'

'That's too bad.'

He stepped back because his throat felt too tight, and Brook gave a startled yelp, Sanji giving a surprised curse as he stumbled to catch himself.

"I thought you knew I was standing here. You were standing on my foot this entire time," Brook said patiently.

"I can't feel from my legs," Sanji told him, shutting the metal door.

"Oh? Are you _half_ a ghost?"

"Old spinal injury."

"But your legs work fine," Brook noticed.

"They do now."

"How did it happen?"

Sanji was uncomfortable talking about it. Not without a drink in hand. He tossed his list onto the counter, listening to Nami and Robin talk about retrieving Zoro quickly, so they could move onto their next step.

"My brothers were assholes," he said.

For a moment, the scene changed. Blinking open his eyes, he was staring up at the ceiling at the hospital, and the sounds around him assured him in that he was not leaving any time soon. He couldn't feel his legs. The policemen standing nearby wanted him to press charges, but he didn't know if he could do that. In the end, Sanji realized the memory didn't make sense. He was missing vital chunks of information that made the scene true.

"How unfortunate," Brook murmured, towering over him, distracting him from the memory. "And what happened after that?"

Sanji hated to think about it. But he said with a slow shake of his head, "I just…want to go home. I remembered giving the order to send me home by taxi, but now I'm wondering if I was kidnapped by you bastards. _Somehow_."

"Yo ho ho ho! We don't do the kidnapping! People come along with us willingly, because we are _winners_ , Sanji," Brook said with a merry laugh.

"Yeah, I suppose."

But Brook looked at him with that expressionless, skeletal face of his. "But I wasn't talking about your brothers, Sanji dearest. I was talking about –"

"Is that why you can't fight?" Luffy interrupted, lying over the counter, listening to every word. "Because you're broken, Sanji?"

"After my brothers were sentenced to two full years of jail, and set to serve 15 years probation, I have no reason to fight, anymore."

Luffy frowned, picking his nose. Causing Sanji to slap his hand away because the habit was disgusting in the kitchen. "I hate your family, Sanji."

"Join the club."

"I'll never forgive your father for what he did to your hands."

Sanji didn't want to know. He looked at his own. They seemed to be working just fine.

"Our Sanji will never be the same," Luffy said with a sigh.

: :

After everyone had headed to bed, Sanji had been surprised to see that only Law had stayed behind. So he made some tea to give to him, and waited for him to talk first. He looked at his phone, frustrated to see the no service symbol in the top left corner. He wrapped it up carefully after turning the power off. Then he looked at the man across from him.

"That morning you arrived, you spoke of strange things," Law said, handling his tea carefully.

His white tipped fingers and discolored hands reminded Sanji of flesh that resembled sunlight seen through leaves, the shadows of such things permanently itched on his flesh, like brilliant white tattoos. He wanted to reach out and touch, just to feel the warmth of the sun on his own skin. Then he realized the content of Law's statement, and felt embarrassed that he'd even bring it up.

"It's not something you want to know," Sanji mumbled, chin on palm. "I'd gone out with my friends that night before. But I can't remember what I did. It's a problem for me, drinking too much."

"You consumed enough alcohol to block an unpleasant evening out? Or consumed to avoid a problem?"

"And the difference being?"

"Consuming alcohol to block out a situation is preferred by most. Consuming to avoid a problem is meant for those too cowardly to face up to something they'd caused themselves."

"Both," Sanji mumbled, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

"What was the situation that caused you to drink in the first place? I'm assuming it's a relationship problem."

"Why are you so interested, now?" Sanji returned vaguely, looking at the phone wrapped in plastic nearby. He expected it to vibrate, to flash with a message. To light up with a call. But it did none of these things because it was powered off, and it was at 68%.

Law didn't know how to speak of what he'd seen underwater. He wasn't sure how to take the situation. He didn't understand 'alternate realities', and travelers that drifted from one space to another. But now that it was sitting in front of him, he was curious.

"You mention constantly that you wish to return home. I'd rather that you did and we had the real Blackleg back so that once we face Kaidou, we aren't forced to watch over you," he said honestly. "So, in asking this, I just want to help you figure out how you came to be here, and how to return you so that we can continue on uninterrupted."

"You never were one to soften the weight of your words when it comes to blows," Sanji said with a sigh, unbothered.

Law sipped at his tea. "There is a me in your reality?"

"There is a you," Sanji admitted, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

"Is he splotchy, too?"

"No." Sanji cleared his throat noisily as he watched Law's expression take on a bitter one.

"These are scars from an old disease that was supposed to be terminal. They constantly remind me of what I failed to do along time ago."

"What, _die_?" Sanji asked sarcastically.

Law glared at him. "What a thing to say, Mr Blackleg. You fail to understand the significance of what I'd endured as a child – "

"Because I don't know what happened to you as a child, but I think they make you beautiful. When I look at you, I see a gorgeous day in the park, sitting underneath a tree with big leaves, and the sun is shining bright, but coming through the small spaces in between those leaves to fall on your skin," Sanji said, imagining the picture with a warm expression. "You might think of them as deformities or 'splotches', but when I look at you, I wonder how anyone could turn away from that warmth still imprinted on your skin when they could be relaxing against you, bored to death with your ramblings – "

"You are an asshole, Mr Blackleg."

Sanji looked at the man sitting stiffly across from him. Shoulders so rigid and still that he could've been carved from stone. Glaring so fiercely at the table that it should've cracked and crumbled under it's power. He'd never met such an angry, self destructive person before.

"I've been told that, countless times, but I fail to see why my words offend you when I'm just being honest."

"Nothing you said was positive or endearing!"

"Nothing was rude or condescending about it, either. All I did was compliment you. And when I mentioned being bored to death by your ramblings, it was a good thing."

Sanji looked up at the ceiling with a smile, seeing the pleasant images as he spoke them. "I used to fall asleep listening to you talk about boring things, and when I woke up, it was the best way possible because I was close to you, and you hadn't moved at all, and you were so considerate and lovely that I couldn't let go of you, even when you pushed me away."

Law didn't know what to say at this point.

Sanji looked down at the tabletop, a far off expression to his face. He traced a groove with the tip of his finger, noticing that his fingernails had a slight bluish tint to them. He'd always had a problem with low blood pressure. "When you have something for so long, it's not that easy to let go of it. When it's gone, what do you do next? How do you live without it?"

Law couldn't help but think of his current situation. After Doflamingo was defeated, knowing that the man was still alive – Corazon still dead – it seemed his drive to continue on for another purpose had dimmed. He'd accomplished what he'd planned for years to do – to get revenge on the man that killed him twice. Now that it was over, _what was next_? He'd spent hours thinking about it. He should've been happy, by now. He should've been free from the weight. He should be free to look forward to _living_.

But he wasn't. And he didn't know how to share it because no one knew of that purpose. He had debated with himself over sharing his personal weight to someone that could understand the gravity of it, but he'd yet to find that person.

Meanwhile, he couldn't think of anything to say in response to Sanji's words, but he sipped at his tea to do something.

"Eventually, you learn to live without it," he said simply.

"You can _physically_ live without it, it's possible. But when it was all you had, what happens when you wound up with nothing left?" Sanji looked off to the side with an intensely forlorn expression. But he straightened up with a smile that looked like it hurt with how forced it was. "So I drank to forget, but in doing so, I caused a whole lot of problems. In losing something that made me as I was, I became something else, and I turned the situation into something that it wasn't. It's so pathetic, hearing myself talk about it. When someone hears of it from the outside, how do you think they'd take it? They make it small because it's not something they'd understand, so it's not something that hurts them, but…well…sorry to ramble."

Law understood. It startled him so badly that he understood exactly what Sanji was talking about that it hurt his chest to hear the things he'd been thinking come out of someone else's mouth.

His jaw tightened for a moment before he said stiffly, "When somebody loves you, it's difficult to forget the warmth that was built behind your heart when the source was removed forcibly. The purpose that it gave in one's existence turns into something else when you didn't agree to its exit. I understand that much."

"Exactly," Sanji said on a sigh. "That's when I turned into a desperate drunk, willing to forgive and forget and lost track of myself as myself."

"That's when I grew angry. Still am."

"What do you do with it?"

"There's nothing you can do for it."

"This can't be the end of it," Sanji murmured, thinking mainly of himself. "There's something I have to do in order to settle it peacefully. I just have to find a way."

"Someone once told it that you have to make peace with yourself in order to settle old affairs," Law said slowly, stiffly. His teacup shook as he finished the last of it. He waited to hear something disparaging from the other man, to have a derisive expression turned his way. But Sanji was looking at something in the distance, and Law found strange comfort in that.

His eyes then dropped to Sanji's clothes.

"Were you playing in Miss Nami's garden, again?" he asked, gesturing at Sanji's shirt with his chin.

Sanji looked down at himself, startled to see the dirty tinges completely covering both forearms, sprinkled over the front of his shirt like drops of rain. He pulled away from his seat with a mutter, brushing his hand over the material a few times. "It's this weird ocean air, it's doing something to my clothes. I can't get the stain out."

"It almost looks like blood, Mr Blackleg."

"Which is weird, because I haven't had much contact with it at all. Maybe it's from the meat I used for dinner," Sanji decided, walking away from the kitchen, intending on finding a shirt to wear while he soaked this one, again.

Law noticed that he still wasn't wearing any shoes. The ones Robin had given him were sitting neatly near the kitchen bar counter. But his feet must've been very dirty, because as he walked out, he left a faint trail of footprints behind on the clean floor. But he sat there for awhile, just thinking about the words Sanji said.

He didn't know why, but he had goosebumps.

: :

Sanji stared up at the stars. Somewhere in the distance, a strange animal screamed, breaking the surface of the water. The echo of the splash collided with the stillness of the deck. The closed sails fluttered from the hem, and the trees rustled softly. The anchored ship drifted lightly atop of softly moving waves, and he looked from the vivid splashes of blues and violets to look down at the water below. He wondered if it looked the same as it did from below as it did from here.

He didn't think about it – he climbed over the railing and dropped into the water. He heard the splash, he felt the cold surround him – but the immense silence was immediate. Nothing moved. His clothes rippled with water movement, but he couldn't see it. It was all the same as the colors in the sky, and he had trouble discerning if he were really in water, or if he were trapped in the blanket from the above. He brought his limbs in close to his chest, floating weightlessly, without breathing.

He didn't know how long time passed as he floated in this weightless environment. But he opened his eyes and saw the stars, the brilliance of their burning light surrounding him with peace. He felt like he could sleep and not worry about waking up. He felt like all his problems were gone, and the memories that he carried were replaced with peaceful silence.

Nothing moved.

Nothing sounded.

When he looked down – up – he saw the impressions of clouds in the night sky, and the outline of the anchored Thousand Sunny. But the waves didn't ripple – only his hair shifted softly over his vision, clearly encased in water, but…static.

There was a flash of light that left an imprint on his eyelids. It was a struggle to open them. But once he did, he was looking at a flare that coasted slowly through the nothingness – wavering with gentle action, rippling as if it were merely cloth fluttering through the water. Then he realized that he couldn't stay down here forever. He wasn't meant to.

He turned, and swam down – up – and broke through the surface, startled at the brightening horizon in the distance. He swept his hair from his face, watching as the sun cast an orange red over the flat surface of the water. The warmth touched his face, and he closed his eyes because when it warmed his skin, he could feel the memory of good times lingering over his flesh. Of laughter, intimacy, of being told that what they had was always going to be forever.

'Even if I do this?' Sanji heard himself ask.

'Even if you do this,' Law promised him.

'But I'm a mess.'

'You're the mess I created.'

'I fucking hate you both,' Zoro said.

The rope ladder startled him, and he reluctantly took it, climbing it slowly. Feeling nothing on his feet. Halfway up, he wondered why he _couldn't_ feel, anymore. He looked down at his toes, and they were a bluish tint around the nails, and he figured it was just a lingering effect of swimming in an ocean that gave him false peace.

Law didn't say anything to him, but he handed him a blanket to wrap around himself, and pulled up the ladder to put away. Sanji went straight to the kitchen, and turned on his phone. The battery percentage read 75%.

He didn't understand.

"You won't find your peace down there," Law said to him from the doorway. "You can't reach the stars when you're trapped in the sea."

"I'll show you the sea, if you help me to the stars," Sanji murmured, wanting coffee.

Law thought that was impossible. But he walked away without saying anything else, stepping carefully over the footprints that were fading with the rising morning sun.


	7. Chapter 7

**Guest#1: Yeah, they seem like a group of assholes, don't they? All your questions will be answered later in the story – I know they're driving everyone crazy, haha As for your battery charger observation; that's pretty good! I like that theory :D**

 **Lily: Yeah, I'm guilty of fast updates. I spam that inbox a lot. It's a disease, I'm afraid its incurable. The mystery of the trio is definitely part of the story – the more it goes on, the more it'll be revealed exactly what. At this point, Sanji himself doesn't know what's happened, he still has to figure it out. I'm definitely agreeing with ya on the pairing situation, though, but everyone has their own thang. I'm glad you got into LawSan! Check out the rest of my fics – they're pretty, uh…different. And there's other great ones out there. Welcome to the club!**

 **Guest #2: I like your questions – they'll all come together, soon, though. The clothes are only part of the story – the more he learns, the more they reveal. Unfortunately, he hasn't touched upon it, yet, and the cellphone is definitely connected with the situation he left.**

 **Thanks for everyone's comments and interest in this weirdo brain fart of mine!**

 **Chapter Seven –**

"ISLAND!" Luffy's shriek pierced Sanji's thoughts, and he jerked violently, dropping the hose he'd been using to water Robin's garden. Brook was sitting nearby, enjoying a cold mug of milk and Chopper was looking at his tome again, a handful of vials spread around him.

Both Chopper and Brook were on their feet and looking in the direction Luffy was shouting – Sanji looking in the opposite direction because sound carried so oddly out in the middle of no where – and they were able to see a very faint rise of land in the far distance.

"It's _land_!" they cried happily together. Sanji looked in their direction, then spotted the same thing that they had. He felt their joy because never did the sight of anchored earth fill him with such happiness.

"Thank God!" he exclaimed. "I can't wait to get off this damn canoe!"

"Yes, sir! Finally!" Chopper exclaimed, picking up all his things and then shuffling off awkwardly.

"Have you finally figured out what you were unable to remember?" Brook asked Sanji, tilting his head.

Sanji looked at him with a questioning expression. He hadn't even been thinking of such things. He had been going over the list of chores that Nami had wanted him to complete, and while he'd argued over most of them, he had most of them completed. He _still_ had to climb into the aquarium, and that task filled him with anxiety, thinking of the fish with big teeth.

"Actually, I hadn't been thinking much of anything," Sanji admitted sheepishly.

Brook studied him for a few moments, then nodded. "It takes some time putting one's self back together after a traumatic event."

 _Going out to a bar was traumatic_? Sanji thought to himself, thinking back on what he could remember. Nothing about what he saw was life-changing; it was just another drunken episode in his playlist of things he did wrong.

"Did you drink often, Sanji?" Brook asked curiously.

"It was an everyday thing," Sanji admitted slowly. "I was really stupid. And that was my problem, I just…didn't care, I guess. I drank because it was easier to forget what sort of person I actually am when I'm sober. I put my live-in through a lot of trouble. They had to deal with it, the most. I don't blame them for the things they did because of the person I am."

"But to excuse their actions, isn't that dangerous?" Brook asked curiously, looming over him so close that he was like an unusual shadow in Sanji's personal space. So he turned and sprayed him with water, and Brook stumbled backwards, flailing like he was drowning.

Sanji watched with indifference as Brook struggled to breathe, reaching for the surface. He lowered the hose and turned it back to the garden, but the skeleton was still in the throes of dying.

"BROOK'S DROWNING!" Ussop screamed from somewhere on the deck, his voice echoing out over the waters.

"SANJI! SAVE BROOK!" Luffy screamed from somewhere nearby.

"BROOK IS ALREADY DEAD!" Sanji reminded them with an impatient scream of his own.

"Oh, yeah, that I am, yo ho ho ho ho!" Brook laughed merrily, straightening.

Sanji thought about Brook's question, and didn't know what to say about that. He remembered all of them buying him a drink. But he also remembered all of them telling him he needed to slow down. It was a contradiction. He sprayed the moist soil for a little longer before turning the hose on the tangerine garden.

"Yeah…but maybe I wasn't the type of friend that I should've been, either," Sanji said slowly.

'You're the one with the knife.'

"Friends do what other friends are doing, ho ho ho ho…look at us, now! Following Strawhat to the ends of this world for adventure!"

"I wish I could remember," Sanji said with frustration, turning off the hose.

"Have you looked at that weird device that you carry?" Brook asked.

"I did. But what I'm looking for isn't there," Sanji said with a sigh, pulling it out from his back pocket, sitting down at the edge of the roof so that his bare feet were dangling over the open air. Below him, he could see Nami hitting Ussop and Luffy, scolding them for making a mess on the lawn. The Slip-n-Slide that they were using looked tattered and torn. Chopper was talking to Robin with a serious expression, and Franky was tanning himself at her feet, which were propped up on his scarred chest. Law was napping underneath the main mast, sword resting against the length of his body, arms crossed tightly over his chest, knees holding tightly to the scabbard.

He turned it on, and it told him it didn't have service. Brook looked over his shoulder, humming.

"It certainly is strange," he said. It's so bright! Vivid! How does it work?"

"You touch the screen, like this," Sanji showed him, moving through various apps, but not showing him the sections that could give away the relationship he had.

"Keen!"

"Wow, I have not heard that word in, like, forever," Sanji said, chuckling. He turned it off, re-wrapped it. The battery percentage read 74%. "I don't have a charger for this, but…instead of losing power, I gain it, somehow. I don't understand how that happens. This is a weird world."

"But it's our world, and even we don't understand it, sometimes," Brook reassured him. "What do you see in the sea that gives you peace, Sanji?"

Sanji looked at him, thinking it was an odd question. But he answered it as best as he could, hands in the air as he described the things he saw. Brook 'oohed' and 'ahhed' at appropriate moments, looking up in the direction Sanji's hands moved.

"Are you trying to reach for the sky, Sanji?" he then asked after the other man fell silent. "Because how could it be there when you are clearly underwater?"

"Why would I? Or do you think that's where I came from?" Sanji asked with a bewildered face. "I don't think I'm trying to reach for the sky, but Law said the very same thing, this morning. Is that a thing with you people, here?"

"All souls drift to the sky, Sanji," Brook told him.

"I don't believe in that stuff. Once we die, we die. That's it. Why didn't yours leave this earth?"

"Because I was trapped by the sea! And look at me now. O, ho ho ho ho you and I can be kin!"

"I'm not reaching for the sky, though. I'm pretty much alive and breathing, thanks," Sanji said uncomfortably, feeling for a pulse just in case.

"But you don't smoke."

"I do! Constantly! I just haven't had a chance, to! I've been told to do this and that since I woke up! Slaves aren't allowed personal vices!"

"Slaves shouldn't be slacking off when they've got an aquarium to clean!" Nami shouted up at him, hands on her hips. "It's looking disgusting in there!"

"I refuse to be fish food," Sanji muttered.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

"Right away!"

Brook looked out over the ocean as Sanji muttered to himself, rising to stand, brushing off his pants. "Maybe it's not you, Sanji, that's reaching for the stars."

"What?"

"Maybe when you find your peace, it's not _you_ that's actually looking for it. Maybe it's someone else's."

"But _I'm_ the one dumped here in the middle of nowhere with people I'm not even familiar with!"

"It's a complicated thing," Brook tittered.

"And don't talk like I'm dead, because I am obviously much too alive," Sanji muttered, leaving him to sit by himself. "But I _will_ be dead if I keep being told to do things around this stupid canoe!"

"Stop complaining, that will never happen!" Nami shouted back.

"But are you?" Brook asked, but Sanji was already descending from the rooftop, still complaining.

: :

The entrance to the aquarium on the second floor deck still scared him. With his pants rolled up to his knees, his dirty shirt in place, Sanji crouched at the edge and looked in. there was a light breeze in the air, so his hair fluttered around his face, causing him to brush at it absently. The water felt colder than the sea did – he touched it with his toes, hearing voices carry from the main deck below.

Fish swam by, their scales shimmering brilliantly for brief moments. He'd dropped the rags he intended on using into the water, positive he'd just drop down with them, but he didn't want to go. It wasn't very deep; it was narrow and shallow, but those fish terrified him. He didn't recognize them, so he didn't know if they were 'friendly'. He inhaled and exhaled heavily, trying to build up the courage to drop. Then felt the foot on his back.

" _Asshole_!" he shouted, catching himself on the hatch edges before Law could kick him in.

"Hurry up. How is it different from out there?" Law asked impatiently.

"There are actual _fish_ who could eat me, dammit. I'll push _you_ in there!" Sanji huffed, shifting away from the entrance. "Besides, what do you care if I do this?"

"I need to make sure that you do. Per Miss Nami's instructions."

"Yeah, right. Quit bullying me."

"This isn't bullying, Mr Blackleg. This is building character," Law said kicking him into the water with a strong push of his foot. Sanji fell in with an awkward flail, and the fish scattered to escape. He breathed in, then sputtered, surprised that he could do so. He ended up inhaling water. He coughed, flailed back to the doorway, and jerked himself out with a violent coughing and sputtering fit. Then realized he could touch the aquarium's second level flooring comfortably – due to the design of it, it was fitted as a ceiling over a hallway, and he looked down, realizing he could see the hallway floor through the glass. It made him feel foolish for reacting as he did.

When he looked at Law with a growl, he saw the other man's discolored lips twitch. But then they tightened again.

"Oh? So you _can_ drown. Did you ingest a Devil Fruit recently?" Law asked with indifference.

Sanji studied him for a few moments, wiping his hair from his face. He liked the way the reflection of the water shimmered over the other man's face. It made the discoloration of his skin that much more pronounced. Almost like he were a being from a watery dimension. He lowered himself to the water once more, glowering at him.

Then Sanji spit water at him, catching him in the face. He stumbled back with a curse, arm up as Sanji laughed at him.

"Take that, dumb ass!"

"You are willingly tasting water with trapped fish shit in it," Law snapped at him, causing Sanji to stop in mid laugh to consider this. He felt like puking, his mouth dropping open at the thought of it. " _Dumb_ ass."

He then kicked Sanji back into the water, and slammed the door shut. Then locked it. Sanji had enough air to breathe, but he couldn't believe the man's blatant bullying. He pounded on the door with his fist and vowed to get him back. Then he gathered up enough air he could hold in his lungs and pushed underneath the water. Though the water was clear and brilliant, and he could see just fine, the fact that the fish were actively watching him from a safe distance away made him wary. He crouched on the first level of the tank, then pushed down into the second level, maneuvering down to pick up one of the rags he dropped, then considered the glass wall. His lungs felt uncomfortably close to bursting, and he hadn't even done anything, yet.

He swam up to the slight space of air at the ceiling, gasping. The Sanji of this world had to be half fish. There was no possible way he could live up to be this guy. He pushed down from the ceiling and awkwardly swam to the glass pane. Then wiped the glass. It was so _pointless_. How was he even cleaning anything with just a rag? He was just smearing muck about with it. He looked at the rag, then at the glass, then blew out angry air bubbles, because how was this even a thing? He was pretty sure these people were just fucking with him.

Then he realized that Law was looking at him from the other side of the glass. He mimed cleaning the glass with one hand, then pointed at him, as if reminding Sanji that this was what he was supposed to be doing. Sanji tried to kick the glass, but his leg was moving through the water like it was molasses. He went up for air, came back down, then glared at the other man. He pushed up against the glass with both middle fingers, then pointed at him.

Law's eyes narrowed, then he turned and walked away.

It took several return trips to the ceiling to breathe, rest, and try again. But by the time he decided to give up, Luffy had opened the hatch and was waiting for him eagerly.

"Did you find anything good to eat down there, Sanji?" he asked, Sanji glowering at him as he pulled himself out, then collapsed onto the deck in a slump. Luffy sat atop of his back, relaxing back against the wall. Sanji was too tired to roll him off. "We're going to dock tonight, then roll into shore at the first hour! I'm sure Zoro's waiting for us!"

"Lovely. And, no, I didn't. I see there is a net there. Use that to catch something."

"I will!" Luffy moved, then watched as Sanji stood, shoulders slumped.

"I've never had to swim in my life, how is this possible?" Sanji complained, walking off as Luffy chuckled.

"I'll tell Nami to take it easy on ya!" he assured him.

Sanji headed back to the men's quarters. He was going to wash his clothes, dry them and definitely take a bath. This salty water made his skin dry and feel funny, but he found it odd that he had no signs of sunburn. He thought he'd been burn to a crisp, by now.

Hours later, he worked diligently in shaving ice into a container. Everyone was eating dinner, and he had a plan for revenge. He figured he'd eat after everyone left, because he was too tired to fend off Luffy's grabby hands. Once he had enough, he set it aside and then started clean up as the crew began to leave. Not even five minutes later, Law came in, and sat down at the table. Sanji continued to clean, sweeping the floor underneath the table. He had served lemonade earlier, so when he reached over to refill Law's glass, he reached for the container of ice as well. He moved to pour ice in when he reached over, pulled his shirt collar back, and dumped the entire thing down the back of his shirt.

Law nearly choked on his food, sputtered, then reached for his sword with a furious expression. Sanji ran out of there because there was no way he was even capable of dealing with a dude that could create blue light from his hand. He ran for the back of the second deck, hearing the rather inhuman snarling and demonic cursing behind him, and that light shimmered everywhere at once. He saw what Law could do whenever that happened, so he didn't even hesitate to throw himself overboard, into the water below.

He heard Luffy screaming for someone to _"Save Sanji_!" but he knew no one else could do it. He could see the Sunny's anchor chain nearby – he shifted in that direction, wondering why the water of the sea was so much different from that of the aquarium's. once he touched the chain, he used it to climb his way up, to poke his head cautiously from the water. Once Robin looked over the edge, he held a finger to his lips.

She smiled, and a set of lips popped out on the chain just above him. With a disgusted expression, Sanji looked at them. "I'll let you know when it's safe to come up. Whatever you did sent everyone running for cover."

"How inconvenient for me," Sanji said with a sigh, nonplussed. "Now I can't finish Nami's chores."

Robin chuckled, pushing away from the railing. "It's a good thing we're anchored, otherwise we would've lost Sanji in the sea forever, doctor. Surely whatever it was Sanji did, it doesn't warrant that much of a dangerous reaction. Maybe one of the boys has a spare shirt they could loan you while yours dries?"

Sanji reminded himself to make something special for her as he sunk back into the water, holding onto the anchor chain. Still, he didn't regret it. It was worth seeing that steely face expressing such shock at having ice dumped down his back. Maybe next time Law would reconsider following one of "Miss Nami's" orders.


	8. Chapter 8

**Naghitan: me too :D**

 **Lily: Yeah, getting distracted is a terrible idea. I do it a lot. It's a terrible habit. :D**

 **Guest #1: Those are really good theories! I like them! And, yeah, when does Law do something that someone asks of him. Suspect, right there. ;) Yes, in the end, the fic will have a terribly angsty conclusion**

 **Guest#2: Those are good theories, as well! He's starting to open up to Sanji, but in a way ya have to consider – when Sanji leaves, he leaves with Law's secrets. There's comfort in that, actually. His vulnerabilities remain hidden.**

 **Chapter Eight –**

Sanji had never given thoughts to pirates, before, other than to the Johnny Depp films that were popular. The tourist trap in Las Vegas. But ever since he was dropped into the midst of a dangerous situation, he felt he should've paid better attention to those things.

"Why are we not pulling up to the town? Why are we parallel parking in the back where people can't see us?" he asked as Franky dropped anchor in an unoccupied harbor.

"Because Nami said Zoro will be lost back here, somewhere," Luffy had answered.

Nami had Sanji write out a grocery list as they were coming into the area, and now gave him money. He had no idea what belli was. He stared down at the envelope with a blank expression while she marched off and scolded the other three for some misdeed.

"Ba _aaaabbbbbbbeeeerrrrr_ **guy** ," Sanji said, changing the automatic endearment into something that made the younger trio guess what he'd originally trying to say. He looked over to where Law was sitting, which was the stairway. Above the other's irritatingly loud predictions, he asked, "I need your assistance. I don't know what this means."

Law walked off with a scowl in his direction, saying nothing.

"You have to forgive me eventually!" Sanji shouted after him.

' _If you weren't so fucking pathetic maybe id' respect you more_.'

When the memory of seeing that text hit him, causing him to freeze in order to focus on it, Ussop snatched the envelope from his hands, and then the three of them were racing for the row boat. The action caused Sanji to forget the memory.

"Those are for _food_ supplies! And help Sanji!" Nami yelled after them, racing to the rail. Sanji was not going to jump or swing or fall the way the others were doing to the rowboat below – he crawled over the railing with a heaving sigh, and used the rope ladder to make his way down. Falling three feet from the ladder because Ussop realized he forgot something and tried to race up, and they collided in the middle.

" _Morons_ ," Nami muttered, shaking her head at the resulting shouts and screams. "Even if he's not from here, he fits in with those three the way our Sanji would."

"Maybe there isn't that much of a difference between other world Sanji, and ours," Robin mused. "Shall we go?"

"You'll be alright here by yourself?" Nami called after Law, who was making his way to the soldier's deck. His response was an impatient wave, and she looked at Robin. "Let's go."

: :

As soon as he touched down onto land, Sanji fell onto it with a relieved sigh. Luffy was racing around, shouting and screaming, occasionally running over Chopper as he ran in his own excited circle. Ussop was busy pointing out all the dangers that he could see from the sand, still standing in the rowboat. Sanji felt slight motion sickness, still expecting the feel of the ocean sway, but his feet had never been happier. He kicked off the tight shoes that he'd been wearing and buried his toes in the sand. Looking up at the bright blue sky, he smiled. The clouds were vague, the weather was _perfect_ , and he was certain a little sight seeing would do him some good. All the water was driving him crazy – or it could have been the crew itself.

By the time Nami and the others arrived, Franky pulling their rowboat up into the sand and anchoring it into place, Luffy was rolling in the sand like a little kid. Chopper was screaming at him, and Ussop was being chased by a dog sized crab. Sanji rolled over, wanting to take a nap.

"LET'S GO, NIMRODS! We're here for Zoro, and we're here for supplies! That is _it_! Don't _talk_ to anybody, don't look anyone in the eye, don't offend anyone by opening up your mouth! _Sanji_! You and Ussop are in charge of supplies! Chopper! In an hour, you go and assist them. LUFFY FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING, PLEASE PLEASE _PLEASE_ don't cause any trouble for the rest of us."

"Aye, aye!" all but Sanji shouted.

"We're going to find a spa, Franky needs a few things for the ship."

"Be careful, everyone!" Robin said, following after Nami, who looked at the log pose and a map.

The sights were something out of a commercial. People were friendly and smiled and spoke to one another with amicable greeting. Sanji was so used to people looking at their cellphones or keeping their eyes to themselves and saying nothing that this sort of atmosphere was refreshing. The day was beautiful, and while he felt out of shape for anything other than a stern walk, he felt pretty cheered at being able to stretch his legs and do something other than complete a chore list. He admired the sights around him with a happy expression, often asking Ussop a few questions; but he suspected half the time Ussop didn't know what the answers were, so he made up things that made Sanji completely convinced that the guy was incapable of speaking a truth.

He couldn't wait to return home to Law and tell him all about this. He wished he could take pictures, but he was afraid of losing power to his phone. He missed the other man, but he couldn't help but wonder if Law felt the same way. It was a startling thought. Maybe he was happier Sanji was gone. He tried not to feel morose about it, but he was convincing himself that the man was at least thinking of him, too.

An hour later, Ussop was haggling the price of a single apple with a food vendor. Sanji was looking at a block of meat with disgust, the seller looking at him with an insulted expression.

"All of this looks nasty," he told Ussop, setting the block aside.

"It looks fine to me when you cook it," Ussop said, looking at the meat in front of Sanji. "Usually, you ask them what type of animal it's from, what type of cut it is, what's the best local spices to use… it's a lengthy process. It's up to you what to do with it, but remember – we need to plan for a week's worth of travel. So you have to plan accordingly. Four meals a day, extra a day for our captain's needs."

Sanji looked at the list he held in one hand. Then he looked up and down the street stands available to him. He assumed that various buildings around were butchers, judging from the smells coming from them, the bloodstained men walking in and out.

"Okay. I can do this."

"Later."

"No, _wait_ \- !" he watched with consternation as Ussop took off like a shot. Growling, Sanji vowed to kick his ass when he came back. He looked back at the seller, then down at the meat. With a snotty expression, he asked, "What is it?"

Hours later, he was exhausted. Chopper had found him, helped him gather all the supplies into a massive burlap sack to carry back to the Sunny, and once they caught sight of Luffy racing after a hot dog vendor with a terrified expression, Chopper had raced after him. Sanji figured that as long as somebody had the supplies, he was in the clear. Mentally, he was bushed. He'd never had to haggle this sort of thing at a grocery store. He usually just picked up the packed meat and that was that. he turned it into a masterpiece later on. Not haggle about prices, cuts, and determination of animal. What went with that animal to produce a decent taste.

He was heading towards a clothes shop with what money – belli – he had left when he spotted the bar. For a few moments he stood outside of it, looking at it with interest. His mouth salivated.

 _It'd been a difficult week_ , he told himself. He went from a blackout at the bar to becoming a pirate crew's personal slave. Just a mug wouldn't hurt anything, or anybody. Besides, he couldn't drink by himself – it'd be better this way, knowing that he was in a strange place with strange people, and that was exactly what he needed in order to walk in.

Hours later, it was pitch black out, and his newest friends waved him off. Sanji was walking off with some new clothes, an extra pile of belli from betting on dart and pool games, and even a couple of spice jars for him to use because he'd grilled a few of the burly bandits some food. The streets were emptying of civilized people, and he was slightly unsteady on his feet. Every couple of steps, he would stumble off the side, and he noticed the chill in the air.

It was at this time that more of the memory came back to him.

'You're not going to vomit all over me again, are you?'

Sanji had laughed and laid over his lap, too drunk to sit up steady. He pretended to give Law a blowjob, but Law grabbed a handful of his hair and shoved him away, causing Sanji to laugh again, resting his head down on his thigh and turning his head the other way.

'Wow, he's already smashed,' Nami said with concern, beer mug empty.

'Get him another one, he'll pass right out,' Zoro said, finishing off his own.

'True friends make you drink until you die,' Ussop commented sarcastically.

'Another round!' Shachi cried, waving his money in the air.

'Another round!' Nami shouted. 'Fireball me!'

'Another round!' Sanji cried, but the words didn't come out right. When he looked at Law, the man looked pissed and uncomfortable, but Sanji thought that Law was just spoiling the fun with his attitude. Plus he kept looking over Sanji's head, and Sanji didn't feel good about it, because he knew who he was looking at.

'If you're going to spew, spew into this,' Ussop said, snickering as he passed him a folded paper cup from his pocket.

'You waited for this moment all night, didn't you?' Zoro asked him.

When the waitress came back, all of them took the glasses with cheers. Law tried to push Sanji's glass out of his grasp, but Sanji pushed his glass back, and both of them ended up spilling most of the contents on their shirts.

Sanji sniffled and wiped his nose. He remembered most of that part, now. All their demons emerged when their control disappeared. And between them, both of them had demons that most often lunged and snapped at each other.

He felt for certain Law wasn't missing him at all at this point. Not if the evening had continued like that.

He nearly walked into a street post, then giggled because it had been a close call. He cleared his throat and straightened up, walking for the path that had led him into the town. It was a combination of old time settings with modern day sprinkles. The buildings looked old and grand, barely three stories high; there were brick lined streets and beautifully formed sidewalks with mosaic style stone settings. Everyone wore flowy shirts and nipped pants, and there were turbans, bandannas, dull gold jewelry. Straw sandals were on the feet of everyone he passed.

Which made him look down at his feet with a start, remembering that he'd taken his shoes off a long time ago, when they'd pulled up to the beach. No wonder some of the men were trying to give him boots.

He thought about this world's Law at that moment – was it cheating if he was admiring another version of the man he loved? He was only looking. He was a healthy man that had once had a healthy appetite, and he appreciated the sight of other men.

But then this one was so closed up and stiff that Sanji doubted he'd even known the touch and affection of another person. He often complained and snapped when Luffy hung on him, dragging him across the deck to show him something, and the way he reacted when Sanji touched him a few times told Sanji that this man could not handle physical contact.

But he himself missed contact, as well. He missed feeling important and valued, and it had been _so long_ since Law had touched him in a nice, caring way.

He stopped walking, fists balling up in his jacket.

'Stop looking at him when I'm in front of you, you cheater,' Sanji said to Law, mouth barely moving.

'Who, your brother?' Law asked with irritation, pushing him off his lap, embarrassed by his loud voice and touchy mannerisms.

Sanji sat up, but had to lean on him again, slurring, 'I don't care.'

Law used a shoulder to push him away. 'You will when he tells the others.'

Sanji leaned in close to say into his ear, ' _I don't care_.'

Law pushed his face away with an irritated expression. 'You should've told them a long time ago.'

Sanji poked his forehead with a finger, and Law grabbed that finger and bent it backward so hard that Sanji cried out, retracting it. But he said, 'They don't care.'

'I think you've had too much,' Law said to him, taking the glass out of his hand.

'That was my last one! Give it back! If I'm going to stop drinking, let this be the very last one!' Sanji had whined, sitting up. When he couldn't get what he wanted, he slapped him, and Law snatched his hand from the air and shoved him hard. Sanji barely caught himself, but he slapped him again. He laughed when Law grabbed that hand and shoved it back into his face.

'That's what you said the last time, and the last time before that! Goddamn it, I don't want to carry you home, again!'

'Just call a fucking taxi! Send me away by myself! That's what responsible people do! Send me to Hong Kong!'

In a city he couldn't even identify, Sanji reached up to touch his forehead, shaking his head in disgust. He felt so embarrassed and low for himself. The more things came back to him, the more he felt of the ugliness inside of him that made him feel as if he were missing something very significant. Remembering how physical they could be with each other – with him most often instigating it, drunk off his ass – made him wonder if the type of relationship that they had was something that made him feel this ugly. He was almost afraid to continue delving into it.

He continued walking, stumbling slightly. But as he did so, he could clearly see himself reaching out for the snow flakes that fell.

A screech of tires on pavement alerted him to movement, and he looked down to see his brothers pull up to his apartment, leaving their car parked in the emergency fire zone. The three of them moved briskly, with grim faces, and they were moving up the stairway with heavy footfalls. Sanji remembered, with a sullen frown, seeing Yonji catch sight of him hanging all over Law last night. He was too hung over for this, right now.

He went for his cellphone, and tapped out a message. 'Where are you?'

He walked back inside and shut the sliding door as one of them pounded at the front door. It wouldn't keep the three of them out for very long.

'I'm at work,' came the reply.

" _Cook_."

Sanji lifted his head up with a startled jerk, sluggishly registering the man stepping out from the nearby bathhouse. The memory faded away quickly, nothing but a fleeting image and a jumble of fading noise. He paused in mid-step, almost amazed at the sight of his friend in pirate form.

"Zoro."

Zoro looked at him for some time. Then rubbed his eye. Sanji stared at him in fascination, wondering what happened to his other eye. This man looked vicious compared to the man he knew. The one he knew was skinnier than this version – all ropey muscle and lanky strength, with a long flattop and a casual wear that made him complain. This one wore some sort of samurai outfit with scars, muscle and an aura of dangerousness to his entire being.

"You look like something that stepped right out of a Men's Health magazine!" Sanji exclaimed with awe, hands to his cheeks.

"Is this…some sort of… _Duval_?" Zoro asked skeptically, looking him up and down. "Are you Duval?"

"No. I'm Sanji. Look, it's a long story. I'm headed back to the ship. I know the way, so please follow me, sir."

Zoro wasn't sure if he should follow. Two of his swords were vibrating, eking small noises of warning. But the man wearing flowing clothes that barely concealed a heavier frame and with a clearly drunken gait gave him a sense of familiarity. He didn't see any other member of the crew, and he was pretty certain that he wasn't being lead to a trap. His senses were too keen, and he was too aware – he had to trust his instincts.

"So, what's this about?" Zoro asked, smelling the alcohol on the other man as the breeze shifted his way. It was very unlike Sanji to drink – he was such a lightweight. "Heard you were a runaway bride."

Sanji understood that this world's cook had escaped a horrible fate. "That's something for Nami and the others to talk to you about. I don't know anything about it."

"Are you some sort of imposter?"

"It's the other way around, for me. I don't appreciate being kidnapped and forced to work for the likes of you people. I'm just trying to make my way home," Sanji said.

Zoro walked quietly for some time, a little thrown off by Sanji's drunken stumbling. Then he realized he wasn't wearing any shoes. What was even more puzzling was the footprints being left behind.

"Did you step in something?" he asked, looking back. Sanji turned and looked, frowning as he squinted at the trail following after them. It almost like congealed oil, or oily water. They seemed to fade after awhile, much like how water did when it dried. He looked at his feet curiously, but there was nothing there.

"No. I would've felt it."

Zoro's swords vibrated in hand, and he tried to calm them.

"Are you a demon of some sort?" he asked cautiously.

"That would explain some things, you would think," Sanji mused. "But I'm not. I'm pretty sure of it. I have a pulse, and I'm warm, and I see my reflection. Also, I can drown in aquarium water, but not sea water."

"Huh. Those are pretty weird. So what are you?"

"I don't know. I took the place of your cook. I just want to go home. I have friends that are looking for me. To be honest, this is really the most strangest adventure I've ever had. And we went to Burning Man, which is the weirdest of the weird!"

"I don't know what that is."

"Something tells me that a man like you should avoid going," Sanji murmured thoughtfully.

' _It's time for you to go home_ ,' Zoro had said.

'Why do _I_ have to go? Why does _he_ get to stay? It's not fair, because I know exactly why you're doing this!' Sanji had protested, no match against Zoro's strength as he pulled him out of the club, and hailed a taxi. He stumbled along behind him. 'I'm going home by myself? It's not _fair_!'

'Just go home and pass out. It'll be easier for the rest of us.'

'You mean, easier for _you_ now that I'm out of the way,' Sanji snapped as a taxi pulled up, and Zoro gave the address as he stuffed Sanji in the back seat. Sanji kicked him, catching him in the face and having him stumble back. 'Boyfriend stealer! He steals people's boyfriends! Put an APB out on him! Thief! Thief!'

'If you weren't such a fucking mess, then this would've never happened,' Zoro told him, slamming the door as the taxi pulled away.

The sound of the memory faded, and Sanji fell into uncomfortable silence. He looked over at the man that looked around them with an indifferent expression, strolling along as if this were just a walk in the park. His chest felt uncomfortably full and tight.

He didn't want to think about it, anymore. This world's Zoro had no connection with his world's. He shouldn't think of him in any other way other than what he was given, now.

Once they caught sight of the shore, Sanji was relieved to see a rowboat sitting there for them.

"You're not smoking," Zoro said.

"I smoke a lot. I just haven't had the time, now," Sanji said with a sigh. "Nami's run me ragged."

"I hate to say this out loud, but you're definitely not…I hope you can still fight."

"Just say it, Zoro. Everyone else has."

"You're a fatty."

"And no, the last time I fought with anybody was with my brothers," Sanji said before he could ask, sensing the question.

In the back of his mind, the locks to his front apartment door rattled as one of his brothers began kicking it.

He watched as the chain caught the door, Ichiji cursing as the wood slapped him in the face upon its rebound.

Niji laughed.

"Then what do they have you doing?" Zoro asked curiously, over the memory.

"Whatever you want a slave to do. Now, if you want to get to the ship faster, you should row. Because I have no ability to do that at all," Sanji said, climbing into the boat. Then he climbed out, hurrying through the sand to find his shoes. Zoro waited for him to help him push the boat out into the water, and when they climbed in, he saw it was odd how the water changed at his feet. For a moment, it wasn't Sanji's reflection that was there. He could've sworn it was someone else's.

He looked at the man again, but Sanji had settled himself on the bench seat and said with a disappointed frown, "This place is called Windmill Island, right? I haven't seen one since I got here."

"The island is in shape of one," Zoro answered patiently. Then gave him a bewildered look as Sanji blew in the direction of the island, laughing at himself, nearly falling out as he tipped the boat to the side.

: :

Nami was pissed as soon as they crawled over the railing. Luffy and the others swarmed Zoro with happy shouts and cheered greetings, but she looked at Sanji with irritation. She leaned over to smell him, then held her hand out. He gave her the belli that he'd received, and she counted it in front of him with a puzzled expression.

She then reached out and pushed his shoulder impatiently. "NO one said you could wander off and buy yourself a drink, or twenty. There's a reason we all stick together! You could've put yourself into mortal danger! Endangered us!"

"But I didn't. nothing happened. I made friends. They all thought I was some slummy traveler and not a pirate slave."

"You said drinking gets you in trouble!"

"It does."

"Then why do it in another world where you aren't even safe?" she asked, exasperated.

"It was a stupid idea. But I couldn't help myself."

"You might think we're repressing you, or blowing it all out of our asses, but we're warning you not to do certain things because we'd already learned how bad of an idea they are. So don't disregard our warnings so easily."

It made sense. So Sanji felt pretty low for making the decision he did.

 _I'm just a worthless mess_.

"I'm going to go put my clothes away," he then said, yawning noisily as he walked towards the men's quarters.

"Nami, what's up with that?" Zoro asked her, his captain hanging from his back, Chopper clinging to one leg, Brook laying over his shoulders with a jolly laugh.

"It's a really weird story. The basics of it is that he's with us until we can figure out how to get him home, and get our Sanji back," she explained. "Be careful, okay? He's not the one we're used to. Has a real attitude."

"Brook thinks he's a ghost!" Chopper told him.

"I think he's a ghost," Brook said.

"I think he's just sad," Luffy contributed.

"I think he's lazy," Nami said.

"I think he's very honest," Robin admitted.

"He could use some work," Franky contributed with a nod.

"What's the other guy think?" Zoro asked. "He's here, right? Bastard took off when I suggested doing this, like he doesn't need any other training than what he has."

"I'm not wasting my time on frivolous things," he heard Law mutter from somewhere near the main mast.

"There's no such thing as too much training to make yourself stronger! Anyway, is this imposter alright to you?" Zoro asked him.

"My thoughts on the matter are irrelevant. Can we continue on with the plan?"

Zoro looked at Nami with a shrug. "Well, whatever, if you guys are cool with this sort of thing, then let's get it straightened out, tomorrow. If you picked up a sea demon, then you need to make the decision to tolerate it, but put it back when you can."

"That's interesting," Robin said. "Do they exist?"

"But it was the apples that brought him here," Chopper said.

"Whatever. The point is, I'm tired. I want to sleep. But I want to sleep knowing that I'm not going to be fighting some demon off in my sleep."

"You'll be fine. He hides out a lot because Nami makes him do stuff. Let's hit the hay, everyone. We've got a long day ahead of us. I'm glad you're safe, buddy," Luffy said, hugging Zoro tightly from behind. "There's so much you missed out on that you need to catch up on!"

"Yeah, it's good to be back," Zoro said with relief, patting his arms.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: I hd a hard time writing this BECAUSE I AM SO HAPPY OMG GAZE UPON SIBERIANWINDS' TUMBLR for more fanart from 'White Rabbit'. I can't write angst for a few days. I'm too happy. TOO FUCKING HAPPY.**

 **Guest#1: It's very sad, indeed. Haha! Yes, I know you don't want to see that pairing…**

 **Naghitan: It'll hurt even more**

 **Guest#2: it's okay to ramble – I enjoy hearing from what readers' think, especially with a fic as intense as this. You have a very good scenario going on, there, and I'm sure it'll all make sense in the end. This chapter will sting a bit.**

 **Chapter Nine –**

In the morning, Sanji caught himself staring at the changing colors of the sky. Leaning against the railing, chin on palm, he watched the stars slowly fade as the horizon began to warm with color. The silence of the ship made things easier to sort through.

He reached out to catch a few flakes on the palm of his hand.

'I'm at work,' came the reply.

The locks rattled as one of them began kicking it.

Sanji knew in his heart that was a lie. He covered his face with one shaking hand, trying to compose himself. Then he began writing again. 'I'm sorry for being such an idiot. I wish I was a bttr person.'

'If you weren't so fucking pathetic maybe id' respect you more.'

Sanji wiped his hair behind his ears. He was used to those words. He made it difficult for himself when he picked up a bottle. 'I kno, I'm sorry.'

'You drink too much.'

He watched as the chain caught the door, Ichii cursing as the wood slapped him in the face upon its rebound. ' _I'm trying to stop_.'

With a heavy exhale, he pulled the phone from his pocket, unwrapping it as he slowly sat, leaning against the railing. Once it was powered on, he realized that the battery life had dropped to 54%. He didn't understand how some days it seemed to rise, and the others were falling. But he hugged it close to his chest, feeling ugly from deep within himself. The memory he saw felt vivid, now, and he could only remember how horrid he felt, being alone and knowing where his Law was.

He looked through the roll of photos, looking for a positive sign, something to tell him that he was wrong. But he had to acknowledge that they had been headed for an ending, anyway. So why was he here? If he could pierce together his memories, find out where the beginning started and see the last of his days –

 _The last memory_ he had before arriving here.

Not the 'last of his days'. No, that wasn't the right thing. This crew was influencing him too much. But to be honest, with the heavy feelings in his chest, he did feel a little dead.

He was startled when he felt the vibration of a booted step nearby, the sound of it carrying just a moment later.

"Are you receiving orders?"

"The aliens are in communication with me," Sanji said gravely, holding his phone up to the sky. "They wanted me to deliver a message to you, and you only."

" 'Aliens'?

"A technologically advanced civilization from the stars. And they wanted you to know that they are pleased with your growth pattern, but worry about the condition of your high asshole levels. They want you to lower it, a bit, before they can come pick you up."

Law gave him a disgusted expression. "I'm in no mood for your jokes today, Mr Blackleg."

"Are you _ever_ in the mood for anything but heavy brooding?" Sanji asked, rolling onto his stomach with a light grunt, phone held in both hands. There was a heavy splash of sound from the right, and he lowered his head, thinking that there was another one of those kid-changing beasts roaming around.

"No. Now that Mr Roronoa is back, I suspect this trip will move a lot faster to our intended destination. You may not give our goal much thought, but since you are only a traveler from another world, delaying the inevitable, your contribution to our bodily well being is acceptable, and so I will forgive you this time."

Sanji grinned up at him brightly, delighted by the vague compliment and truce. "Yeah, hey, thanks! I'm glad someone appreciates the work I do around here!"

"With having said that, I suggest our food should be prepared early. We've a lot to go over, and I do not want Strawhat or the others distracted by your interruptions."

"I'm pretty sure it's the other way around," Sanji mumbled, looking at his phone once more. In that space of time, the percentage had risen to 56%. He held it an arm's length away from him, unable to understand where the energy came from when he hadn't even plugged it in. Then, with a curious expression, he held it in Law's direction. The man was wearing those weird pants again, with a black hooded shirt that had his Jolly Roger on it, hat brim low. His ever constant sword at his side, held at thigh level.

"What are you doing, now?"

"The signal dropped. They lost communication with me. I'm now in the blind. As a result, you'll have to deal with me for a little longer."

"Mr Roronoa suspects that you are a sea demon."

"But I don't eat people," Sanji said, hugging the phone to his chest once more. "I tried. Too chewy. Especially skinny guys."

Law frowned at him, and Sanji watched his expression, amused because it looked like Law was trying to see if he were serious or not.

"Maybe with ketchup, and filler parts," Sanji decided, rolling over onto his back and laying the phone over his chest so he could watch the sky change.

"Sea demons are possible in this world."

"In mine, they're called celebrities on yachts."

"They lure pirates to the sea, and drown them."

"Aren't they called sirens?"

"So, are you?"

"No. Pretty positive I'm not. I'm just a regular man with regular goals and a failed relationship," Sanji said with a heavy sigh. "Besides, my singing is absolutely horrid. Simon Cowell would scream at me to stop from halfway around the world."

Law looked as if he had nothing to say, but his eyebrows pulled together. Sanji couldn't resist singing horribly, "'But if I know youuuu, I'll know what you'll do, you'll love me at once, the way you did once upon ah dreeeaaaamm!'"

"We're under attack!" they heard Ussop scream. "They're killing people out there!"

Sanji tried not to laugh at the utterly exasperated expression Law made at the sounds that followed, of a certain trio that woke way too early.

"Look, I just want to get home so I can figure it out, and try to save my relationship. I'm sure this is a lesson for me. the lesson being that me and alcohol need to part ways. _Stat_. This is probably the only way that I can do that."

"How long did it take for you to come to that conclusion? When you took it upon yourself to drink stove cleaner out of the bottle to satisfy a taste, or for the fact that you've done nothing to improve yourself as a person in an unknown setting? If there is a lesson for you to learn, you're not doing a thing about it, Mr Blackleg. In that regard, please make breakfast. It'll be a long day."

With that, Law walked off, sword resting against his shoulder. Sanji flipped him off with a frustrated expression, and was very annoyed when it was returned to him. Huffing, he looked at his phone to turn it off, but was puzzled by the battery percentage. 52%.

"I don't get it!" Sanji complained, powering it down and rewrapping it in plastic. Then he continued to stare up at the sky, watching light clouds drift by, carried by a wind that he couldn't feel. He felt his expression slowly grow heavy as he watched the sky change with the rising sun.

What did he have to do in order to get back home? And why couldn't he remember anything other than what was given to him?

'If you weren't such a fucking mess, then this would've never happened,' Zoro told him, slamming the door as the taxi pulled away.

 _Yeah, there's that_ , Sanji thought drunkenly, slumping against the other door as the cab driver winced, hoping he didn't throw up. _I'm just a worthless mess_.

He exhaled heavily, listening to the splash again. He turned his head to look over, but all he saw was the bright blue sea through the railing.

Maybe Law was right. Maybe his lesson here was to be a better person. And maybe he was sent here to learn from his mistakes. Maybe if he did turn himself around, and have people look at him differently, maybe he'd be able to go home. He'd have to put this to the test.

He sat up to go start breakfast, and realized something was moving at the corner of his eye. It was one of those damn sea things, again, peering through the railing. Its eyelids blinked, and then it coiled upward and hissed before spitting water directly at him. He hurriedly stood and ran into the kitchen as it shrieked with frustration, causing the windows to rattle, and for Luffy to scream out with joy once he caught sight of Sanji making his escape.

"SMOL SANJI!"

First thing on Sanji's list, he decided, looking down at himself with disgust, was improving his survival instincts.

: :

Brook was singing the one line that Sanji had screeched out hours earlier, and he used the tune to twist it into some bawdy tale that sounded suspiciously like partying with a bunch of hookers. He sprayed him with the hose, and Brook choked and sputtered, bow screeching off the violin strings. He gave him the correct lyrics, then finished spraying off the lawn area as Brook sang the song correctly.

He supposed that the planning meeting didn't go as Law wanted it, to. Luffy was once again napping on the lion's head, Chopper was chasing after Ussop, who had what looked like a large venus flytrap clamped down on his arm; Nami was arguing with Zoro over a list that she shook at him impatiently, Zoro was complaining about it, and Law was off glaring at the sea with a furious expression to his face. Franky and Robin were in some workshop down below, Franky wanting her input on some contraption he was working on.

Just another day on the Sunny, he supposed. He was set to put his plan in motion. Already he'd been a success at breakfast – he'd served everyone mid-meal snacks and finished laundry, helped Ussop with some sort of chemical experiment, cleaned out Chopper's office – so much fur! – and offered to help Zoro move his weights because he intended on cleaning out that room, but that had been a disaster. He had such a hard time climbing up there being as 'smol' as he was, so when Zoro offered to carry him, Luffy wanted to help, and all three of them ended up in the sea.

What was even more odd about the situation was that Sanji nearly drowned. And the sea didn't look as it did when he was his regular size. It was a beautiful shade of blue, and there were different types of school of fish that fluttered around, with sea debris visible at the very bottom – which was so far away – that Sanji stopped panicking and looked around himself with awe. Luffy had to be saved immediately, Zoro swimming after him, but as Sanji floated there in the waters, he couldn't help but be captivated by the sights around him. It wasn't the same sort of peace he felt before, but something else. Then he swam for the surface as he realized he needed to breathe, and by the time he popped out from the waves, sputtering and gasping for air, Zoro was right behind him with Luffy over his shoulder.

After that, Sanji had a lot on his mind. Was the phone somehow connected to his trips to the sea? Or was it to Law himself? It seemed that every time he talked to Law, he noticed his battery life shifted. So, in that sense, why would it do that?

They would have interesting conversations, his Law and himself. That was how they met.

Sanji looked up at the sky, furrowing his brow. He thought. How did they meet?

'I tripped.'

'No, you didn't.'

Sanji realized he had no memory of that moment at all. He should have. After all, what was more significant than the memory of meeting one's loved one? He dropped the hose, and sat on the wood as Brook sat down with him. Sanji looked at his phone again, and looked through the photo rolls.

A cold realization settled in his stomach as he did so. He realized that he'd only been looking at pictures from the night out. Nothing past it. He was sure there were more pictures on the phone than that.

He looked at the messaging app again, and saw the last message: 'Are you ready?'

"It appears that Nami's workload has reduced your figure, Sanji," Brook said cheerfully. Sanji gave him a blank look, then looked down at himself with alarm. In front of everybody, he was only wearing a flowy shirt. He yelped, pulling the hem as low as it could go, and shuffled off towards the men's quarters. Once he found some clothes that were given to him from yesterday, he looked at the set he'd arranged on a hanger. The bowtie, vest, white shirt, jeans and belt. What was strange was that the stain was bigger, darker. Pulling it out to the light, it looked like he'd spilled something over the collar, and it had spread from there to his arms, over his chest and stomach.

"Did you kill someone wearing those things?" Zoro asked him curiously from the doorway, able to see what Sanji was looking at.

"It's a weird stain. And, no, I didn't," Sanji scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous."

"Maybe someone killed you, then."

"Probably. That would explain this world. I'm trapped in some sort of purgatory for the things I've done."

Zoro looked at him cautiously, arms folded over his chest, inside his robe. Sanji put the set back and slammed the locker shut. He walked over to Zoro and hunched over in a bow.

"How may I serve you, my liege?"

"Shut up, ass. I don't need anybody serving me!"

"Well, if you don't want anything, I've been instructed to clean out the library. I'll be there. _don't_ holler if you need anything." Sanji then paused in mid-step, heaved a huge sigh, then corrected himself. "Scream if you need anything."

"This really bothers you, doesn't it?" Zoro observed. "You know, our Sanji had no problem serving that dumb ass witch. He volunteered for everything without complaint, unless it was something we requested of him."

" _This_ Sanji thinks it's bullshit. The first day I arrived, I was put to work. Not only was I confused and afraid and alone, I had to do things that others could've done for themselves! I mean, sure, I don't mind helping anybody out, but upon reasonable request!"

"where are you from, anyway?"

"Not this world. In mine, we don't have powers. You don't carry swords. I've never even sailed on a boat. We work boring jobs and hang out at bars until three in the morning."

"That doesn't sound like any fun at all."

"Not to you guys, here, no. But it was my life, and I didn't have that much of an imagination to imagine this sort of thing. We relied on movies for that."

"Well, I hope you find your way back home. I'm sure your friends miss you."

"I don't know…I might've left on very bad terms. Maybe I'll never find my way back home," Sanji mumbled, walking off. He didn't see Luffy jumping down from the soldier's dock, and both of them crashed to the deck with shouts and screams.

Zoro winced.

: :

In the library, Sanji found some peace and quiet. So he took advantage of it. He shifted Nami's maps aside and began writing out what he remembered, creating a timeline for himself. He started with the text message – 'Are you ready?' – and ended with the very last one he could remember; 'I'm trying to stop.'

But there were very large chunks in all of it. The bar scene seemed unfinished. But he could see for himself that he'd caused a scene of some sort. He made notations in that area. Then there was the memory of his brothers coming to his apartment, trying to break down the door.

He leaned back in the chair, thinking of them. But what struck him as odd as that while the three of them were familiar to him as brothers – quadruplets – he could not remember why he feared them finding out his and Law's relationship. Judging from the memory, it was probably just a hate thing – he was the black sheep of the family, he embarrassed them, yadda yadda yadda.

Something happened, then, that caused him to not remember much else. Of course, he figured it had to be something violent. He woke up that morning, hungover and sick – he was wearing that outfit, that night. He made that notation on the board. He didn't remember being dropped off by the cab driver – black out – so he must've just passed out in it.

'His apartment', but he was looking for Law's car in the parking lot. Did they live apart?

He tapped his fingers atop of the table top.

The violence between them in his drunken memory did not surprise him in any way. He didn't feel as if it were a new thing.

'I tripped.'

'No, you didn't.'

It made him feel sad and ugly that perhaps things weren't what he thought they were. Talking of warm memories to Law the other day, were they just a fantasy? Or was it a memory?

He stared out the window.

And this thing at the bar, with him, Law and Zoro…he felt familiar with it, too. He felt that something had happened. Something he already knew about. Something he couldn't help but bitter over.

"It was only supposed to be us, Pooh Bear," he murmured. "What a pair, me and you. Can't live with each other, can't live without."

Were the talks of engagement ever real, too? Or were they his own fantasy?

Even after all that?

Why would he even think this man would want him after these memories had come to life? Was he that delusional?

He put his head in his hands. He wished he could remember more.

"I want to go home!" he complained low. He then pulled up the sheet of paper, folded it, and put it in his pocket. Then he went in search of the other man. Once he found him, napping near the soldier's dock, he crouched in front of him, reaching out with his index finger in the measured spot.

"Wake up," he demanded firmly, Law jerking awake immediately, and then reacting with a vicious snarl when his nose touched Sanji's outstretched finger. " _Boop_."

"GET AWAY FROM ME."

"You can't kill a sea demon," Sanji reminded him, sitting cross legged in front of him as Law pulled his legs up, calming his breathing because Sanji didn't know that he shouldn't sneak up on somebody as war-torn as this world's Law was. "Because if you do, we'll multiply like bed bugs. Look, I have to ask you something."

"Don't you have some ass to kiss?"

"Not in this world. I wrote out a timeline of all the things that happened before I woke up, here, and I need your input. It has to be you," Sanji added, folding his hands in front of him. He took a deep breath, then asked, "Please compliment me."

Law gave him a puzzled look, shifting his sword from one shoulder to the other.

"A sincere one."

"I have absolutely none for you."

"Is that because you're not a positive person?"

"It's because there is nothing about you that I can find that immediately makes me want to compliment you."

"I bet it's because you haven't been complimented before, is it? See, here's the conclusion that I came to – in seeing these memories of mine, I was…rather… _annoying_. And I deliberately made my live-in very uncomfortable. Whether it was just the environment that I was familiar with, or that…I'm really that bad of a person, I deliberately pushed their buttons for them to react. And their reaction was something I needed, at the time, which, in hindsight, was their _attention_. I felt I didn't have it enough."

"And so, because you're a terrible person, you think you deserve a compliment? What does this have to do with me, Mr Blackleg? As I've said, I've nothing for you."

"So, _look_ , both of us, and this is just between us, we sit here and compliment each other, because I think both of us need it."

"No."

" _Why_?"

"Because it doesn't count if we are strangers."

"Even strangers want to hear kind words from somebody. But technically, we aren't."

"We _are_ , because I know nothing about you, and you know nothing about me. It doesn't matter if each of us resembles someone familiar – we're still different people."

"In any event, I think both of us are stretching for some sort of positive contact from _somebody_ ," Sanji said. "Look, I'll start first – "

"I don't want to do this. Leave me alone. I don't want your company."

"But I want yours. _Please_!"

Sanji reached out for his ankle as he stood, intending on walking away. Law used the heel of his boot to grind his fingers down onto the deck and Sanji retracted his hand with a yelp. He watched him walk away, struggling to swallow the lump of frustration building in his throat. Maybe the reason why he couldn't reach Law here was because this was how they were back there. maybe he was destined to fail repairing things between them. Maybe they were done for. What if he returned home, and they were already separated?

What would be the point of returning home, then?

He licked his lips. Then looked at his phone with a startled action, to see if his theory was correct.

He was startled to see that the percentage level had dropped to 40%. He felt sick to his stomach. What happens when the phone completely died? What was causing it to lose its energy in this fashion?

With a worried expression, he turned the phone off, and rewrapped the plastic. He felt his heart ache. He felt lonely, sad. He looked out at the sea, the breeze brushing through his hair like invisible fingers.

Had he created so much conflict that there wasn't any sign of redemption?

: :

After they anchored the Sunny for the night, and everyone had turned into their beds, Sanji jumped over the railing and into the sea. The immediate peace caused him to fill with relief. The starry void stripped him of all his heavy thoughts, of all his anguished feelings, and he held his knees to his chest, content to feel absolutely nothing. Time left him alone.

When he closed his eyes, he didn't hear past conversations or see buried memories. He floated in static peace and quiet, the image of the starry sky imprinted on the back of his eyelids. He didn't have to breathe, he didn't have to panic, he had nobody to fight off.

When the brilliant light of the flare caught his attention, he watched it sail past him. All he wanted was this silence. He did have to wonder, though, was this what it felt like to give up? He was tired of trying to figure it all out.

Maybe the Strawhat crew should leave him here. Let the sea demon return to the sea so the other one could return.

He moved to close his eyes, but there was another flare deposited into the sea, and he watched this one float slowly past him. Beyond that, he could see the morning sky. Building clouds, the waves splashing against the Sunny's bottom. Compared to it, he was just a ragdoll in the starry void. The anchor chain was in the distance, and the anchor itself had disappeared into some pretty dark depths beyond his reach.

As the sun lifted into his vision, he thought of how the aquarium water reflected off the other man's face. He wondered how a disease could scar another person's skin that way. He wondered what it felt like. He wondered what Law thought of when he was by himself, looking at the sea with an angry expression.

His Law was the same way, sometimes. He fought with depression because his home life hadn't been that great. Sanji couldn't remember why. But he remembered seeing the man sitting on the couch with a far off expression to his face, and Sanji remembered feeling so scared to lose him. He remembered laying his head on his lap, and reaching up to run his fingers over his face, telling him over and over that it was _just them_ , and _just they_ could do this _together_ –

He gave a frustrated expression. The pull was just too great. He uncurled himself and swam down – up – to the surface, breaking through the growing waves to find the rope ladder. He made his way up – looking around him for any more of those infuriating creatures – and realized that he'd been down there for way too long. Nami was cooking, Luffy was bothering her, and Robin was looking at him with a frown.

"Sorry," he apologized, climbing onto the deck. "I just went for a swim."

"Neglecting your duties doesn't help this crew," Law snapped at him, stalking off.

Sanji felt rotten for disappointing him, but he looked at Robin with an apologetic air. She walked into the kitchen to assure the others that he'd returned, and Luffy cried out with joy, yelling at him to come rescue Nami.

But Sanji walked towards the back deck, and pulled the phone out from his pocket. He was dismayed to see it had lowered to 28%. But it had to be because of the water. It didn't feel wet. It wasn't cold. He re-wrapped it and hurried around the structure to the men's quarters to take a quick shower and change, hearing Zoro bellow for him impatiently, Ussop screaming for a fire extinguisher.

He paused for several moments at his locker, looking at his outfit. The stains were darker, and they pretty much covered the front of his shirt, soaked his vest, and even his bowtie looked mangled. With worry, he gathered up the hangar and outfit, and looked for a bag. He found one near the washing machine and stuffed it inside.

'Can't stand looking at you, sometimes.'

'I c that.'

'You act like such an idiot when you drink, it's embarrassing.'

'I wish I could have made you as happy with me as I am with you.'


	10. Chapter 10

**Naghitan: There is that…**

 **Guest#1: it was a terribly strong chapter.**

 **SiberianRS: But he still has a ways to go…he can't give up, now (as much as he wants to) it was more than a sting, but it won't be the last! D:**

 **Lily: you are right about the cellphone charge, but what makes it move? A conversation, or a clue? Eventually, he'll find what he's looking for, but in doing so, he has to remember *correctly what had happened in order to get to his goal.**

 **A/N: This is the last chapter for the weekend. But it's definitely a game changer. I really enjoy hearing everyone's theories! They're very creative and it's amazing how involved ya'll are with the story!**

 **Chapter Ten –**

Night fell quietly – the crew decided on a bonfire, and as that was going, Sanji silently passed out the necessary ingredients for s'mores. He kept thinking about the phone. What was going to happen when it hit 0%? Would he be taken back home? Or would he be taken elsewhere to places he couldn't even fathom?

 _Why_ was he here in the first place?

He impatiently helped Luffy reload his skewer with a new piece of marshmallow, and barely managed to pull his hand back in time as Chopper nearly bit him for helping Luffy. The pair of them argued, fighting over position in front of the fire, and Zoro snapped at them both. Somehow, his robe caught fire, and Ussop, appointed fireperson, sprayed him with the fire extinguisher. He lost control of it, tossed backward, spraying Nami with white foam, and she shrieked with outrage.

Luffy laughed uproariously, Chopper taking the chance to eat what was left of his marshmallow, then screaming in pain as the gooey mess wasn't completely cooled off.

 _Idiots_ , Sanji thought morosely, standing in the middle of it all. He gave Robin a new piece of chocolate, to which she formed a perfect s'more, and gave it to Franky.

"Did you learn anything new about those apples?" he then asked Robin, who gave him a solemn shake of her head.

"I've looked through a great majority of my most reliable sources regarding possible enchanted fruits, but I've yet to find anything matching the description of this particular apple," she answered. "Also, the messenger bird has yet to return with the information I'd requested. I'm afraid you're stuck with us for just a little while longer."

"That's unfortunate for you," he mumbled. "I really need to get home, now. I'm sure my friends are worried."

She looked at him with concern. "Why do you not sound so convinced of it?"

"Too much thinking, I suppose." He shrugged. "Plus, you have to admit, I bet your guy is anxious to get back, as well."

"True."

He looked for the other man, but he figured Law was off sulking because another talk about strategy and catch-up with Zoro had turned into a laugh fest. All Luffy wanted to do was get there, beat some guy up, and let that be the end of it. He didn't want to hear about World Government things or who was dying or what the plan was to capture a few other pirate captains for a foothold in power over others in the New World. It sounded like a huge adventure meant for a big screen, but Sanji was more worried about his phone dying than anything else.

After everyone was served their evening drinks, and Zoro started chatting about what he'd learned from the other samurais, Sanji put the tray out of everyone's path and took the effort needed to hide behind Nami's tangerine garden. Once there, he sat at the edge of the roof so his feet could dangle towards the floor below, let his shoulders slump, and pulled his phone from his pocket. He was startled to see it at 20%, and he looked up at the sky with a heavy expression.

 _Was_ he some sort of sea demon? Would that explain the weird stains on his shirt, the footprints he left behind in the dark? The weirdness with the sea? What if he was some sort of manifestation of something he couldn't understand…what if, when he lost power to his phone, his one connection to a world that he knew would be the breaking of some tether point for him?

What was his goal here?

 _Why_?

It had to do with the bar scene – it had to do with the black out periods. But what if once he found out what happened, he ceased to exist, anyway? What if he learned something terrible?

At the scrape of sound down below, he looked over and saw Law standing there in the darkness, looking out over the darkness of the sea. He had such a lost expression to his face that Sanji wanted to call out and ask what was wrong. But he decided on getting up and moving away to give the man space to think. He ended up turning too wide, and ended up slipping off the edge of the roof and falling down to the deck with a garbled noise.

"Call off the ambulance, I'm okay!" he said moments later, when he was able to get his breath back.

"Why are you spying on me?"

"I was here, first. _You_ interrupted my melancholic musings. If you want to brood, brood on the other side of the ship."

When nothing emerged from the other man, Sanji brushed himself off, then made to walk away.

"What size are your feet, Mr Blackleg?"

"Elevens."

"Then why do you leave a size bigger than that behind you?"

Sanji looked back, and, in the moonlight, he could see the footprints behind him. Carefully, he aligned one foot with one of them, and was startled to see that he was right. He was bewildered.

" _Weird_. I don't know why I'm leaving footprints behind."

"Is this why you prefer to go shoeless?"

"To be honest, the shoes here hurt my feet. And since I can't feel with my feet, I see no problem walking barefoot."

Law turned to look him, frowning heavily. "How did you lose sensation to your legs, Mr Blackleg?"

"I tripped," Sanji said.

"No, you didn't."

furrowing his brow, Sanji couldn't think of anything to say at that moment, hearing the echo of some long ago memory being spoken right in front of him.

"A spinal cord injury is often caused by blunt force trauma in cases here. I'm assuming, in your world, that you experienced something similar."

"To be honest…I can't remember."

"You can't remember hurting your back severely enough to lose sensation to your legs?" Law repeated. "I'd definitely remember something like that."

"The thing is…I don't know if I had it before or…or after. But I do know it was an older matter."

"Then…maybe it happened to someone closer to you, perhaps?"

"I don't understand. How could something such as a spinal injury close to someone to me, affect my own legs?"

"Admittedly, I've been bothered recently, after you…saved me from drowning," Law said slowly, looking away. "There was something I saw down there that hasn't left me, quite yet."

"My super amazing swimming skills?"

"I was unsure of how to approach the topic. But after some observation, I'm afraid I've come to no other conclusions, other than Mr Roronoa being right about you. Unless Miss Robin can come up with something different, and Mr Tony can explain those mysterious apples you've mentioned."

"What'd you see?" Sanji asked curiously.

For a few moments, Law didn't say anything. He looked distinctly uncomfortable. Somewhere in the distance, a strange animal called out, and was answered by something as equally as eerie miles to their left. The clouds in the night sky drifted slowly over the bright moon, casting odd shadows on the deck. It wasn't cold – it wasn't warm. It was the perfect temperature to sit on deck without a blanket, without a sweater.

"I saw myself," Law answered slowly. "But…my reflection was…different. It was me, yet it wasn't."

Sanji stared at him in silence for several moments, unsure of what to say. He couldn't even formulate a reply. But it definitely explained Law's expression after that day.

"Sometimes, I feel that…the sea itself beckons me. I've…accomplished what I needed to, what happens after that? For thirteen years, I'd only survived just to gain revenge for someone…dear, to me. Now that I have it…what do I do? I'd never given a thought to an 'after', Mr Blackleg. I was prepared to die, back there, so perhaps that's why I never thought about it much. But I never thought that this _after_ would be so…unfulfilling."

"Why would an accomplishment be 'unfulfilling'? You completed a goal, you should be celebrating."

"Indeed, I should. I should be considerably joyful, but…I wonder if it's because long standing habits are hard to break when they are now all I've known."

Sanji was quiet for some time while he processed this. He knew nothing about this man. He knew nothing about what he was talking about, and he couldn't fathom the feelings he was expressing because of what he'd endured. But he was familiar with this type of monster. It was the same type that had his Law locking himself in his room for a day or two, that made him say or do ugly things he normally would've never done if he were 'okay'; the type that made him take unnecessary risks, to "whatever" the risk of losing a job, or even making it difficult to interact with people.

The kind that ate someone up from the inside, and made it difficult for them to reach out because their voice was stolen, and because it hurt to talk. It was only his actions that helped his Law out of it, sometimes, but there wasn't much he could do about it with this one.

"in the end, I think, it's okay to feel this way. Because you feel you have nothing left to do, right? Even after we all accomplish a task, there's always a 'What do I do next?' that comes after it. It doesn't always happen right away. But I think that if you let yourself go after all the fighting you did to get there…it would seem like a terrible waste. You said it yourself to me just the other day."

"But I don't care about that, right now."

"Because your loved one isn't here? Whoever it was wanted you to be happy. Maybe it's time to look at a different goal."

"I have one. It's to overthrow – "

" _No_. I don't want to hear about this fight and that fight, and this battle that will end all battles," Sanji interrupted, causing Law to frown at him. "In the end, that's an entire world problem. You aren't the entire world, ba-yyyy leaf."

" ' _Bay leaf'_?"

" _Never mind_! What matters now is what you want as an _individual_. I don't want to hear about beating this guy up, or that guy going to prison – whatever. I want to know what you want for yourself. Is it unlimited sex with gorgeous women? All the riceballs you can eat? Gaining twenty pounds?"

"NO."

"Okay, how about….for instance, I will give a good example. I want to go home so I can make peace with my live-in. Now…you….?"

For a few moments, Law looked up at the sky. Then he scrunched his brow. Then he frowned, stroking his chin. Then he tilted his head one way, then the other.

"I suppose all I want is peace. But how could that be possible after looking back at all the dead bodies that have piled up behind me in my quest for the treasure?"

"This world is nuts, then," Sanji decided, hands on his hips as he looked out over the sea. "I would have to live here to understand it."

"This is the life one lives when they grew up in it! To have something as frivolous was wanting to go home to a 'live-in' to make peace with them – that's beyond my imagination."

"So is yours."

"Then it's a stretch for either of us to understand one another."

"Not entirely. You have a lot of similarities to someone dear to me. in a way, I feel good in that I can be here to help in some way, because I live with those similarities, too. Their battle, my battle, overall."

"But if you aren't in the midst of it, then how could you even begin to understand the emptiness as a result of it?"

"I do. It's called 'alcoholism'."

"Then why bother giving advice if you don't even know how to fight your own battle?"

"Then why discuss 'strategy' with someone that doesn't understand _your_ concept of it, but knows how to get to the end result because he agrees with what you're trying to accomplish?"

Law fell silent, then. He crossed his arms tightly, scrunched his shoulders, and curled his lips with irritation.

Sanji wanted to laugh because even if they were from different worlds, they shared the same pout. Without thinking, he reached out and hugged him, holding onto him tightly. Law immediately tensed up and gave him that shocked/furious look that he often gave Luffy when Luffy grabbed him unexpectedly.

"Take it from your mysterious reflection, Law. There is _always_ a second chance. This is it. Don't let it go to waste."

Sanji then whipped away before Law could move. He walked up to the back railing and looked over at the water below, admiring the way the moon lit up the white caps, caused the stars to disappear within violent ripples of strength. He looked out over the sea with a melancholic expression, wondering why it was easier telling someone this when he should abide to it himself. But was _this_ his second chance?

'Can't stand looking at you, sometimes.'

'I c that,' came the surprisingly fast reply.

'You can be someone else's problem. Kill yourself.'

'What a shitty thing to say.'

'Maybe Hell will appreciate your failures, you sorry ass human being.'

When he heard Luffy shout his name, he pushed away from the railing with a heavy sigh. "There's not enough Dimetap in the world for that kid…"

"If you are some sort of demon, trapped between worlds…what would it take for you to move on?" Law asked, facing away from him. "Was it something that you did, or something that…that _he_ did?"

"I'm pretty sure it was something I did," Sanji answered, fiddling with his pants, enjoying the looseness in the waistband. Having most of his food stolen, plus all this physical activity, lack of alcohol had really changed his shape. "Otherwise, why serve someone else's penance?"

Law was silent for some time, so when Luffy screamed for Sanji once more, Sanji turned to walk away, hollering a cranky reply back.

"ARE YOU PLAYING HIDE AND SEEK, SANJI?"

"WE'LL COME FIND YOU!"

"YO HO HO HO HO! SANJI!"

"Because maybe you aren't here to fix yours. Maybe you're here as someone else's penance."

"I'm not dead," Sanji reminded him. "And it doesn't make sense to be someone else's penance when _I'm_ the one with the problem. And if you are no where associated with the Law of my world, why would I leave that world just to come…fix something of yours? Shouldn't my supposedly dead self remain over there? This is an other worldly matter caused by mysterious apples."

Law looked at him. "What if you were on the way to reach the stars and was pulled back to the sea?"

"You are obsessed with that theory. To me, it doesn't make sense. I'm _not_ dead."

"SANJI ISNT IN THE OBSERVATION ROOM!"

"HE'S NOT ON THE MAST!"

"HE'S NOT UP NAMI'S SKIRT!"

" _BROOK_!"

"Ghosts are real, Mr Blackleg. They haunt others in their dreams, or in their thoughts. They can manifest as living beings."

"I'm NOT dead!"

"Maybe you didn't come here to serve a penance for yourself. Maybe you came here as a personal message to me. maybe it's not something that you have to do for yourself in order to return home. Maybe it's reminding me of what I should be doing."

"It doesn't make sense, though. You've no connection with my world, so why would I reach out for you?"

"Then why in the sea am I looking at myself?"

"I don't know. But it doesn't mean you belong down there, either, if that's what you're trying to convince yourself. What was your relationship with this world's me like?"

"I could depend on him."

"On a _personal_ level?" Sanji asked, pinky up with a leer on his face.

"NO," Law said impatiently, reaching out and pushing that pinky away. "Utterly ridiculous."

"HE'S NOT UP HERE!"

"HE'S NOT IN THE KITCHEN!"

"HE'S NOT ON THE SLIDE!"

Sanji laughed, reaching out to touch his hands as he said in singsong, "You want to hug me, you want to love me, you think I'm gorgeous - ! _Ow_."

Law threw his hands away from him, but in the darkness, underneath that brim of that hat, Sanji couldn't see his expression. "Utterly ridiculous."

"You repeated yourself, you're definitely all shook up at the – no, wait, come back!" Sanji laughed as Law turned and walked away. "Come back, I was just kidding! Okay, _okay_ , you two were just great man friends that didn't ever think _once_ of molesting each other. I'm the only one that thinks that way! I can't help it!"

"I hope you find your way home, soon, Mr Blackleg. This type of idiocy isn't needed, here."

"Annnnd you closed up shop for the night. We were just getting nice and tight."

"THERE YOU ARE! LAW! Were you helping him?" Luffy asked, jumping onto Sanji's back, causing him to stumble under his weight. "You knew we were looking for him!"

"Mr Strawhat, I refuse to be involved in your games."

"It's okay to play with us, you know. We won't look at you any differently."

"it's not that I feel self conscious about the way you people look at me. it's just that I'm much too grown for such games."

"You were given this second chance, y'know," Sanji reminded him, grabbing a hold of Luffy's hands as Luffy looked down at him curiously. "Don't let it go to waste."

Then he walked off as Brook and Chopper turned the corner, looking disappointed that Luffy had found him first.

"Aw! I wanted to find Sanji first!"

"Sanji! I'll take a peek of your underwear in lieu of payment for the efforts I used looking for you!"

"Shut up! All of you!"

"Slaves don't talk to their masters that way, Sanji."

"I knew it!"

"We're hungry, Sanji!"

After the noises faded, Law returned to looking over the sea. The conversation that had just taken place repeated itself over and over in his thoughts. He did have to second guess the sea demon theory. He looked at his hand. The moonlight caught and illuminated all the discolorations of his skin, rendering it bright against the shadowy shape of his hand. His skin tingled, remembering the warmth in Sanji's hands on his.


	11. Chapter 11

**Guest#1: They have nice talks, don't they? It's nice to find somebody to talk and talk and talk to, where even the comfortable silences are just right. He's getting closer to finding out why he's there in the pirate world – the flashbacks are coming back more and more, and they're putting themselves back together, and he's going to see, soon, why he's meant to be here. Lol break over! Thanks for your comments :D**

 **SiberianRS: Only Luffy sees the truth, huh?**

 **Naghi-Tan: He's definitely dead inside**

 **Panda: You can use it anywhere! On your boss, your parents, your siblings, your friends, your pets…I use it all the time. It comes in handy when establishing your dominance. Ah! Thanks for the compliment! Totally flattered right now, rolling on the kitchen floor with glee :D Yes…yes, there is total ZoLaw/LawZo hints that hurt throughout this story. Just bear with it.**

 **Alasse-M: Hopefully he remembers how they met, soon! It'd help things if he could.**

 **Lily: you are an amazing seer, haha. I love what you wrote. It made me all tingly as I finished this, this morning.**

 **Chapter Eleven –**

That night, Sanji stared up at the stars. He'd made his bed on the lawn, and it was slightly chilly, so he had a blanket over himself, tattered pillow behind his head. He thought about the conversation he had with Law. There was something in his heart that made him feel hopeful that the things he said had somewhat of an impact on the other man. He felt helpless, really, because while he was familiar with the whole aspect of this mental instability, it was different when the person was someone he wasn't familiar with.

He would be everything he could to remind the man that he was loved and wanted. But sometimes that wasn't what Law would want from him. There were some days when he just needed a text over the phone while he hid in bed, unable to get the strength needed to get up. Somedays, he needed to strike out, and Sanji was his punching bag. There were others where he became frighteningly clingy, convinced that Sanji was going to leave him. Out of all of those modes, the last always made Sanji feel uneasy.

Their relationship had been a tumultuous one since the first day. Both of them came from angry, violent families, and Sanji was pretty sure it was a bar fight that brought them together. Or maybe it was an encounter on the street. He was pretty frustrated that he couldn't remember that far back.

But it wasn't always like that. Both of them were each other's lifesavers because both of them felt as if they were a 'waste of space' because of their individual problems. They knew what it was like to be a nuisance for others, so they clung to each other. It truly felt that they were the only ones that could understand them.

Sanji wasn't stupid – he knew what the dysfunction looked like to their friends, to others. But it only made them closer, because it was just them.

' _Just us_.'

"Just us, Pooh Bear," he said to the stars, reaching for them, his shadowy hand covering bits and pieces of the sky. "Oh, what a pair, me and you."

He then shuffled about, looking for his phone. Seeing the 45% battery charge made him lower it to his chest, absolutely puzzled. He looked at the phone again, absently wiping at some smears on the screen. The no service notification was still there, but he still tried to make a phone call.

Only this time, he heard ringing on the other end.

He sat up hastily, heart pounding as he waited for someone to answer.

When he heard the pick up, his throat went dry. He couldn't think of what to say first. So then he listened to the static on the other end, trying to put his relief into functioning order.

'Answer your phone,' came a distorted voice. He assumed it was because of the crazy connection that he had that made the voice sound disembodied, broken in such a way that he couldn't even tell if it were a man _or_ woman speaking. But he looked at his phone with bewildered action, sure he'd touched the right number. He did see the ID picture and display, but the voice was so… _alien_.

"I'm serious, answer your phone."

"I'm here. _Hello_? Hey, hello? Can you hear me?" he asked, rising to a hasty stand. He moved from one foot to the other, hearing the static change with his action.

"I'm sorry, please answer your phone."

"I can hear you! I can hear you, can you hear me?"

"please answer…"

"I can hear you! Talk to me, listen, I'm on this boat – I'm on this boat in the middle of no where, I - !"

"Let me be a better person to you. We can do this together."

Sanji paused in place. Was that Law's voice on the other end? It almost didn't sound like it. The static, the connection, it was too odd. It was neither man or woman. More like white noise coming from changing radio stations, where random voices would emerge suddenly, with no same voice speaking. He stood in the middle of the lawn area with his head drooped, knowing that he couldn't reach out.

"Why aren't you answering? Pick up."

He wished he could hear his Law's voice. It felt like he hadn't heard it in ages. This voice wasn't his, though.

"I love you, I need you in my life. I'm so sorry."

But Sanji _felt_ that this was Law's message to him. He felt it in his bones, in his heart, his soul. He felt that Law was trying to communicate to him, but …these voices weren't his.

"PICK UP!"

The connection fell away, and there was nothing but a ringing silence on the other end.

Sanji swiped the screen and looked out over the sea once more. He knew in his heart that he'd never be able to call home, again.

He turned the phone off, powering it down. Wrapped it carefully in plastic before he slipped it into his pocket. Then laid back down, pulling the blanket over his chest so he could continue staring up at the stars above him. They blinked in random action, so that it seemed that each one was trying to talk to him. The violets and blues of the worlds beyond this one continued to shift by, and before he knew it, the sky had changed.

He closed his eyes to get at least a few minutes in, unable to lose the content of what he heard out of his head.

Was it a message from the stars?

Or was it coming from the sea?

: :

Sanji was surprised when Law gave him his hands. They were rigid, stiff, and the other man was obviously uncomfortable doing it. He had hands that were beautifully strong, callused and rough, and his nails were perfectly groomed ovals that were untouched by teeth or nervous habit. While they looked as if they'd been dipped in paint, the skin discoloration made whiter in the sun, all Sanji could feel was the warmth and strength in them. He was really tempted to turn them against his face, the way an animal would stretch for petting.

Not one to resist his impulses, he clapped them palm down over his cheeks and eyes while Law gave him a surprised look, automatically tensing to retract them.

"Just as I thought," Sanji said, rubbing his cheek against one rough palm before Law yanked them away. "They're perfect."

"Mr Blackleg, that's the last time I give you anything in regards to your question about a potential food allergy," Law snapped at him, growing embarrassed.

"I couldn't believe you fell for it," Sanji snickered. "That's a cook's oldest pick up line."

"This is touching without permission, and – "

"What's so wrong with it?"

"Don't touch me. Don't – "

" _Why_?" Sanji asked, resting his head atop of the table with his hands folded in front of him. "Just answer me that, and I'll leave you alone. For the rest of the day. You can even have my favorite brooding spot, if you'd like."

"Because – there's no need for that. For…I'd rather not touch anybody, especially a Strawhat, considering what games you all play so childishly," Law snapped, picking up his fork and knife to starting cutting into his food once more, the sounds of Luffy, Chopper and Ussop catching Sanji's attention as they ran past the open door.

Sanji disregarded his earlier promise. "Do you not like physical affection? I'm sure by now you realize that's how we like to express ourselves around here. From what was said, you should be used to it, by now."

"Quite honestly, I will not be 'used' to it," Law muttered, mouth full, expression irritated.

Sanji watched him eat for a few moments. He couldn't help but feel affectionate towards the other man. He missed his Law so badly that it was an ache in his chest. Being around this one was killing him, but at the same time, he was so grateful to be in his presence.

"Stop looking at me," Law then snapped, not looking at him.

"I just think you're so beautiful," Sanji said sincerely.

Law set his utensils down, and cleaned up his mess. His expression was upset, and his shoulders were rigid, and Sanji reached out and grabbed his hands as they moved to pick up the plate.

"There's nothing wrong with compliments, and I don't give them out so freely, especially to other men. I'm speaking from my heart. Like I said the other day, I don't think you hear them enough. I think that's why you run away or get angry when I give you one – you don't know what they are, so you don't know how to accept them."

"Looking the way I do? Like I haven't heard it all? Let go, Mr Blackleg, or I will remove your hands from your arms."

"Then don't listen to _them_. Listen to me. You're amazing. You're a strong warrior, from what I hear, and you're pretty good at surviving perilous things. I'm sure you hear that a lot. But regarding your physical appearance – you're beautiful. When I look at you, all I want to do is touch you. I wish you'd let us touch you a lot more often. Luffy hugs you a lot, Chopper loves sitting next to you – you guys have some decent conversations, I can't help but overhear – and Zoro slaps you like a bro, when you're doing bro-things. Isn't that positive affection something you'd want more of?"

Law gave him a flat look. " _No_."

"So, since I am none of those things and none of their personalities, from now on, you'll hear more from me. From now until I leave, you'll hear nothing but good things from me," Sanji said with a wide grin. "They might be a little flirty, though, I'll admit."

Law jerked his hands away from him, rising from the table with his plate and utensils. He set it all on the counter and strode out from the kitchen with a furious expression. Sanji stood up from his chair, crossed over to his side, and picked up the sword that had been left behind. It was odd how it shook and seemed to hiss a little, but he figured it was only because this world was weird and he'd never understand it. Then he stood at the door for a few moments with it cradled in his arms. When the man came back, he was visibly flustered. He snatched his sword out from Sanji's arms and stomped off.

Then Sanji turned and made his way back to the sink, mumbling, "It's not cheating if it's with an other world Law, is it?"

That entire day, he made it a purpose to hunt the other man down and deliver a compliment. Once he realized the other man started making an effort to hide from him, Sanji made the extra effort to go look for him. It was a ship in the middle of a sea – there weren't too many places for him to hide.

It was after he'd set his tray down and went looking for him – finding him in Ussop's workshop, much to Ussop's horror – that Nami lowered her glasses and looked at him sternly.

"Are you bullying our guest?" she asked cautiously.

"Yes. He'll think twice about crossing a line with me, next time."

She resettled in her lawn chair, adjusting her top. It was odd, but Sanji was paying an unusual amount of attention to that man. "Isn't that cheating?"

"I've had all day to think about it, and I've come to the conclusion that it's not."

"Is he the one who you're engaged, too?"

"Would you like some tea with biscuits?"

"Extra sugar and lemon, please. And I won't tell anyone," she assured him as he walked off, grumbling. But she made a face, tilting her head to think about the odd pairing. While this Sanji was a weird concept, it was weirder still to imagine him in a relationship with another man. With another man like Law, to boot. But she sat there, thinking about it, and watched as the man in question peeked out cautiously from the door nearby, left it, and walked hastily into the men's quarters, obviously not wanting to be seen.

When Sanji returned with her request, he set the tray down and disappeared into the men's quarters. Came back hastily, grabbed the tray and ran to the kitchen. Not even a moment later, Law slammed the door open with a furious expression and Nami pointed in the direction of the kitchen. She didn't even ask what was happening, but when he ran in that direction, she instantly grew curious. Brook was sitting on the railing with Luffy, Ussop and Chopper on the soldier's dock, facing away from them, but once he caught sight of Nami, he cheered and waved like they hadn't seen each other in the last ten minutes.

She gave him an impatient wave back, looking back towards the kitchen to see what was happening. She watched a ladle fly out towards the water, and was replaced moments later by Sanji.

"MAN OVERBOARD!" Brook hollered, everyone's attention in that area.

"What is happening?" Nami asked herself impatiently, watching as Law stalked out from the kitchen with a red face, and he climbed up to the observation room while Franky and Robin made their way to the railing, and Robin's arms crossed.

Seconds later, Sanji climbed over the railing on that side, looking embarrassed.

"Sanji!" Nami called out impatiently, the man walking towards her with an impatient flapping of his soaked clothes. "What are you doing?"

"Laundry," he answered.

"No. _This."_

"Testing my boundaries," he answered, walking towards the men's quarters.

"What does that mean?" she asked on a bewildered tone. "I told you to stop bullying him. He's sensitive."

Sanji snickered. "He sure is."

Since it didn't answer her question and only piqued her interest, she sat back in her chair and let him go with a wave of her hand. Sure enough, Sanji kept pestering the man for the rest of the day. He sent Luffy up to the observation room with a boxed snack and a note, and she only knew there was a note because she caught sight of Law tossing shredded paper overboard with an embarrassed look to his face. Sanji cornered him at dinner with a plate specially made for him, and when he looked at it, he practically scattered food with a fork and a shocked expression that only turned into outraged anger, refusing to eat it.

When Sanji sent Chopper with another plate to him, Chopper said something to him that made his face and neck flame, and Chopper came to Nami, asking why 'a spoonful of sugar' made things easier to swallow.

"Which is a really good idea, in hindsight!"

"SANJI!" Nami shrieked. "What is wrong with you?"

"Hmm? Seconds?" Sanji asked from the kitchen, looking out. Luffy heard the magic words and raced towards him, causing him to slam the door shut on the rubbery teen.

Nami watched Sanji approach Law later that night. He licked his finger, then his shirt, causing Law to give him a shocked look, intending on reprimanding him, to which Sanji said firmly, "Let's get you out of these wet clothes."

" _SANJI_!"

"How is that a compliment?" Law asked him, a little puzzled. Nami looked at him incredulously, unsure whether or not to be concerned.

"I lost track of the moment, actually. Let me back up. Did you just sit in a pile of sugar?"

"No. No…the chair was clean when I sat do –"

"Because you have a sweet ass."

"MR BLACKLEG, WHAT - I will _kill_ you. I will take you apart and dump you into the sea, don't – don't _look_! Why would you even - ? For you to say that - ! _DIE_!"

"SANJI!" Nami yelled, striding over as Law stomped off with a red head this time, looking similar to one of the tomatoes that Sanji had been cutting up earlier.

"It was a _compliment_!" Sanji complained, but couldn't finish what he was saying as she grabbed his ear and yanked him back towards the kitchen, much to Ussop's delight as he looked up from one of his projects to watch.

"Either you're looking for an easy way out, or you're just mentally damaged from all the brain cells you lack from drinking, but doing this to Law isn't something you should be doing," Nami reprimanded him. "I understand you're trying to get home, but how is harassing our guest a part of it? And, to be honest, it's creepy."

"Why?" Sanji asked her curiously. "I know I'm being a creep, but…I just want him to know that – well, it's between us, really. I worked it out with him this morning. I think he deserves a lot of positive attention, you know."

"I understand. I see what you're getting at, but…doing this isn't the smartest thing you could be doing. What happens when you leave? Our Sanji isn't like you. He hates men. He respects Law, he'll lay his life down for Luffy, and he'll give a one handed clap for Zoro's greatest achievements, but this isn't him. Your behavior isn't him. So when you leave, what do you think you'll leave behind?"

"Quite possibly a bad impression," Sanji admitted with a shrug. "I just want him to lighten up, a little. He's so intense. I'm doing what it takes to make him feel comfortable in his own skin."

"We just leave him alone, and let him figure it out by himself," Nami said, hands on her hips. "It's up to him to make that decision, not ours. Luffy is our most tactile weapon when it comes to having someone open up to him, but if Law really hasn't, that's just his personality. He's been through so much, that's just how he is. For you to bully him in this manner – build him up just to break him down when you leave – how do you think that's going to affect him?"

Sanji saw her point. He looked away with a guilty expression. "You're right. I'll stop. I just…I miss mine, is all."

"So it _is_ him."

"They're very similar. I just…but you make so much sense. I'll stop. Sorry for bothering you."

"You had good intentions, you just didn't think it through," she said, reaching out and patting his shoulder. "You can't retrain feral animals. You just need to let them be."

"But he's not feral," Sanji muttered as she left.

Later that night, the wind was growing harsh, and the sea rocked them violently. He stayed in the kitchen near a bucket, trying not to be sick. Nami had mentioned that this storm had the potential to grow into a bigger one that could possibly leave behind major damage. She was trying to push them out of the main eye of it, so the others were at the helm and Sanji was hiding in the kitchen because he couldn't handle the severe rumbling overhead, the high winds, and the rocking action that made his stomach climb to his throat.

Lightning flashed, and it felt like something massive hit the ship from the side. He was almost tossed off his feet as it lifted and fell at such an angle that his bucket flew out of his grasp and he grabbed hold of the counter to avoid slamming to the floor. The door opened to admit torrents of rain and wind, then slammed shut again.

"Holy shit," he muttered, clinging to the counter. The ship rocked again, thunder booming right overhead. It felt like someone was making those sounds deliberately – clapping their hands together, or something. Banging on a massive pot in the sky. He looked over to retrieve his bucket, then caught sight of the windows as lightening flashed.

His heart stopped once he realized someone was walking by the windows. Common sense left him as he stumbled away from the counter's edge. Rain hit the glass panes with such force that it seemed as if they'd crack under the pressure. Wood snapped and popped. He thought he heard yells and screams, but the thunder drowned it out.

He managed to get the door open to look in the direction the figure had taken. Rain hit him hard, like mini-pricks of a knife.

'I'm taking us both to a place where we can't hurt anybody else.'

The wind was his only opponent. It was so dark, his vision obscured by the rain, that when it blew, it was impossible to see anything. Wood snapped somewhere, a loud cracking noise causing a jolt of panic to build in him. But thunder boomed right after, and it hurt his ears. When he managed to lift his head, he saw the back of the person walking ahead of him. He went in that direction, hands lowering to his sides as the ship tilted and twisted, and his feet couldn't grip the wood underneath quite right. The sea seemed level with the railing. Water gushed over the floor, and nearly knocked him off balance. But he used the wall for assistance, digging his way towards the back of the ship.

When lightning flashed, he saw that they were surrounded by massive waves. Each one was taller than the sails of the ship. The lightening illuminated the water's foam, seaweed that looked like tentacles. One wave had the impression of a smaller ship trapped within its grasp. A fierce whistling sound overcame all these noises, and he didn't know what it was, but it made the hairs on the back of his wet neck rise.

Once he made it to the back, the darkness had returned again. Thunder boomed, and he could feel the ship turning. Unsteadily, he braced himself against the movement, hearing the low groan and whine of an engine working hard. The floor underneath him seemed to bubble and pop. torrents of water made it difficult to stand in one place.

Lightning flashed, and he realized he was looking at his Law leaning against the back railing. He had a calm, peaceful expression to his face, as if he wasn't standing in the middle of a raging storm. He was wearing the same outfit he wore their night out at the back – a black v-neck with jeans, and his favorite 'ugly' nurse's shoes, the ones with the buckles that Sanji hated seeing. Seeing him made joy explode from within Sanji, and he started towards him with a short cry of relief.

"I'd rather be up there than down here. This miserable Hell," he said to Sanji, and Sanji didn't understand how he could hear that calm voice telling him such a quiet thing when he couldn't even hear his own thoughts.

"I need to go home! I need to go home!" Sanji shouted at him, reaching out with one hand so that Law would take it. "Take me home with you!"

"Maybe Hell will appreciate your failures, you sorry ass human being."

Sanji gaped at him, unable to fathom why he'd say that to him.

"Everyone hates you, you control freak. They won't miss you if you're gone."

Then, right before his eyes, Law held up his phone. Sanji touched his pockets frantically before he watched the man toss the device overboard. He didn't even think. He raced after it, arms stretched out with desperation.

"Maybe someone else in a different universe wants you, because I don't," he heard Law say as he leapt over the railing. "I just think it's funny that you'd go to him instead of me. I'm right here in front of you, and you can't even get it up."

He hit the water, and it felt like he'd dove headfirst into concrete. The water swallowed up the sounds of the storm. But when lightening flashed overhead, it illuminated the familiarity of the darkness that he had grown comfortable with. The stars disappeared, giving him enough light to see a strange emptiness in the depths he'd found comfort in.

"Hang yourself because I don't care," he heard Law say against his ear, and his calm, low voice continued to talk to him as he swam after the rapidly sinking phone, just inches from his outstretched fingers. "You can be someone else's problem. Kill yourself."

"Can't stand looking at you, sometimes."

"You can have him, Zoro! You want him so much! But I want him back in the morning when you're done."

Sanji kept swimming, wondering why he'd repeat those terrible things. Those terrible ugly things that didn't seem to go away, that sounded odd coming from his mouth. It didn't fit. Those words didn't fit him.

He reached out, lightning illuminating the world above them. The Sunny was steadily moving away, waves building towards the clouds like walls. Lightening zigzagged through the heavens above, confusing him over which direction was which. The sky was reflected in the sea's surface. Once his fingers curled around the phone, he shifted direction, kicking out to start swimming back the way he'd come.

But the Sunny seemed to drift further and further away, and it felt like he wasn't getting to the surface any easier. As he cut through the water with desperate swings of his arm, Law continued to speak to him.

"It just needs to be us, again. _Just us_."

"I can't let anybody in-between us, anymore."

"It just needs to be us, again. _Just us_. No one else. No family, no friends to judge us."

It seemed hopeless to try and reach the Sunny in time.

" _Move on. I'll come find you_."

But then the anchor began to drop, the current dragging it backward – the hooks sliced through the water, and Sanji reached out for the chain, narrowly avoiding the heavier piece of metal that nearly knocked him off his path. Once he touched the chain, curling his other arm forward to grab a hold of it, he realized he wasn't holding onto his phone. He was holding tightly onto someone's hand. Once he realized who it was, he was horrified to look. They had been underwater for much too long. When he felt the jerk of the chain, he held onto it as tightly as he could, understanding that they were pulling it in – they'd dropped it for him. How they managed to see him in this violence was beyond him, but he wasn't about to fail them, now.

Once they broke the surface, the wind slashing at his face and waves threatening to pull them both from each other, Sanji's mind was whirling with confusion. His arm was weak, and he felt like he'd lose his grip – he didn't feel strong enough to hold their heads above the raging surface, or hold onto Law tightly enough.

But it was Zoro's strong grip that caught his shoulder, then adjusted to grab his arm, yanking both of them out of the water as if they were nothing. Sanji would marvel at it later, as Franky helped grab Law, the pair of them helping pull them both over the railing and back onto the deck.

They had a hard time getting Sanji's fingers to uncurl from Law's wrist, for the man was unable to let him go.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Do not youtube the song described in this fic while reading this chapter. It'll damage your insides.**

 **Guest#1: oh yes, dysfunctional, indeed, but definitely with feeling. Too much feeling, to be exact. When I read your review, I heard exactly what you did. It's a terrible curse she put on everyone, but I still love her. And I will lipsync the shit out of that jam. Glad you liked the light scene! Because this one is terribly overstuffed with agony. As for your theories…we're getting closer to what happened.**

 **Lily: ZoSan is actually my OTP and I'm convinced it's canon and nobody can say otherwise. LawSan is my FTP. Your wish is my command :D**

 **Nattsubihanabi: There are a lot of 'whats?' for this story, but it'll all make sense very soon. *very soon.**

 **Naghi-tan: We'll find out very soon. D:**

 **siberianRS: I liked the wet shirt one. I amused me while writing it (I heard it somewhere, I might've been drun – I mean, overheard it somewhere).**

 **Panda Blackwhite: I didn't mean to. All will be revealed very soon!**

 **Chapter Twelve –**

The next morning, Sanji didn't move. Whether it was from the violent storm last night, or his own emotion, but his body was too sore, numb and stiff. He felt like there was a weight in his lungs he couldn't quite move, and a hand around his heart that squeezed. His thoughts were numb. His tongue felt like cardboard. His hands felt useless. The aquarium bar's soft glow illuminated the dark room, and fish swam lazily, unbothered by the occasional rocking of the ship, or the running of feet nearby.

All of the words Law had said to him haunted him. The grotesque phrases echoed over and over through the stunned molasses of his thoughts. He absolutely could not believe that he would tell him such horrid things, and he was caught in a quandary because he didn't remember how he got here. And what he did remember was scattered. So Law could have told him these things before he left, and Sanji just could not accept it.

They said hurtful things to each other all the time, but nothing like this. He couldn't imagine saying these things to Law – and Law might say criticizing things, but nothing like this.

Had something happened where such words were used intentionally?

He heard the door open behind him, and he closed his eyes so he could fake sleep. He didn't want anybody bothering him, right now, when he felt such turmoil inside of him. He didn't want to be pressured, he didn't want to be useful, he didn't want anybody's shit, today. He just needed to be by himself and sort things out, and he needed to do it alone.

"Sanji. Hey, Sanji. Are you still sad?"

"I'm asleep. Go away."

"You're not asleep if you're talking to me," Luffy pointed out, still in a whisper. Sanji could feel him crawling onto the couch, looking over him. The smell of sunshine, sea and the faint hit of body odor hit Sanji with a strong movement. It wasn't unpleasant – it made him feel like he was outside, himself, enjoying the breeze and weather. "Chopper wants to know if you're hurt, and if you feel any sort of pain, you need to let me know, to let _him_ know, so he can come see you. He says he respects your need for privacy, but he's not going to tolerate it any longer if you don't tell _me_ , to tell _him_ , that you're okay. _So_. Are _you_ okay?"

"I'm fine," Sanji mumbled.

"Look me in the eye, then," Luffy demanded, trying to align his eye with his.

"No. I'm tired."

"You're still sad," Luffy decided, resting his cheek against his shoulder, Sanji grumbling at the feel of his surprisingly heavy weight on his upper half. The kid was slender, but he was carved out of muscle. "I don't know why you're so sad, Sanji. Law is fine. You got to him in time. Chopper thinks he still has water in his lungs, but Law chopped it out, so when Chopper fainted, Law helped him, too. So you don't need to be sad about that."

Sanji took a few moments to wonder what that even meant. Then he decided he didn't care enough to want to know. He closed his eyes again, trying to ignore the feel of Luffy's breath against his ear and sideburns. Then he felt the kid's fingertip on his cheekbone, and he was touching him, and Sanji jiggled his shoulder to make him stop.

"It's okay to be sad sometimes, Sanji," Luffy said, patting his head. "But you shouldn't let it make your decisions. Sometimes, we can't help but be sad. What are you sad about?"

"I'm. _Not_. Sad."

"When I first saw you, I knew you were," Luffy said firmly. "I thought it was because you weren't in the right place, like you said, but then every time I manage to catch sight of you when you were hiding by Nami's garden, I could see it. I don't know what you're thinking about, or what made you come here, but there's definitely a solution for it that only friends can help you, with."

For a few moments, Sanji just let him talk. Hearing that, he said in response, "Show me how to get to the stars."

"You want to go to Skypiea?" Luffy asked curiously. "Why? Do you and Enel have unfinished business?"

All of that went over Sanji's head. "No. I think someone is waiting for me. But I don't know how to…get to them."

"Ah, I see!" Luffy said, sounding relieved. "Then we'll find a way! We always find a way! Who is it?"

"First off, I think what matters here is that I need to know _how_ I got here," Sanji said, shifting around. He pulled the phone from his pocket. The plastic around it had saved it from their time underwater. He unwrapped it, and powered it on, biting anxiously at his thumb nail while Luffy stared at the device with an enraptured expression. When he saw the 85% battery charge, he was stunned. But what shocked him even further was the notification of incoming messages. He sat up quickly, knocking Luffy over as the repeated chime chirped until he had new messages.

He was almost afraid to look at them, feeling Luffy straighten up, sitting up directly behind him – did any of these people know personal boundaries? – looking over his shoulder.

'Are you ready?'

'Can't stand looking at you, sometimes.'

'You can be someone else's problem. Kill yourself.'

'Maybe Hell will appreciate your failures, you sorry ass human being.'

'Everyone hates you, you control freak. They won't miss you if you're gone.'

'Fine, maybe someone else in a different universe wants you, because I don't.'

'Have fun sucking Zoro's cock, you cheating dick.'

'I just think it's funny that you'd go to him instead of me. I'm right here in front of you and you can't even get it up.'

'Hang yourself because I don't care.'

'Where are you?'

'I'm sorry for being such an idiot. I wish I was a bttr person.'

'I kno, I'm sorry.'

'I'm trying to stop.'

'I am happy with you! But when you push me away all the time, I feel useless.'

'Zoro?'

'It'll only stop when you stop trying to kill yourself.'

Sanji was numb. These horrible, ugly messages – clearly it was from the night out. Clearly, things were said in the heat of a terrible moment – he dropped the phone in shame, unable to handle the emotion that built up in his throat at that moment. But then he snatched it back up, realizing something horribly important.

The sent messages had all loaded in blue – the replies on the left side of the screen, were still in the process of being retrieved.

It didn't make sense.

He was only seeing one side of the conversation. _His_ side.

 _He'd_ been the one to say those horrible things.

This wasn't his phone. It was Law's.

He looked at it in shock, as if he were holding it for the first time. How did he not notice that the black iPhone was Law's? His was the rose gold model.

"Sanji?" he heard Luffy question. His arms wrapped around him, then, in a warm, strong hug. "Hey. Sanji. What is that? Hey. Sanji. HEY."

"How could I have said these terrible things?" Sanji asked on a low whisper, reading through them again. The messages were able to extend a few hours earlier.

'Blue cream, wheat bread, dish soap. The blue, not green,' he'd texted at 2:08 pm.

'Get off work, hurry up, I miss you,' he texted at 4:06 pm.

'Blue or black?' he'd texted at 4:08, a picture of him holding up Law's shirts.

'Black,' he'd texted at 4:08.

He'd sent a picture text of Winnie The Pooh with his head stuck in a honey pot. 'When Booface gets freaky AF.'

Another pic of their living room, sent at 4:39. 'This is how it needs to look when I come back home.'

Another pic of the kitchen, at 4:41, but there were drawings of added food on the counter, spilling from the cupboards, and a dirty sink. 'That sink better be dirty when I come home. I want to see cockroaches. Or just cock. Whichever.'

'NO CADAVER COCK EITHER, BATSARD.' 4:41 pm

'You home, yet? Just checking.' 4:59 pm

'You home? I took the trash out.' 5:02 pm

'Are you home?' 5:04 pm

'Why is it taking you so long to get home?' 5:05 pm

'LOL Forgot you had to get groceries.' 5:05 pm

'Are you ready?' 10:56 pm.

'Can't stand looking at you, sometimes.' 2:50 a.m.

There were replies to nearly every one of them, but they'd yet to be loaded. And when he went through the pictures again, he realized he was only looking at them from Law's point of view, because _he_ had been taking them. They were mostly of them together.

From their first date to last night. Nearly four years of photos. And he saw how he himself changed from a brilliantly smiling man in love to someone who looked like he was trying to make an effort in a smile, but it looked strained and tired. The conclusion he'd reached in that Law wasn't going to ask him to marry him was based off his own expressions in these photos.

He set the phone down and put his face into his hands. For the longest time, he could not speak. All he could see, hear and feel was the pain of his relationship ending; was the loss of not having Law with him, with seeing their love broken down into this violent, ugly mess.

Then he felt Luffy hugging him again, gently patting his head. He'd forgotten the kid was there, looking at everything with him. He might not be able to read the content of the texts, but he'd obviously seen the pictures.

"Don't tell anyone!" he snapped heavily, hearing his own voice tremble as he struggled to speak. "No one else needs to know what's happening."

"It's okay. Sanji. Whatever is happening right now, it's something that's hurting you. I would not take it lightly if it were something used against you in any way," Luffy said with confidence. "If this is what's happening in your world, then it's okay. I don't care that it's kinda weird. But it gives you feelings. And it makes sense if you're sad when you talk to him. But I will not tolerate it if someone says something that makes you uncomfortable. So I won't say anything."

For the longest time, Sanji could not say a thing. All he could see imprinted against the backs of his eyelids were those ugly things he'd said to Law. He couldn't even imagine being so horribly drunk that he could text such filth. His heart ached with such pain that he felt short of breath. Luffy held onto him, saying nothing, because there was nothing to say at that moment.

The phone vibrated at that time, startling them both. When Sanji looked at it, there was a new voice message.

He reached down to play it with numb fingers, hearing the scratchy, almost distorted voice of a man singing, ' _I've been loving you too long, to stop now_ …'

The song hit him at the same time the memory did. Without much of a thought, he picked the phone up and hurled it away from him with a shocked scream, and it was only Luffy's quick reaction and his extending arm that he caught it. Sanji pushed away from him, and ran out from the room, unable to breathe in such a small space. Luffy hollered after him in panic, but Sanji ran out onto the deck, and he jumped over the railing.

Once in the comforting space of the sea, he couldn't stop himself from screaming. The air bubbles that left him emerged as brilliant marbles, drifting aimlessly away from him. He tried to shut his eyes, to block out the memories that drifted back to him, but they unfolded over his thoughts with uncaring weight.

'I don't like this song,' he said.

'I needed to hear it again.'

'Turn it off. I hate it. It has nothing to do with us.'

'Listen, I had all night to think about things,' Law said, slurring his words slightly, reaching down to straighten his bowtie, his collar. 'It just needs to be us, again. _Just us_.'

'That's fine, but – I hate this song, turn it off! It's making you weird…'

Sanji felt very uneasy at that point. There were things said between them that needed to be addressed, but Otis Redding was begging for his love not to go, and it gave Sanji an uncomfortable feeling in his gut.

 _There was no way_.

He was _not_ dead.

He was _not dead_ , this was only half a memory.

There was _no way_ that things had turned this violent, this _wretched_ over one night.

He couldn't believe he'd sent those texts.

But this memory was a new one, and it filled him with fear, apprehension and ugly awareness.

He could feel the man's hands around his throat, and it wasn't right. There was no way Law would ever hurt him that way. He would _never_ do this to him. He was alive, he felt pain, he felt emotion, he could _breathe_ –

He stilled. He remembered everyone pointing out that he wasn't smoking. He smoked. He smoked like a damn chimney. But he hadn't had a cigarette since he'd arrived her. and these air bubbles – they were marble.

He looked up at them, awareness dawning on him.

He wasn't dead.

 _He wasn't dead_.

Law did not kill him.

 _Law would not do that to him_!

'I'm so sorry, I don't know what I was thinking.'

'You weren't, that's the problem.'

He jerked once he realized the steely grip on his arm, and looked up as Zoro yanked at him impatiently. The world around him swirled, almost violently. Sanji pulled back, but that grip definitely belonged to something inhuman. The stars around him shifted with such violence that it was almost as if he were falling backwards, and when Zoro turned to swim back to the surface, the stars seemed to blur and shift, pulling away from him.

Sanji struggled, pulling back, needing to be in that comfort of silence and serenity, but Zoro pull him through the water with solid strokes, and the world around Sanji shivered, and finally they broke through the surface.

"LET GO MORON! LET GO! LET ME STAY THERE! I NEED TO STAY THERE!" Sanji screamed as soon as his head broke the waters, and Zoro cringed and winced as Sanji beat on him, trying to return to the depths. But the man was made out of something that wasn't human, because nothing Sanji did stopped him from picking him up from the water, from climbing the rope ladder. "I don't want to be here! I want to go home! I need to go home!"

"Calm down, idiot, whatever's happening right now couldn't be that terrible! You're making it difficult for everyone right now!"

" _No_! No I need to go back! I need to go back home! This isn't right! None of this is right _I need to go home_!" Sanji yelled, looking back at the water with dismay.

"Chopper! Get him something!"

" _NNNOOO_ \- !"

He stilled, silencing immediately. He could still hear that song. Luffy had his phone in his hand, and that horrible _wretched_ song was still playing.

"TURN IT OFF!" he screamed as Zoro neared them. "TURN OFF THAT SONG! TURN IT OFFFFFF!"

"I don't know how!" Luffy cried in a panic, as Sanji's rising anxiety grew.

" _TURN IT OFF_!"

"AHHHHHH!" Luffy screamed, the cellphone bouncing in his hands as he flailed, panicking as Sanji began reaching for it, the rest of the crew reacting to the scene with varying degrees of panic themselves.

Finally, Robin snatched it out of Luffy's hand, examined the options, and pressed 'pause'. At the cessation of the melancholic song, Sanji wilted over Zoro's shoulder, trying to repress the rising screams that he wanted to release. He just held onto the man with both hands curled into his unmoving muscle – what was he made out of, exactly – and struggled to breathe. Chopper ran up with a syringe, jabbing it into his thigh without warning, and Sanji straightened in Zoro's grasp to swat at him, but the drug was fast acting.

The last he heard was, 'I love you, I need you in my life. I'm so sorry…'

: :

When he woke, it was dark. And his head pounded with a terrible headache, his eyes felt swollen. His throat raw. He felt liked he'd cried for days. The gentle sway of the ocean made him sick, but he wasn't sure if it were truly that, or just the new memories, the revelation of those text messages. His heart and soul ached with heavy pain, and there was no possible way to take it away.

He rubbed his chest, and felt moments from breaking. He might've been unable to hold back a whimper, but as soon as he heard it, it didn't take much to have his eyes fill with tears, for his mouth to crumble. The force of it hit him with such strength that he was powerless to hold it back any longer. For a few moments, he eked noises of mourning before screaming to release it from his chest.

He didn't want to believe that something terrible had happened.

This wasn't just a bad relationship problem; something happened that night, that morning to take one's life away. He refused to believe that his live-in, the love of his life, the man he wanted to spend every day with killed him. He refused to believe that he was dead. He didn't think he was dead – if he were, why wake up here?

Why wake up with these horrible memories?

That song, that despicable, miserable song – Law only listened to it at his lowest.

He wiped his face. _He wasn't dead_. He was alive, if he could feel such pain. Dead people couldn't feel this much pain.

"Come back!" he heard himself say morosely. " _Come back_! COME BACK! Come bbbbaacc _ckkkkk_ \- ! It needs to be _just us_ , it's only us, now!"

The door opened slowly, and Chopper peeked in with large teary eyes. "Sanji, _please_ , let me give you something – "

"No. Let it go, " Law told him firmly, startling Sanji. The man was sitting nearby, almost one with the shadows at the corner of the room. Just seeing him caused tears to spill over his cheeks, for the pain to hit him again.

"COME BAACCKKK!" he couldn't help but say again, not even knowing why he was saying it.

"But it could help - !" Chopper argued, eyes spilling with his own sympathy.

"Sometimes, you need to let the pain run its course. Delaying it does nothing but extend it, Mr Tony," Law said patiently, over Sanji's broken sobs.

" _I'm not dead_! I'm _not_!"

Chopper didn't like it, but he himself was unable to stand listening to those mournful cries. He sniffled hard and retreated, closing the door behind him. Just beyond him were seven faces with varying stages of melancholic expression, and Ussop was running out of tissue.

"I need to wake up! I need to go home – _I need to go home_ , these things don't make any sense!" Sanji cried. "I need to go home and make sure he's there! _I need to go hooommmmmeeeee_!"

Law knew there was nothing he could say to comfort the man in any way. He looked over at him, sitting slowly in the chair against the corner of the room. He knew he was the only one that could be here at this moment – the Strawhats' nearby presence was expected. If one were suffering, then all of them would share that pain. If Sanji needed them, they were there, ready to provide. Only it was a strange situation – this one wasn't their friend. He was just a stranger wearing their friend's skin.

He reached into his jacket pocket for the device Luffy had been carrying around for Sanji. There was a text bubble visible on the screen, and it would vibrate and flash, but he had no idea what it said. The language wasn't something he was familiar with.

Some minutes later, Sanji must have heard it. he lifted his head, where he was sitting hunched over, gripping the sheets. He looked over with a sniff, blinking swollen eyes. Law stood and walked it over to him, holding it out. Once Sanji took it, he read the front.

'…I've read your messages over a thousand times, and I've come to the conclusion that both of us can't continue on with this farce.'

Law's replies were loaded on the message board. Wiping his nose with the back of his hand, Sanji scrolled through what he hadn't been able to read, before. After he was done, he powered the phone down. He put it atop of the stand nearby. Then he stared up at the ceiling for the longest time in silence, unable to say or think anything else.

' _Send me a list_.' 1:34 pm

'Blue cream, wheat bread, dish soap. The blue, not green,' 2:08 pm

' _Vanilla coffee creamer, blue dish soap. Got it_.' 2:09 pm

'Get off work, hurry up, I miss you.' 4:06 pm

'Blue or black?' 4:08 pm

'Black,' 4:08 pm

' _Blue_!' 4:16 pm

'When Booface gets freaky AF.'

' _When Booface looks for his phone in the trash_.'

'This is how it needs to look when I come back home.' 4:39 pm

'That sink better be dirty when I come home. I want to see cockroaches. Or just cock. Whichever.' 4:41 pm

'NO CADAVER COCK EITHER, BATSARD.' 4:41 pm

' _Aw, but I have one just waiting to be used. And most people like a clean kitchen_.' 4:43 pm

'You home, yet? Just checking.' 4:59 pm

' _No_.' 5:01 pm

'You home? I took the trash out.' 5:02 pm

' _Still no_.' 5:02 pm

'Are you home?' 5:04 pm

' _Negatory_.' 5:04 pm

'Why is it taking you so long to get home?' 5:05 pm

'LOL Forgot you had to get groceries.' 5:05 pm

' _Dumb ass_.' 5:14 pm

'Are you ready?' 10:56 pm

'Can't stand looking at you, sometimes.' 2:50 am

' _I c that_.' 2:50 am

'You can be someone else's problem. Kill yourself.' 2:51 am

' _What a shitty thing to say._ ' 2:51 am

'Maybe Hell will appreciate your failures, you sorry ass human being.' 2:51 am

' _Maybe you should go there with me, you drunk piece of shit_.' 2:52 am

'Everyone hates you, you control freak. They won't miss you if you're gone.' 2:52 am

' _We should just go our seprate ways, Sanji. This is too much_.' 2:52 am

'Fine, maybe someone else in a different universe wants you, because I don't.' 2:52 am

' _No one in their right mind would want you back, you glutton ape_.' 2:52 am

'Have fun sucking Zoro's cock, you cheating dick.' 2:53 am

' _NO ONE'S CHEATING_!' 2:54 am

'I just think it's funny that you'd go to him instead of me. I'm right here in front of you and you can't even get it up.' 2:54 am

' _Look in the mirror, you ugly fuck_.' 2:54 am

'Hang yourself because I don't care.' 2:55 am

' _Answer your phone_. 2: 59 am

 _I'm serious, answer your phone_. 3:00 am

 _I'm sorry, please answer your phone_. 3:01 am

 _please answer_. 3:02 am

 _Let me be a better person to you. We can do this together_. 3:02 am

 _Why aren't you answering? Pick up_. 3:03 am

 _I love you, I need you in my life. I'm so sorry_. 3:05 am

 _PICK UP_!' 3:06 am


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Annnnd…this.**

 **Warning: character death, relationship violence triggers**

 **Chapter Thirteen –**

In two days, Sanji would be gone for nearly a month. He'd been admitted to rehab – his second attempt at sobriety – and he wanted a 'final' night out with the others. It almost canceled out the intention of the goal, but Law wasn't going to stop him. This was something Sanji really wanted to do. Their fights had been getting more and more intense, and it was mainly because of Sanji's habits. If they were to save their relationship, Sanji felt it was up to him to change.

Then they would work on Law's depression.

He looked at the prescription in hand, frowning at the fine print. All the do's and don'ts. It was because of it that he felt he'd changed. His mood swings were incredible, and he felt Sanji drank more because of it. In public and with the patients he saw, he felt he could deal with it fine. He was a little surlier, but he went the extra mile just to make sure his patients didn't suffer because of it. But as soon as he got home, Sanji received the brunt of it, and he didn't take it quietly. They'd come to blows a few times, and it was obvious that both of them were dysfunctional, but neither of them did well without the other. Zoro often mentioned that they were just a timebomb ready to explode.

The man had been immensely helpful – Zoro was Sanji's best friend, and Zoro felt that Sanji was out of control. Zoro had made the effort to talk to Law about encouraging Sanji to rehab, and even helped him put together a plan when Law was feeling low and couldn't get to Sanji for his reassurance.

'Just text or call me if you feel weird, and we'll do something manly,' Zoro had said uncomfortably. 'It's only for a month. I know you depend on him for that.'

Law had assured him that he would, feeling weird about it. But then again, he really wanted Sanji to complete his rehab successfully. He wanted this to work. He wanted them to be _okay_.

 _"Do Not Take With Alcohol_."

He knew the consequences of the combination. But to him, it didn't really make a difference in his behavior, other than made him a little more numb to things. Sanji had already started his day with a six pack, and Nami had already brought over her specialty vodka shots. Both of them were getting ridiculously loud in the living room, so Law felt that if he were feeling a little numb, Sanji's actions and words wouldn't affect him so much.

It was just one more night. It wasn't as if he'd drink anymore than the few beers he usually had when he went out with them.

He dumped a single pill in hand and washed it down with the contents of his bottle nearby, setting it carefully on the bathroom sink. Then he put the container of pills away, and looked at himself in the mirror.

"No more than three," he told himself sternly.

"It's not going to talk back to you," Sanji said in passing, looking for the rest of his outfit.

"The mirror gives me better advice than you ever could!"

"Looks better, too."

"Stupid."

"I'm going to go pick up Ussop. I'll meet you guys there," Nami called out, slamming the front door without waiting for an answer.

"Pooh Bear! Where's my thingy! The black one?"

"Under the thingy with the red things."

"Har, har."

When Sanji returned to him, he was fiddling with the bowtie, and he had his vest in place. "You'll be okay while I'm gone, right? They do allow phone calls. You need to call me every day."

"I will. I'll be fine."

"If you feel any different, call your therapist. If you feel really bad, please, I'll come home, and - "

"I'll be _fine_. I've been looking forward to having this place to myself."

"You're such a dick."

"I'm kidding. I'll miss you. It'll be weird with you not around. Constantly in my face, asking me stupid shit and doing stupid shit."

"I'll take that! Let's go. Oh, wait, I need to find my phone."

"I have it charging in the kitchen," Law said. He looked at himself in the mirror once more, feeling the familiarity of the dulling sensation crowd him. His face felt numb. His mood felt passive. For a few moments, he stood there, and tried not to think of how silent the apartment would be without Sanji around. The man made so much noise going from room to room that he often yelled at him for it, but not having him around for a full month was starting to have him worry a bit.

Who would be there to talk him out of it when the darkness was getting too suffocating? Who would be there to text him entire conversations when he couldn't get out of bed? Who was going to be there for him when he knew he shouldn't be alone, and all it took was Sanji touching him to remind him that he wasn't alone – this medication was supposed to help, but it seemed to make things worse. He would have to mention it to his therapist after tonight.

His cellphone buzzed from his back pocket, and he sluggishly pulled it from his jeans, looking at it.

'Are you ready?'

"Yes!" he shouted in response.

"You're such a space cadet, sometimes. Pull your head out from the stars."

"I'd rather be up there than down here. This miserable Hell."

"Don't make me chase after you, you know how lonely I get," Sanji said, peeking into the bathroom at him. His expression was worried, looking at him for anything other than what Law was telling him. "You sure you'll be okay? I'd hate to leave if – "

"I'll be _fine_. You need to do this. I'm this close to killing you, sometimes."

"Don't threaten me with a good time. Love you, Pooh Bear, grouchy ass."

"This will probably be the last of our good mood with each other tonight, so, know that I love you too, even if you're a dumbass," Law returned to him, kissing his forehead as Sanji gave a rue smile. It was almost uncomfortably funny how it seemed that they often expressed affection to each other before an evening out; almost as if they were telling each other 'goodbye'. Most often, they ended up fighting and saying terrible things to each other that required a lot of making up to do a day or so later. One day, this stupid habit would be no more.

"I can't wait until this shit is over with. I feel like we'll be starting over in a brand new place," Sanji confessed, reaching for his hand as they walked towards the front door. "I want to be a better person, so bad."

"Then work hard. Don't fuck it up."

"You, too," Sanji said, fumbling with locking the door behind him as Law continued to pull his hand, yanking him with deliberate action. Sanji pulled his hand from his and returned to the task, slamming the door with final action. Then he caught up to the other man down the stairway, and snatched his hand again. He jerked him to a stop and down so he could kiss him. "I love you so much. After I get better, I just know that I can help you, too. Then it'll truly be just us, and not us _and_ beer and pills."

"Now _that_ is something I could look forward to."

: :

"You're not going to vomit all over me again, are you?"

Sanji laughed and slumped over his lap, too drunk to sit steady. He pretended to give Law a blowjob, but Law grabbed a handful of his hair and shoved him away, causing Sanji to laugh again, resting his head down on his thigh and turning his head the other way. As he did so, he caught sight of a familiar face looking at him with shock from across the dance floor. Once he realized it was his younger brother, Yonji, he snorted. Then stuck his tongue out in his direction, hugging Law's waist tightly with both arms.

Yonji looked disgusted, but now he understood why Sanji cut himself away from the family. He turned and disappeared into the crowd without anything else.

"Wow, he's already smashed," Nami said with concern, beer mug empty.

"Get him another one, he'll pass right out," Zoro said, finishing off his own.

"True friends make you drink until you die," Ussop commented sarcastically.

"Another round!" Shachi cried, waving his money in the air.

"Another round!" Nami shouted. "Fireball me!"

"Another round!" Sanji cried, but the words didn't come out right.

When he looked at Law, the man looked pissed and uncomfortable, but Sanji thought that Law was just spoiling the fun with his attitude. When he had too much to drink, he always had too much to think about. Plus he kept looking over Sanji's head, and Sanji didn't feel good about it, because he knew who he was looking at. He hated that Law was starting to rely on Zoro more, talking to him for far longer than he felt comfortable with. He hated feeling that they had something going on, but they often ate out together, or were talking low to each other whenever Sanji wandered away from Law's side.

"If you're going to spew, spew into this," Ussop said, snickering as he passed him a folded paper cup from his pocket.

"You waited for this moment all night, didn't you?" Zoro asked him.

When the waitress came back, all of them took the glasses with cheers. Law tried to push Sanji's glass out of his grasp, but Sanji pushed his hand back, and both of them ended up spilling the contents on both of their shirts.

Zoro watched them warily. The group of them were used to their fights, but they only got physical with each other after both of them had been drinking too much. Each were pleasant people sober, but once they started drinking, it was a different story. All their demons emerged when their control disappeared.

"Should you be drinking that?" Zoro asked Law.

"It's not going to do anything," Law answered, wiping at his wet shirt with a disgusted frown.

"Yes, but there's a warning label for a reason…"

"It's fine! Actually, I'm pretty close to vomiting, anyway. It'll cancel everything out."

" _Stop_ ," Sanji whined, pushing his face to the side. "Stop talking to him in front of me. Carry on with your affair when I'm not here, like proper adultists. Adultsss. Adultry. Audility."

"Jesus, don't buy him any more!" Zoro snapped at the others, as Law shoved Sanji's hand from his face. He heard Sanji slap him, laughing as he did so, and Law shoved him violently, visibly growing angry.

Zoro reached out and grabbed Sanji's hand before he could repeat the motion. "STOP. _Stop!_ Hands to yourself, damn it!"

' _It was only supposed to be us_!' Sanji snapped at him.

'This is _your_ fault -!' Zoro growled back, feeling like a referee.

"Don't touch him, we're fine," Law said, pushing Zoro's hand away from Sanji as Sanji just sat there, looking like he was moments from throwing up.

"I'm just trying to - !"

"It's _just us_ , okay?"

 _Jesus, you can't take these guys anywhere_ , Zoro thought bitterly, shaking his head. To the others, he said, "Cut him off, too. No more for either of these guys."

"And in the red corner, we have Sanji, the overly jealous drunk! And in the blue corner, Law, the suicidal slugger!" Nami bellowed grandly into an empty shot glass.

Zoro frowned at her. "It's not funny, idiot."

"Well, it's true."

"Stop looking at him when I'm in front of you, you cheater," Sanji said to Law, mouth barely moving. He was too drunk to hold a coherent conversation, too unsteady to hold himself up. So he slumped once again over his boyfriend's lap, arms dangling over his legs while everyone else danced around them.

Nami got Zoro laughing again, drinking from large mugs. Ussop was clinging to the counter, Shachi was on his phone, and while Sanji was vaguely concerned over Yonji's appearance, all he worried about was the distance growing between him and Law.

"Who, your brother?" Law asked with irritation, pushing him off his lap, embarrassed by his loud voice and touchy mannerisms. He'd already caught sight of Yonji looking in their direction, earlier. "Straighten up, you fat lump."

Sanji sat up, but had to lean on him again, slurring, "I don't care."

Law used a shoulder to push him away. "You will give a shit when he tells the others."

Sanji leaned in close to say into his ear, " _I don't care_."

Law pushed his face away with an irritated expression. "You should've told them a long time ago."

Sanji poked his forehead with a finger, and Law grabbed that finger and bent it backward so hard that Sanji cried out, retracting it. For a few moments, he rubbed sensation back into that digit, then reached for Ussop's half filled mug. He took a long drink, belching after. Then said, "They don't care."

"I think we've had too much," Law said to him, taking the glass out of his hand, "Because I feel like beating the shit out of you, again. It's funny when you're trying to talk to me with a broken nose."

"That was my last one! Give it back! If I'm going to stop drinking, let this be the very last one!" Sanji had whined, sitting up. When he couldn't get what he wanted, he slapped him, and Law snatched his hand from the air and shoved him hard. Sanji barely caught himself, but he slapped him again. He laughed when Law grabbed that hand and shoved it back into his face.

"Worthless piece of trash, that's what you said the last time, and the last time before that! Goddamn it, I don't want to carry you home, again!"

"Just call a fucking taxi! Send me away by myself! That's what responsible people do! Send me to Hong Kong!"

"I'm tired of babysitting you, Sanji!"

"Tired of babysitting, huh? I get it. Because you're getting tired of _me_. I drink too much, smoke too much, eat too much – everything is too much for you. Self conscious, shy, perfect proportional Dr Trafalgar, you're better off with someone who is more in control of himself," Sanji heard himself slur, nearly slipping off the stool and onto the floor as he moved to walk away. "You can have him, Zoro! You want him so much! But I want him back in the morning when you're done."

" _What the fuck_ ," Zoro muttered with embarrassment.

Sanji felt Law kick his back and it caused him to stumble and fall onto the dance floor. Shachi tripped over him, and other dancers tripped over _him_. When he managed to pick himself up, he turned pick up the mug Nami had ordered and flung it at Law. He ducked as beer splashed over him, and their friends instantly crowded around them to keep them separated.

" _Fat fuck_ , I'll drag your ass outside and make you regret that!" Law shouted, Shachi and Ussop holding him back as Nami laughed uproariously, pretending to be Bruce Buffer. A waitress and a bouncer looked at them with concern, but once they saw Zoro had the situation handled, they started to relax.

"Drink some water, you don't look good," Shachi said to Law, helping him back to his chair. "Seriously, man, don't drink anymore. You're done. You're not even supposed to be drinking with your medication."

"It's just for the night. After this, no more nights out," Law said, taking the napkins Nami passed him. "And I don't feel any different. I'm fine. He was just…more stupid tonight than he was before…he knows I'm going to miss him."

"Okay, okay, enough, I actually don't know what you're trying to say," Shachi said, looking at Ussop for confirmation. Law's words were emerging as drunken slurs, and Shachi barely got the gist of what he was saying. He signaled for some water, and the waitress hurriedly accommodated him. "Just get sober, man. That's all everyone needs from you, right now. Zoro will make sure Sanji gets home."

"Give me a few hours," Law told him. "Because if I go home after him, it won't be pretty."

" _Yikes_. Like, seriously, hearing that. _Yikes_."

"It's time for you to go home," Zoro was saying to Sanji, dragging him to the door.

"Why do _I_ have to go? Why does _he_ get to stay? It's not fair, because I know exactly why you're doing this!" Sanji protested, no match against Zoro's strength as he pulled him out of the club, and hailed a taxi. "I'm going home by myself? It's not _fair_!"

"Just go home and pass out. It'll be easier for the rest of us."

"You mean, easier for _you_ now that I'm out of the way," Sanji snapped as a taxi pulled up to join the small line outside of the bar, and Zoro gave the address as he stuffed Sanji in the back seat. Sanji kicked him, catching him in the face and having him stumble back. "Boyfriend stealer! He steals people's boyfriends! Put an APB out on him! Thief! Thief!"

"If you weren't such a fucking mess, then this would've never happened," Zoro told him, slamming the door as the taxi pulled away.

 _Yeah, there's that_ , Sanji thought drunkenly, slumping against the other door as the cab driver winced, hoping he didn't throw up. _I'm just a worthless mess_.

He looked at the cab driver, then, realizing he didn't need some stranger taking him home. So he opened the door and fell out, and the car slammed on its brakes. The driver had been slowing for a stop light, anyway, so Sanji didn't hit that hard, but once he was able to pick himself up, he hurried away from the concerned man.

It took a few minutes to make it back to the bar, but he didn't go back in. instead, he went looking for familiar vehicles. He found Zoro's, and went looking for something to throw at it. He found some good sized rocks from a nearby garden border of a fast food place, and broke the windshield. After he felt satisfied with the damage, he went looking for Law's car. He broke the headlights, then the windshield, then carved in 'Cheater' with the same rock that he'd used to break Zoro's windshield. By this time, some people had caught sight of him doing this, so he dropped the rock and hurried away.

He didn't feel good about it, but at least he let them know what he felt. On the way back home, he pulled his cellphone out from his blazer pocket. He didn't give it a second thought in that he was walking in the middle of the road, several cars honking at him impatiently as they drove around him, yelling.

Once he found the number he was looking for, he dialed it, flipping off the car that swerved around him, narrowing hitting him. Once his father answered, he hollered, "I'm fucking with a man! That's what you're going to hear! You want to hear more? Kiss my ass!"

Then hung up before Raijii could say anything in response. Sanji felt pretty good about that one. At least he would find out from Sanji rather than his rotten brothers. All in all, it was a pretty good outcome for being kicked out of the bar. He laughed as he stumbled over the sidewalk edge, then fell flat on his face. He dropped his phone. For a few moments he just laid there, trying to get his breath back. He rolled over saw the stars above him, just faintly visible above the edges of the city's light pollution. He wondered why Law was so obsessed with the night sky. Then Sanji picked himself up and found his phone and continued on home.

Once there, he stumbled in and dropped into the easy chair nearby. He was still angry. So he tapped out some messages to make himself feel better.

'Can't stand looking at you, sometimes.'

'I c that,' came the surprisingly fast reply.

'You can be someone else's problem. Kill yourself.'

'What a shitty thing to say.'

'Maybe Hell will appreciate your failures, you sorry ass human being.'

'Maybe you should go there with me, you drunk piece of shit.'

'Everyone hates you, you control freak. They won't miss you if you're gone.'

'We should just go our seprate ways, Sanji. This is too much.'

'Fine, maybe someone else in a different universe wants you, because I don't.'

'No one in their right mind would want you back, you glutton ape.'

'Have fun sucking Zoro's cock, you cheating dick.'

'NO ONE'S CHEATING!'

'I just think it's funny that you'd go to him instead of me. I'm right here in front of you and you can't even get it up.'

'Look in the mirror, you ugly fuck.'

'Hang yourself because I don't care.'

There were other replies, but Sanji tossed his phone away. He felt tired after all his actions, and he wandered away from the living room and flopped onto his bed with a huge sigh, giving absolutely no regard to what just happened. He didn't hear his phone ringing, and it continued to flash with both ringing and text messages.

'Answer your phone.

I'm serious, answer your phone.

I'm sorry, please answer your phone.

please answer.

Let me be a better person to you. We can do this together.

Why aren't you answering? Pick up.

I love you, I need you in my life. I'm so sorry.

PICK UP!'

When he woke up the next morning, Sanji was still alone. Sickeningly hung over, he stumbled to the apartment balcony to look out in the parking lot, hoping to see Law's car. But he noticed that it was starting to snow. He walked outside, feeling sick. his head swam, his mouth was cottony - he felt dizzy, as if the world was swaying without his permission. His own thoughts felt sluggish, his head pounding with a headache.

He reached out to catch a few flakes on the palm of his hand.

At the same time he did this, a screech of tires on pavement alerted him to movement, and he looked down to see his brothers pull up to his apartment, leaving their car parked in the emergency fire zone. The three of them moved briskly, with grim faces, and they were moving up the stairway with heavy footfalls. Sanji remembered with a sullen frown seeing Yonji catch sight of him hanging all over Law last night. He couldn't remember anything else. He was too hungover for this, right now.

He went for his cellphone, and tapped out a message. 'Where are you?'

He walked back inside and shut the sliding door as one of them pounded at the front door. It wouldn't keep the three of them out for very long.

'I'm at work,' came the reply.

The locks rattled as one of them began kicking it.

Sanji knew in his heart that was a lie. He covered his face with one shaking hand, trying to compose himself. Then he began writing again. 'I'm sorry for being such an idiot. I wish I was a bttr person.'

'If you weren't so fucking pathetic maybe id' respect you more.'

Sanji wiped his hair behind his ears. He was used to those words. He made it difficult for himself when he picked up a bottle. 'I kno, I'm sorry.'

'You drink too much.'

He watched as the chain caught the door, Ichiji cursing as the wood slapped him in the face upon its rebound. 'I'm trying to stop.'

Niji laughed.

'You act like such an idiot when you drink, it's embarrassing. Fucking up our cars make you feel better, asshole?'

Sanji was puzzled reading that, but then he noticed the other messages he'd been texting. Horror pulled at his features, took his breath away. He absolutely could not believe how heartless he'd been, saying such things to someone he loved, who was having such a difficult time adapting to meds he used to treat his depression. He had no idea what he'd done to the cars. It would explain why Law wasn't home.

He looked over as Ichiji pushed and shoved at the door, his younger brothers laughing at his efforts. He still had some time to text.

'I wish I could have made you as happy with me as I am with you,' Law texted him.

'I am happy with you! But when you push me away all the time, I feel useless.'

'I don't mean to.'

'Zoro?'

'We only talk about your drinking. It grew worse before you decided to go to rehab.'

'It'll only stop when you stop trying to kill yourself,' he texted as Yonji helped Ichiji push the door in, causing the chain to dislocate from the frame.

'Then it'll never stop. This world is worthless. But when it's just us, it's all I want.'

Sanji put his phone down to face the three head on. "What the fuck do you want?"

"You think it's funny, calling pops up the way you did? He sent us to deliver a nice little one-two for that mouthy face of yours, you disgusting turd," Ichiji snarled, stalking over towards him.

"It's too bad I don't remember that at all," Sanji replied with a grimace, reaching out to stop him from crowding him against the wall. "I suppose I had way too much, again."

"Don't worry, we'll help you get over it real quick," Niji said, pushing his brother aside with a kick towards Sanji.

"Heard you needed a new back alignment, anyway," Yonji commented. "We're your new chiropractors!"

Sanji started fighting back as they bullrushed him, but he was just too hungover, and there were three of them. So he just did what he could to keep them from overwhelming him too greatly. He knew it was a losing battle, anyway.

An hour later, he heard the front door crash to the floor, where he'd tried to put it back up after his brothers left. He removed the ice pack from his face, grabbing a nearby knife just in case they'd come back for more. But it was only Law, looking as wrecked as Sanji felt. He held onto the doorframe, visibly swaying and looking as if he'd had only an hour's worth of sleep.

It was only then that Sanji worried about last night's effects on the medication that Law took.

"What happened?" he asked in sluggish action, looking at Sanji's face.

"Are you feeling alright?" Sanji asked him cautiously.

"What'd you do to your face?"

"Look, don't worry about it. They're still on probation, I'll just file a police report and call their parole officer," Sanji said as Law walked away from him, veering off to their iPod speaker nearby. He watched him with a curious expression as he found a certain song, and when he turned it up, Sanji looked at him with protest. Why Law wanted to listen to this particular song at this particular time made him suspicious and uneasy.

' _I've been loving you too long, to stop now_ …'

"I don't like this song," he whined.

"I needed to hear it again."

"Turn it off. I hate it. It has nothing to do with us."

"Listen, I had all night to think about things," Law said, slurring his words slightly, reaching down to straighten his bowtie, his collar. "It just needs to be us, again. _Just us_."

"That's fine, but – I hate this song, turn it off! It's making you weird…"

Sanji felt very uneasy at that point. Whether it was the fact that both of them were hungover, there were things said between them that needed to be addressed, but the way Law looked at him made him feel as if he should be more alert than he should. Otis Redding was begging for his love not to go, and it gave Sanji an uncomfortable feeling in his gut.

"I can't let anybody in-between us, anymore. I keep being this bad person to you with my problems, and I need to stop. I've read your messages over a thousand times, and I've come to the conclusion that both of us can't continue on with this farce."

"You're creeping me out," Sanji confessed, reaching out to place a hand on his chest. "Pooh Bear. Let's go pass out. Let's go sleep for awhile, okay?"

"No, no, it was clear to me that this will never end," Law told him, enveloping him into a hug. "This. Both of us. Just us."

"Okay, okay, yes, it'll only be us. Just me and you, but let's go lay down, okay? I'll get the door fixed later. Let's go to sleep."

"Yes. Go to sleep. But first, piss. Need to piss. Come with me."

Sanji didn't have a choice, Law dragged him with him, still hugging him close, and Sanji waddled with his longer strides as they moved in the direction of the bathroom. He held the knife carefully away from him, not wanting to put it down, just yet. His instincts were trying to tell him something, but he wasn't sure what. It might've only been a remnant from his brothers' visit, and with the front door down, he didn't exactly feel safe.

"You walk all the way here?" he asked suspiciously.

"Someone, I'm not saying who, fucked up my car. Zoro's having it towed, and he's going to come back here to drop off Luffy's car so I can drive you to the place tomorrow."

Sanji felt rotten, putting everyone out in this manner. He really couldn't wait to go to rehab, certain it would change their lives for the better. "I'm so sorry, I don't know what I was thinking."

"You weren't, that's the problem, my love."

With one arm, Law shut the door behind him, locking it, and resumed holding onto him. Sanji thought it was really odd that he was behaving in this manner, but if Law wanted to hold him while he was pissing, then it was fine. He closed his eyes because he really wanted to be useful, to make up for all the horrible things he'd said the night before.

But instead of moving for the toilet, Law's hands shifted from around him, moving up to adjust his collar, then suddenly wrapping around his neck. In alarm, Sanji looked up at him, unable to think as those long, thin fingers closed around his throat. For several horrified seconds, he couldn't move, then Law was pushing him down against the sink, and once the weight of the man's intentions finally sank in, Sanji started to struggle.

He lifted his hand to push Law off, struggling to breathe, but he saw that he was still holding onto the kitchen knife. A strange silence started to build over the rushing sounds in his ears. His jaw clenched tightly, and panic made him struggle. He stabbed the man in the arm, too horrified to accept that it was happening; unable to deliver any punishing action because there was a part of them that believed this was just One of Those Times, where they would be okay, they just – needed – to – _pass_ – out

Law's fingers tightened, and Sanji couldn't breathe, unable to eke a sound. He was losing feeling to his hand, so he now started to stab desperately.

Law was panting tightly, out of physical exertion. "It just needs to be us, again. _Just us_. No one else. No family, no friends to judge us."

Sanji tried to talk, but he couldn't. He started to see stars. The knife fell out of his grasp, and he latched onto the hands that only seemed to tighten further. He couldn't seem to hear any sound other than the rushing in his ears, and his heart was slamming so hard in his chest that he couldn't seem to feel anything else.

He heard Zoro's voice at that moment, calling for them both as he walked into the apartment with a curious noise over the broken door. After a few moments, there was a hard knock at the door, Zoro standing outside of it.

"Law!" Zoro called against the door, knocking on it. "Is Sanji in there with you?"

"Just me! Pissing," Law answered, almost pleasantly.

"I got Luffy's car. I'll leave the keys on the counter. Where's Sanji?"

"Almost out."

"What happened to the door?"

"It was like that – when – I got here!"

Sanji felt himself go utterly limp against the sink. When his body couldn't hold itself, Law went down with him, the loud clatter of sound causing Zoro to knock on the door impatiently.

"You _okay_?"

But the movement allowed a slight loosening of Law's hands on Sanji's neck, as he had to adjust to sit over him. And in that moment, Sanji gasped in loudly, coughing and choking as Law resumed choking him. Sanji's hand fluttered about, scratching at his face, then feeling the floor for the knife. Once he found it, Zoro knocking on the door again, the door knob tried, Sanji stabbed him over and over, kicking his legs out uselessly, trying to get free.

"Law? Was that Sanji? You guys okay? C'mon, open the door. _Open the door_ , man. Open it up. Let me know you're okay."

" _We're fine_!"

"So he's in there with you? Sanji, you okay? Please tell me you guys are just getting nasty, or something, just answer me."

"We're fine, getting nasty, go away!"

Zoro left the door, grumbling about bad timing.

"You're going with me to Hell, because you're the only one that understands me, okay?" Law told Sanji. "Remember saying that?"

Sanji managed to get the knife between them, using it to jab at his hands. It loosed them slightly, enough for him to choke in air, coughing violently.

" _I can't breathe_!"

"That's too bad. It's only us, now," Law said, fighting him to get to his neck, sitting atop of him so that Sanji really had no where else to go. So Sanji continued stabbing him, thoughtless to anything else. "Let me do this. I'll end this suffering."

"OPEN THE DOOR!" Zoro's voice suddenly bellowed, as the door shuddered with his kicking it.

Sanji panted for breath, knife at his throat, unable to believe that it had come to this. "Is that really a good thing?" he managed to whisper. "Who's more dangerous?"

"OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!"

"You're the one with the knife."

" _You're_ the one with his hands around my neck!"

Hearing the obvious sounds of a struggle, Zoro reached for his phone, completed the dialing as he heard things crashing to the floor.

"I just want to save us both. After coming to that conclusion last night, I realize this is the only thing to do. No one can talk you out of drinking, and no one can save me from the darkness. So I'm taking us both to a place where we can't hurt anybody else," Law told him calmly, smiling, managing to wrap his fingers around his neck once more.

"Even in madness, I still love seeing you smile," Sanji said tightly, having trouble speaking. "You stopped smiling."

"Don't say that when you're the reason for my madness."

"Fuck you, both! _Open the fucking door_!"

Sanji managed to hit him again with the knife. Once it refused to budge, he put what strength he had into it so that he could shove the other man off his chest. For a moment, it looked like Law wasn't going to move, but his fingers loosened from his neck, allowing him to draw him breath. Sanji coughed and sputtered, panting heavily, his head woozy. He couldn't seem to draw in enough air.

But once he realized what he'd done, where he'd made the true killing blow, he was speechless. Zoro was pushing and slamming into the door, talking to the operator in a frantic tone, but Sanji wasn't focused on it. All he heard was the vicious struggle for breath. Law's hands were shaking as they reached for him, and his blood was all over Sanji, staining his clothes.

Sanji watched him struggle, horror icing his veins. But he didn't look away. He didn't move. The knife made it impossible for the other man to breathe, and his blood pooled onto the bathroom floor around him. Sanji knew at once that this was something he could never fix.

So he leaned over him, stroking his hair with comfort, laying over him gently as Law watched him, turning blue. A greyish tinge that caused his veins to pulse blue.

"Move on. I'll come find you," Sanji assured him in a gentle whisper.

It took several moments for Law to even speak. Each word a sputter of what remained of his ability to speak. "E-e-ven 'f I do thisss?"

" _Even_ if you do this."

"But 'm a mess."

"You're the mess I created," Sanji told him, resting his forehead against his, smelling the thick scent of alcohol from the sweat on his skin, the copper stench of his blood.

"What 'f not in s' place?"

"It won't matter, Pooh Bear, Booface. I'll save you no matter where you go. I love you. It's just us, okay?"

When the last of his air was gone, Law left him. Sanji watched his blood build around the nearby floor vent. He was soaked in it. He rose to a sitting position, numbly wiping off his vest. His head felt swollen. He attempted to straighten his bowtie, fix his hair.

He stood on shaking legs, looking down at the man that had been his companion. Then he reached over and opened the bathroom door, Zoro looking at him with horror. When he pushed Sanji aside to see what happened, he went pale.

"I tripped," Sanji said tonelessly.

"No, you didn't… I fucking hate you both," Zoro said in a near whisper, unable to look away from the prone body.

"I gotta go find him, b-r-b," Sanji told him, walking out from the bathroom, leaving a trail of footprints behind him. Zoro numbly registered that he left, but he didn't know what to do. The bathroom was a mess. Clearly, there had been a struggle. He couldn't imagine what had happened. It felt like a dream. It felt like he were being pranked. These two were always fighting. Law would reveal the fake knife in his throat, and Sanji would laugh and say it was payback for last night's transgressions.

But then he realized what Sanji had just said, and turned, leaving the bathroom, headed for the bedroom. But Sanji wasn't in there. He looked down at the floor, and realized those bloody footprints faded just outside the front door. But a look outside told him Sanji was no where to be seen. When he returned to the living room, he couldn't move any longer. Shock took over.

He heard sirens in the distance.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: "Together We Will Live Forever" by Clint Mansell is perfect for this chapter.**

 **AND THAT'S A WRAP FOR THIS TRAGIC PIECE OF ANGST THAT WAS CAUGHT IN MY GRASP.**

 **And to answer all your comments from chapter 12:**

 **Naghi-Tan: me too. Music's pretty important, for me, so when I hear something associated with anything, I'm the first one to turn that shit off. Thank you for reading and commenting, friend!**

 **Guest#1: Now you know the rest of it D: Thank you for all your comments and theories and I am hugely happy for your response to my fic, for knowing that it affected you in some way made me happy as a writer.**

 **Lily: ZoSan is definitely my breath of oxygen. I have argued in defense of their relationship to anybody that dares ask me about One Piece in general. While I very much adore LawSan, it's the ZoSan that gets me going because maybe there's more of ZoSan than there is of LawSan. :D Thank you for commenting, and sharing with me your theories! Now that this story is over…yah.**

 **Alasse-m: haha now you know the entirety of it! Thank you for commenting and reading!**

 **SiberianRS: Yeah, it's a very sad song. And now I can't listen to it the same way. T_T. I always do this to myself, dammit. I wonder how you feel at the end of this fic? Listen to 'Take Me Somewhere Nice' by Mogwai, now, this song was mostly the inspo of this story.**

 **Chapter Fourteen –**

Hours later, the phone was at 100% now that Sanji looked at it again. He felt numb from the inside out. He still didn't understand the charge. He didn't understand why he was here. Was he here in Hell after what he'd done? How was he still alive after what happened?

He truly was alone. He had no one to go home to, if Law was dead. There wasn't purpose if the man was out of his reach.

He looked at his hands. His clothes, this weird pirate material, were entirely bloodstained. From the collar down, the sleeves – _all_ of it was soaked with Law's blood. He'd killed the man – but was it self-defense when he'd put him in that state? Everything that had come back to him now all made sense. All of it was now in order, clear, and it was obvious that their dysfunctional relationship ended because of both of their actions. How was he supposed to atone for this? How was he supposed to find him, when Sanji was trapped in Hell? Was his Hell meant for him to be separated from Law because of it?

He was only vaguely aware of the shadow moving in the corner of the infirmary until he realized this world's Law was pulling up a chair next to the bed. Sanji was only aware of him because Law placed himself in Sanji's line of vision. Those discolored hands of his reached out, touched his upraised palm with gentle fingers, as if soothing a silent beast. As he did so, he seemed to clean the blood staining Sanji's hands. Little by little, the dirty red seemed to disappear. The meaning was vague to Sanji, so numb and lost that he could barely feel anything. If he wasn't seeing it, then he would've never known it was happening.

"When I was nine, my family was murdered by the World Government. Our entire town was built and prospered upon the fortune of a mineral that was only available there. But as a result, it cost generation upon generation an incurable disease. Of my family, my sister fell to it, first. Her name was Lamie. In my memory, I remember her smiling, laughing and very carefree. As she was my little sister, I saw her as all older siblings usually regarded their younger – sort of annoying. Clingy. It wasn't fair that she received the better share of our attention. That sort of thing. But…it's a shame that I don't remember more of our positive interactions. I'm sure there was more to it than she being a loud, spoiled younger sister. My heart has changed so much since then – I don't think it remembers too much of anything but hate and anger, so my memory holds all my pictures for me.

"The very last I saw of Lamie, she had withered away, dying painfully from the disease that left its mark on my skin. She was incoherent and weak, and in the middle of a hostile government turmoil, I remember thinking how inconvenient it was to tend to a sick, inconsolable child. Why should this be my responsibility? I was just as scared, hearing the massacre occurring outside. Shouldn't my parents be here, tending to us both? But at that moment, they were being murdered a few floors away, by Marines. Our peaceful city was a kill zone. All citizens were infected, and should be treated as such. Everyone was rounded up and murdered.

"I placed Lamie in a closet to hide her as patients were being shot in their beds, room by room. Then went and hid, myself. When I was sure it was clear, I went in search of my parents and found them murdered. Circumstances happened where I had to elude the Marines, taking me out of the building – taking me away from Lamie. When I was able to return, the entire building was aflame. She died somewhere in there, alone, sick and afraid – trapped in the closet I hid her in. Throughout the years, I hoped and prayed that she had been found by the Marines I'd eluded, giving her a faster death.

"I was the only survivor of that town…the only reason why I'd escaped was because I'd hid underneath the rotting bodies of corpses that were being transported out of the city, to be burned miles away. I eluded capture, and wound up in a harbor town, called Spider Miles. There, I met the Donquixote family. They were a force to be reckoned with. And they willingly took in anybody that was strong enough to join their ranks. Children included.

"At this time, I had no regard to human life. Everyone around me were only meat bags, and the Navy itself, the World Government – they were the worst of it. I was willing to kill myself if I could kill as many as I could of them. I would do whatever it took. Lives weren't precious – they weren't valuable. Everyone had one, but there was nothing about them that made this world worth living in. There, I met Corazon, who tried very hard to discourage me from joining. But as you know, I am a stubborn fellow."

It was so hard to talk. Both from the heaviness of the emotion on his chest, from the injuries around his throat. But the more Law spoke to him, the lighter it felt. It was as if the man were lifting an intense weight from his body, little by little.

"'Corazon'…your father," Sanji managed to murmur.

Law's fingers were rough against Sanji's. They smoothed out the tense curl of his fingers, wiping away more of those stains. Maybe it was just an unconscious action, touching Sanji in this way, but the man removing the blood from Sanji's hands as he spoke about himself was a symbolic action. Spiritually freeing him from his actions that horrible morning.

"Yes, father figure, if you will. He was very dear to me. At the time, I didn't realize just how much. He was just this annoying prat with bad habits and a target on his back for disaster. I hated him as much as the next man, but…for some reason, he took a liking to me. Somehow, he managed to convince me that life was…worth more than I thought it was. In just a short amount of time, he reminded me that there was good in this world. It was in unexpected places, but there was warmth and light in the dark and cold.

"He saved me, in every possible way. His death gave me a goal – to live until I could see the day when I had his revenge against his killer. That's what motivated me, Mr Blackleg, to continue living. Thirteen years later, I was able to obtain my goal. But afterward, despite certain conversations, I found myself questioning my purpose here in life. You see, a majority of my life was fighting for survival in hostile conditions. It is what it is. My goal now is to overthrow certain governments, based on my hatred for certain past actions, and obtain a very valuable treasure that a majority of pirates here in this world want to achieve. Despite being around such…cheer and idiocy in those that have not served a step in my shoes, I cannot seem to 'lighten up' to change my outlook and values, as it had been my personality for nearly two decades.

"My life is a constant run of loss, pain, and it's driven with hate. I'm not going to say that I've found other meanings to look for when it comes to more positive things. Certainly, I've run into a nice share after I'd formed my alliance with the Strawhats. I'll admit, their cheer, optimism and strength is…minutely refreshing," Law admitted reluctantly, reaching for Sanji's other hand. As he did with the other hand, he wiped sensation back into Sanji's palm, cleaning it with the tips of his white fingers. Watching as the stains disappeared made Sanji realize that Law was saving him as much as Law said Sanji saved him.

"But I know it won't last. Strawhat himself has learned why life isn't always about dumb luck and blind positivity. As a child born into war, my values are different from his. I cannot think the way that he does, and I don't think anything else can change it."

Sanji was quiet for a few moments, reflecting on what he said. "So, what you're telling me is, as long as you're alive, while you had a taste of the positive, you'll not change your point of view as a cold bastard."

"You cannot retrain a feral animal."

"But you're not feral because you know what it's like to be loved."

"I do. But I also know what it's like to lose that love. Therefore, it is expected once I obtain it. I find myself reluctant to entertain the thought of settling down after I've reached my goals, because I know that sort of fantasy, it…would be dangerous."

"Then, if you're lonely, find someone who shares the same values as you. Together, there is a different world to see."

"I'm saying, that this is my life, Sanji. As low as it can be, these levels, as it pushes me to an edge to consider other alternatives, the only thing that can save me in this world is myself."

"I don't…"

Law reached out, and touched his hand over Sanji's mouth with his. Sanji was very surprised at the contact, and at the small smile on the man's face. When he had the silence he wanted, he shifted his hand from Sanji's mouth to his throat. Erased the marks there with just gentle wipes of his fingers, allowing him to breathe, again.

"I know why you're here. You thought you could save me in the way that you felt you couldn't with your version of myself. Truthfully, when I spoke about the sea beckoning me, I was at one of my lowest points. I hadn't a clear goal in mind to motivate me. After thirteen years of wanting revenge, and obtaining a twisted version of it, I'm tired. I don't feel the same fire in me as I felt before. The one goal that had been my primary motivator had been completed, and I had yet to find the weight in the others I'd only considered as a fantasy. I thought it would be easy to slip underneath the waters when everyone wasn't looking, and I'd be long gone before they'd notice. I'll admit, I still think about it every day. How easy it would be to leave everyone I've come to know behind. To ease this anger and hatred in me.

"When I saw my reflection in you in the sea, I was caught off guard. Seeing myself with a peaceful soul, already at rest – I had thought, _If only I could be that relaxed_. To not feel for anything other than peace. With the concept of an afterlife, I would be reunited with all that I held dear in my heart. They would welcome me, I suppose. It would be wonderful. Even now, speaking of it, I would want that before I wanted anything else. On my way to show you the path to the stars, I would be the sea."

"I wouldn't want that for you. Why take your life so selfishly after all that's been done for you? Yes, it was miserable, yes, it's suffocating, but… in your journey, you made people fall in love with you, and now that you're in their life – it's selfish to leave them behind. Your pain would end - theirs would be forever."

"I understand the concept of your argument, but in the end, the choice is up to me. At the moment, Mr Blackleg, at rest, with nothing much else to do, I let my past catch up to me. But when I am off this ship and we are approaching an enemy – I think nothing more of the sea. My life is a constant battle of hardship and hatred, and that's what I use to survive.

"When I was tossed overboard during the storm, I let it happen. I felt for sure that this would be the end of all this overthinking. Let the storm take away everything I'd fought so hard for, and everything that had happened could just…end, and I would be the one in the sea, reaching for my peace. But suddenly you were there. You saved me, and as you were pulling me up to the surface, it wasn't you that held my wrist so tightly. It was myself. At that moment, the concept of peace as I saw myself – I know it's there for me. But not like this, not at this time."

Sanji looked down at the discolored thumb that rubbed tenderly at his. His hands were clean.

"Seeing myself in another life, knowing that I was capable of finding peace as another version of myself, it gave me a bit of strength. And seeing myself in the sea – it gave me peace, as well. How odd is that? Knowing that you are dead, and finding it soothing. Those footprints you leave behind are his – _mine_. I stepped on them, once – I saw his memories of you in them. Cherished, mournful memories that made me…uncomfortable with the very concept of such a relationship between myself and another person, yet, after, I couldn't help but do it again and again, and it was seeing your relationship with another version of myself that made me realize what you were doing."

"None of us are _dead_!" Sanji said shakily, taking his hand from his. "I'll wake up from this horrible nightmare, and - !"

"You'll find in your heart the truth, Sanji. I'm afraid that this journey wasn't yours, as odd as it was for you. Whatever happened that day…I apologize for your loss. But know that your voice and your presence, it had reached out to me. You had accomplished what you needed to. You helped me see that cutting my time short here based on my expectations of past loss wasn't my path. As much as I entertain the thought of letting the sea take over, it's not…it would be a waste. My time will come as violently as I live it, and not at my own hand. I accept that, now. For myself."

Sanji felt hot tears roll from his closed eyes. In a way, he wanted to scream with frustration. In another, he acknowledged relief. Startlingly _strong_ , grateful relief.

"It's my turn to deliver a favor. You know how to get to the stars. It's through the sea."

"How did this happen?"

"You heard a soul similar to the one you love cry out in pain similar to his. As odd as it is, this situation, I'm grateful that you stopped by. I think if I'd allowed myself to continue thinking as I did, I would've been walking right behind you. Seeing and speaking to you has allowed me to pull away from the sea. But now it's time for you to move on."

"But I'm not dead."

"Not yet."

Sanji sputtered a weak chuckle, tears still leaving his eyes with slow drops over his cheek, down his jawline. "Don't say it like that."

Law reached out and wiped Sanji's tears from his cheeks with a tender touch, smoothing the trails dry with his thumb. "When you get there, you'll find what you've been looking for. Know in your heart that you accomplished what you'd set out, for. You saved me. Now, it's time to find your own peace."

Sanji looked down, away from him. He was startled to see that the iPhone that he'd depended on since he'd arrived had been reset. It greeted him with its start-up screen, a cheery 'Hello' waiting for him to acknowledge it. So the phone _was_ connected to Law, after all. It determined his struggle to stay aloft, and only Sanji himself had been able to help. The lows and the highs of the battery percentage had been based on the man's own spiritual battle. Now that Sanji had done what he could for him, the revival was only an optimistic new start for Law to continue on.

The concept of his understanding of it, now, made him shake his head. If only he had known earlier, then…

"Whatever it was that happened, your actions…well, there are always consequences. Not to say it was entirely your fault, it's only up to you what happens as a result. But your intentions _here_ , they've been completed," Law said, holding Sanji's hand, drawing it to his mouth and kissing his knuckles. The gesture was so familiar, so warm that Sanji felt his heart expand, and he felt like his Law had reached out and touched Sanji, beckoning him to come to him.

"Go home to the stars, Sanji."

: :

The sea glittered with the blue sky above. The surface was still, and only the sails snapped through the warm air. When Sanji looked over the railing into the water, he could see the stars visible just below the surface. It filled him with joy to know that was his route to take. The more he thought of the darkness just beyond his reach, the more excited he felt at making the journey all the way. He looked at Law, who was watching him with a calm air, not standing as rigidly as Sanji had grown used to. He looked more relaxed, more accepting. He felt weird that the things Law had said to him felt true.

 _This wasn't his story_. He'd only been here to help the man see what he'd needed to in order to stay out of the sea. Almost like some sort of weird sea angel.

It had been painful for Sanji, but there was a part of him that felt relieved for the pain. Almost grateful, almost as if he'd deserved it.

"What about the others? Shouldn't I say something to them?" he asked.

"No. I'd rather they not know my business. Strawhat is insufferably clingy and persistent enough."

"Isn't he? But don't we need that sort of thing in our life?"

"I suppose."

"Will it be weird when the other guy comes back?" Sanji then asked tentatively. "We're not the same."

"Maybe a little. But that's only for me to know."

"And maybe Nami."

"Well…"

Sanji leaned up and kissed his cheek, fingertips on his jaw. "Live for the positive, too, okay?"

"I suspect I will see more of it after you leave. This fresh memory has certainly left a large impact in my thoughts. I feel like if I needed to, I know where I can find you."

"Not under the sea."

"In the end, it's my own decision. Sometimes, you can't always save someone from making their own choices. But you can definitely leave an impact in their thoughts. In the end, I find comfort knowing that I have a choice."

"As interesting as this all was, I need to go. I miss him."

Law gave him a small smile. "Goodbye."

Sanji gave him another quick kiss, then leapt over the railing. When he heard the splash, Law looked over to see him go, the ripples obscuring his vision for a few moments. When he popped his head back up, he felt his face shift with concern.

But Sanji looked up at him with a confused expression, then began flailing. "What the fuck? _What the fuck_ , my cigarettes! Who the fuck thought – did _you_ do this?"

"No. It appears you fell in, Mr Blackleg."

"My fucking cigarettes are _done_ for! Fuck - ! _Why_ am I out here? Aw, I bet it was – those fucking apples! NOBODY TOUCH THEM! I can't believe this shit, I'll never shop there again, this is _ridiculous_ – why am I WEARING these weird ass clothes? I'm fucking drowning here!"

Law had to snort as this world's Sanji flailed angrily, snarling as he patted his pockets. Then he was swimming for the side of the ship, hollering out, "Who's responsible for this shit? I will cut you up into bite sized pieces and feed you to everyone! Assholes! LUFFY!"

At the confused sounds of the rest of the Strawhat crew coming out from the kitchen, looking out in the water with bewildered expressions, Law turned away from them, seeking solace in the back of the ship. He heard Luffy's tentative shout, and then Sanji's angry reply, and that set them all off.

"I'm certain he'll find peace, now," Robin said, nearly startling Law with her sudden presence.

"He has."

"Who knew you were a ghost whisperer? You're a man of many secretive talents," she then said, chuckling lightly as she returned to the others, Sanji yelling at Franky, then Zoro for just standing there, 'looking at him'.

For the rest of the day, the crew treated Sanji differently. When made aware that some sort of switch had happened, he visually examined himself, cigarette shifted to the side of his mouth. He had a tray in one hand, with drinks for everyone, and while everyone was enjoying the rest of the late afternoon weather, he was passing them out.

"I remember testing out these pretty apples I bought from the market. They looked like the night sky."

"When I inquired about them, the seller had assured me they were normal fruits," Robin said. "I threw them away, just in case."

When Ussop kicked him in the shin, Sanji kicked him back. "OW! You shitty piece of shit, what was that for?"

"Just making sure it's you!" Ussop cried from across the deck, where Chopper tried to pull him down from one of the trees.

" 'Ow'?" Zoro repeated skeptically. "Did losing out on a wedding turn you into a pussy?"

"I mean, it was really inconvenient of you to kick me there, Ussop," Sanji amended, brushing off his slacks. "Anyway, I don't feel any different. I feel myself. Whatever happened, I don't feel, y'know, 'switched'."

"It definitely gave us another perspective, Sanji-kun," Nami admitted, looking at him worriedly. "I arranged a schedule so that all of us could handle cleaning duties and the like so that you're not doing all the work."

"Why?" Sanji asked her, kicking Zoro aside as the man moved to take a nap on the lawn nearby. "Get up, you slob, I don't want to trip over you! Wasn't I doing a good job? At least when I did it, I know it was done right."

"It was just...you do a lot for us. And we appreciate it, it's just...it's not just you. Okay? No arguments!"

"Anything for you, and anything you say is everything to me, my lovely beauty!" Then he looked over at Brook, who was making some adjustments to a new song he'd been singing. "Where did you learn that song?"

"You taught it to me! Oh ho ho ho ho ho, it's a romantic lullaby, sung to lure in the truest of hearts to another!"

"Well, it sounds dumb, and I don't like it. _Robin_! Does this song make you think of me?" he then asked, at her side in seconds with her favored hot tea in hand.

"Not at all!" she admitted. "It belongs to someone else."

"I don't think I missed your personality," Franky said to him, hands on his hips. "I think I liked the other one better."

"You talk to me like your shitty opinion matters to me," Sanji scoffed, walking off, taking care not to trip over Chopper as he pulled on Ussop so hard that he lost his grip and went tumbling backward. "Where's that rubber kid, at? I'm out here with snacks, and he's not here whining about seconds?"

"I'm right here, Sanji!" Luffy called from Nami's tangerine garden.

"GET DOWN FROM THERE!' Both Nami and Sanji shouted at him. Luffy hopped down, taking the slide so hard that when he neared the deck, he reached out, caught Sanji by the shoulders, and snapped them both towards the soldier's dock. Amidst the cursing, crashing and scuffling sounds, Nami relaxed in her chair.

"Look me in the eye, Sanji," Luffy said firmly, pressing his forehead against Sanji's. Sanji just looked back at him with bewildered action, holding his tray out of his reach. Luffy then pulled back with a wide smile, grabbing hold of his hands - just above the scars that were left behind by his father. "It's you, alright!"

"Of course it is, you shitty captain. Look, i'm aware something happened - but i'm back now, so I don't expected anybody treating me any differently. Whatever happened, it's over with. Now, get off me, you're heavy."

"If you're ever sad again, please tell someone," Luffy said, hugging him tightly before releasing him. Then he sniffed at the tray, looking at the small plate with glee. Sanji kicked him in the face with one leg, rising up with the other, then kicked him again to give himself space to walk off. _"Ow...I_ did not miss this at all."

"Did i just hear the captain say 'ow'?" Zoro bellowed with disgust. "Anyone that feels threatened by the runaway bride will need to come to me for further training!"

"Shut up, Zoro!" Nami hollered.

"Me! Me!" Chopper cried.

In response to Luffy's words, Sanji said over everyone's yelling, "Whatever pleases you, captain."

When Sanji made his way back to the kitchen, he veered off to the aquarium bar with the last item on his tray. He approached Law, puffing smoke around him before removing the cigarette from his mouth. "Shitty surgeon. You didn't eat all your breakfast."

"I wasn't all that hungry."

"Don't give me that shit. Eat this, and you better be at the table with the rest of us, tonight. I don't want to find you by yourself again, got it?"

"Don't order me around."

"I'm watching you," Sanji warned him, making the gesture as he turned with the tray underneath one arm.

Law just snorted, looking at the small plate of rolled hams with vegetables. "I know," he said quietly.

: :

That night, when everyone had gone to bed for the night – Sanji kicking Zoro repeatedly for not helping save him from his own goddamn wedding, Zoro cursing and fighting him back until Nami was throwing barrels at them both – Law sat at the back of the Thousand Sunny. He looked up at the night sky, scanning the brilliant blanket of blues, violets, black – the stars twinkled brilliantly, burning in the distance. As he listened to the waves crash against the ship, he felt peace warm his heart.

He felt comforted by the fact that, as wretched and low as he felt, there were those that were watching over him. He knew that if he wanted to talk as freely as he could with this other world Sanji, all he would have to do was to go the sea to reach the stars. He knew the man would reach out and catch him, return him to the surface like he had before.

He saw that the sky seemed fuller, tonight. It seemed to extend everywhere – the surface of the sea was so still that it reflected the entirety of the sky. When he reached out to see if he could actually touch the sky, he felt the sea touching him back.

"Just a little longer," he told himself, Kikuko agreeing with him reluctantly.


End file.
